


VAIRONS

by tinywhim



Category: Hamilton - Miranda, Hamilton - Miranda (Broadway Cast) RPF
Genre: F/M, Fanfiction, Forbidden, Friends to Lovers, Hamilton - Freeform, Kinda, Lin-Manuel Miranda/OC - Freeform, Love at First Sight, Romance, Slow Burn, french baguette, i can't stop thinking about the founding fathers someone please help, i wrote this on a whim but eh, not really a reader tho
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-07
Updated: 2019-11-21
Packaged: 2020-02-28 04:51:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 23
Words: 74,879
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18749368
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tinywhim/pseuds/tinywhim
Summary: ❝OUR FORBIDDEN LOVE LOOKS PERFECT ON YOUR LIPS.❞Everything was perfect in Lin's life.He had his Vanessa and his musical about a founding father was slowly coming along.But then, his heart heard her sing.And that's when it started.Lin-Manuel Miranda/OCUNDER MAJOR EDITING





	1. EPIGRAPH

> **  
> **
> 
> ****
> 
> When I saw you  
>  I understood what  
>  Love looked like.
> 
> _And it never looked more beautiful._


	2. PRELUDE

**  
****_"You two are bound to one another. You always have been ... and you can't run away from what you are. No matter where you go, your feelings for her are going to follow you."_**  
**― Mirella Muffarotto**

**s y n o p s i s**

A story about love at first sight. And its consequences in people's lives.

**c a s t**

A passionate singer as _Lilibeth Williams_  
A human dose of sunshine as _Lin-Manuel Miranda_

_They were inevitable.  
_

* * *

_**a/n** _ _: Can someone stop me please  ? I got obssessed with Hamilton and with its creator. I had to actually write something about him because he did get me inspired. It takes place around 2014-2015 and I made some changes about Lin and his sweet Vanessa's relationship. But everything will be told in time._  
_Enjoy._  
_love,_  
_tiny._


	3. PROLOGUE

   
    This was the night when everything turned upside down. It was the usual Friday night, where Lilibeth would be performing and she would basically own the stage as usual. Yet, something was different. He didn't know if it was because he had a long day, or because things had been tense with Vanessa lately.

    As she was singing, the red head beamed at him and he couldn't help but fall in love with her even more. Once she was done singing he grabbed her by her wrist and gently led her outside. She followed him happily but her smiled faltered when she saw the look on his face. She knew _that_ look. It was the same one he had when they had...

"I know we shouldn't do that, but I can't..."

"Lin, what are you talking about ?" she asked but there was fear in her voice and her eyes were weary.

"I think you know," she shook her head.

"No, Lin."

"Lilibeth, _please,_ " he breathed resting his forehead against hers.

"Lin we can't do that. I don't want to be this kind of person."

"Then don't be. I'll take the blame," he pleaded, cupping her face in his hands.

          How could someone say no to these eyes ?

"L-Lin I..."

" _Please_."

_Say no to this._

" **Please**."

_Say no to this._

"Alright."

 

* * *

 

COME TALK TO ME ON MY [TUMBLR](https://tinywhim.tumblr.com/).

 


	4. FIRST I HEARD YOUR VOICE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Boy meets a girl in the subway. He's wonderstruck. A coffee is shared.

_**If I'm a pagan of the good times** _  
_**My lover's the sunlight** _  
_**To keep the Goddess on my side** _  
_**She demands a sacrifice** _  
_**To drain the whole sea** _  
_**Get something shiny** _

     Lin thought it was a pretty normal day when he entered the subway. It was early and it wasn't as crowded as he thought it would be. He walked in the rhythm of the song he was listening to, his mind drifting in his work. He had yet to finish _Hamilton_.  
    There were some songs that were missing. They had already performed at the Vassar workshop last year, but he knew it wasn't enough. Tommy and Alex planned to take it to Broadways and he agreed with them. Surely, _Hamilton_ was slightly unconventional, but he knew that it was going to work. It had to.

     He couldn't be happier. His musical was coming along slowly, everything was perfect with his beautiful girlfriend and life was good. Halloween was just around the corner and he had planned to propose to his darling Vanessa. She was his joy and he couldn't picture himself with anyone else.  
    She was the one. He had it all prepared. He was going to cook her favourite meal, sing her a song, dance with her in the kitchen, because he knew she loved it when they danced together and he was going to get on one knee and...

_**What you got in the stable?** _  
_**We've a lot of starving faithful** _  
_**That looks tasty** _  
_**That looks plenty** _  
_**This is hungry work** _

     His heart heard her before his ears did. It was as if someone had plucked on his heartstrings to play the prettiest melody. He immediately took off his headphones and looked around, his feet gravitating toward the wondrous voice that was echoing in the subway.  
    His heartbeat was racing, urging him to find her, to put a face to this enchanting voice. He found her a couple of feet away from him. People were walking by, some stopping to listen, some barely acknowledging her.

_**Take me to church,** _  
_**I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies,** _  
_**I'll tell you my sins so you can sharpen your knife.** _  
_**Offer me that deathless death,** _  
_**Let me give you my love,** _  
_**Take me to church.** _

    She was breath-taking. She had a pale heart shaped face, full pink lips. He could not see the colour of her eyes, for they were closed. She sang with a passion, a fire that matched the colour of her hair. He did not understand how could one pass by her and not even look up.  
    Did they even hear her voice ? He had never heard anyone sing like this. It was raw, it was pure. _It was real._ He did not even realize that goose bumps and chills kissed his skin even though he was wearing a hoodie.

     Then she opened her eyes and he forgot how to breathe. He got sucked into different coloured orbs, a blue one and grey one. He had never seen a real person with mismatching eyes. Only on pictures, and it was indeed a pretty sight. Yet he had the impression that something was hiding behind her eyes. Something dark and heavy.  
    Still, they shone with happiness as she thanked people who put money in her hat. His palms were sweaty and he froze when she met his gaze. His heart let her in before his mind could even process her name.

"That was wonderful," he managed to speak and he was both thrilled and proud he didn't stutter.

"Thanks," she smiled.

       And oh, she _smiled._

    She started packing her stuff and he felt desperate. Was she going to leave ? Did he even make a good impression on her ? Did she know how star truck he was by her ? How could she walk away from him when he was stuck in time ?

"Ahem, what's your name ?" she turned around and eyed him up.

"Lilibeth. You ?"

"Lin-Manuel."

"That's a weird name," she shrugged. "But you look cute, though." He cleared his throat, embarrassed.

"You really have a beautiful voice."

"I bet you say that to all the pretty girls," he laughed.

"Not really, you're special."

"Oh, am I now ?" she arched an eyebrow and Lin already loved how easy going she was.

"You're special cookie."

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure I taste delicious too," she smirked playfully and he could not prevent his eyes to be drawn to her beautiful pink lips.

"Can I buy a drink ?"

          The words left his mouth before he could even realize what he was saying. She looked at her watch.

"It's pretty early, don't you think ?" she teased.

"Doesn't have to be alcohol," he shrugged, trying to act cool. "A coffee would be fine."

          She eyed him for a couple of seconds and nodded.

"Alright."

"Alright ?" he was actually surprised. "Alright."

"Alright," she grinned and he felt his heart beating faster.

"I know a great café, not far from here actually."

"Lead the way."

 

* * *

 

          It was one of his favourite places. It was not really far away from home and it not really busy. He liked to have his special place to write. He got a lot of inspiration coming from here. It was calm and no one really bothered him.  
          He was a regular costumer so he basically just needed to sit and Lila, the waitress, would bring him his usual. And even late at night, past before midnight they would let him stay a little bit longer.

     It was a nice cosy place, kind of like a cocoon. The music would never be too loud and always of good taste. He'd been coming to this café for several years. He knew Philipp, the owner very well. That's in this place he actually wrote _In the Heights_ and he used to talk about it with him. The man was very supportive and how many free coffees did he actually offer Lin ? He had lost count.

     But that's what he really liked about this café. It somehow was his working place where he could also relax. He had never brought Vanessa here. She had respected his privacy and told him that it was okay for him to have this place for himself.  
    And yet, there he was, sitting in front of Lilibeth who was taking her surroundings in. He didn't even realize that he'd been staring as he watched her looking around and smiling. Then he saw her mouth move but he hadn't paid attention to what she actually had said.

"Come again ?"

"It's really pretty here," she repeated. "It's cosy," he nodded.

"You know why I really like this place ?" she shook her head. "They close at midnight."

"Really ? That's really late," she thought out loud. "But it must be good to be able to grab a hot chocolate or a coffee this late at night."

"Absolutely and you haven't tasted their pastries yet."

"Probably another time."

"So there will be another time ?" he asked, hope clinging into his voice. She arched an eyebrow.

"I don't know, you tell me."

"Yes."

        She laughed.

"That was fast. But I was pretty sure you were going to say yes."

"Am I really that predictable ?"

"I don't know yet, I'll have to see," he felt overjoyed by the idea of seeing her again. "And what do you do in life ?"

"I write, actually. Songs, musicals..."

"Are you famous ?" she questioned.

"I definitely am," he smirked and she arched an eyebrow.

"Am I to understand that you are someone important ?"

"I'm definitely more important than the president," she laughed.

"You sure are, Lin-Manuel."

             He loved how his name sounded coming from her mouth.

"What do you do, in life ?"

"I live, that's a pretty tough thing," she smiled. "But actually I work in a bar. I need to pay the bills and unfortunately, singing won't help me with that."

"But it could. Have you ever tried Broadway ? I mean, you're in the city that never sleeps."

"I... I never have, actually."

        He raised his eyebrows in surprise.

"Really ? Why's that ? You do have the voice !"

"I know but I just..." she shrugged. "I guess I never found any musical to my liking."

"Well you know, I'm actually writing a musical," he informed her.

"Really ? What is it about ?" he took a deep breath.

"About a founding father and how noisy he could actually be."

"That does sound like Hamilton," he blinked. "Or Jefferson. But I mean, a founding father who could never shut up ?" she laughed. "Definitely Hamilton. Couldn't be Burr."

         She quickly recovered when she saw the look her was giving her. He looked so serious.

"What is it ?"

"It's just that... you know. You know history. I'm surprised !" he smiled and he lightened the whole room.

"I have a PhD with a major on American history," she simply replied. "I do love history, I wanted to be a teacher. But I guess I love music even more," she shrugged. "Doesn't matter anyway. So, it's about Alexander Hamilton ?"

"Yes. I read the biography written by Ron Chernow. And I really liked it and I got inspired."

"Yes, I did read it too," she nodded, sipping her coffee. "It was good. Some people don't even remember Hamilton and I think it's a shame. He did incredible things."

"Exactly ! And I thought, damn I need to write something about him. So actually I'm actually working on a hip-hop album—a concept album—about the life of someone who embodies hip hop, treasury secretary Alexander Hamilton."

"Hip Hop ?" she laughed. "Damn, I'd love to see it !" he grinned. "Does that mean there will be rap ?"

"Definitely."

"Wow, okay. Rap battle ?" She asked and his heart warmed when he saw how supportive and excited she was.

"Yes," he chuckled. "Cabinet rap battle between Jefferson and Hamilton."

"It must be lit."

"It kinda is," he grinned. "I mean, if you had told me like... ten years ago that I was going to write rap songs about the founding father, I wouldn't have believed you."

"I can guess so !" she laughed.

"Well now that I do know that you have your way with American history, I do have some questions about..."

    And that was it. They spent a couple of hours talking about the ten-dollar bill father, Lin clearly relishing in having someone to talk to about this project. He could talk about it with his Vanessa, who was completely supportive but it wasn't the same.  
    Lilibeth had the knowledge. He learnt a lot of things from her, things that weren't written in the book. Lin was over the moon. This morning, he had no idea that such a meeting would take place. He felt completely blessed to have come across her.

    _The subway girl_ , he called her. While she was talking, Lin couldn't help but to be drawn to her. Her voice, her eyes, her smile. Everything seemed too good to be true. He learnt that she actually was French and he was absolutely amazed by her accent, because actually, she had none.  
    He had always imagined French people speaking English with a ridiculous French accent, but not her. He was quite taken aback when he saw how fluent she was. When he told her that she only replied that she had studied English for a very long time and that she had become obsessed with movies and TV Shows, which had really helped her.

    Lin couldn't remember the last time he felt this good. He felt good when he was with his Vanessa, but this was different. There was something in the way Lilibeth held herself, as if every words could be her last.  
    She completely lived in the moment, telling him that you can die at any time so you better live your best life. Which is why she came to NYC. It had always been a dream and she'd been there for almost a couple of years. She looked at her phone who had buzzed and sighed.

"Shit."

"Everything alright ?" he asked, concern written in his frown.

"Yes, I gotta go."

         He immediately felt crestfallen.

"Oh."

"Thanks for the coffee."

"You're welcome."

       He wanted to ask for her number, but it probably was too forward. They'd only met this morning.

"It was nice talking to you, Hamilton."

"Hamilton, really ?" he arched an eyebrow, the corner of his lips twitching up a little bit.

"Yeah, you never shut up."

            He laughed.

"I guess you're right."

"Of course I am," she looked at her watched and rolled her eyes. "Anyway, it was nice to meet you too, Lin."

_Wait._

"You too."

           He didn't know if it was the look in his eyes, the way he fidgeted his hands or simply the lack of words coming from someone who couldn't shut up but she smiled.

"Hey, look inside your notebook."

"What ?" he replied but she was already gone.

            His heart was already aching for her. _Look inside your notebook ?_ He opened it, looking through the pages, looking for a clue when he stopped. On the very last page, something was written. And the handwriting was too pretty to be his.

_Here's my number._

_If you have any other questions about Hamilton, text me._

_Lilibeth._

     She was a hell of a woman.

* * *

_  
_

_COME TALK TO ME ON MY[TUMBLR](https://tinywhim.tumblr.com/)._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a/n : Hello there  ! I hope life is treating you well. Here's the first chapter, the meeting. And as we can see, Lin is already smitten with our lovely Lilibeth.  For Tim, I was greatly inspired by  Sergent Jeffords in Brooklyn nine nine. He's so sweet. Please, do tell me what you thought about it !  
> love,  
> tiny.  
> PS : Your kudos and comment give me life.


	5. THEN I SAW YOUR SMILE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lilibeth's POV of the meeting.

_"Je te déteste ! J'aimerais qu'une chose, c'est que tu crèves !" (I hate you ! I only want one thing, you dead !)_

         Lilibeth Williams woke up in a fright, sweat drenching her pillow, her heartbeat frantic. She could almost feel the rain on her face. She could almost feel the cold wind turning her limbs into stone. She could almost see the look on _his_ face. His mismatching eyes, red with tears. Had they ever been red ?

    Or was it just something she had imagined to make herself feel better ? Pretending that he cared. She had no idea. She shook her head, refusing to dwell on what had happened back home. There was a reason she had left.

    After graduating and getting her PhDs, she had decided to take a gap year and move from France to America. She wanted to travel, to discover new things and she needed a change of scenery. She had always wanted to go to New York City. For a girl who had always dreamed of being a singer, the city that never sleeps was perfect.

    Yet, she never auditioned for anything. She didn't find anything to her liking and she promised herself she would give it a shot after being financially stable and having some savings. She was supposed to be there for only a year, but then the city grew on her so she stayed.

     She had been lucky to get her job, actually. The first day she arrived, she was exhausted and she went into a bar and the owner asked her if she was interested in being a barista, because their last one had just quitted and they were in a terrible need of staff. She had immediately accepted.

    Turned out that Tim, the owner, was really sweet and he liked having her around. She was a quick learner and he did not regret for one second of having hired her. The customers really liked her and she was quite talented. She liked it here.

     As she ate her cereals and looked at the city's skyline over her kitchen window (it was the only good view of the city she had), she couldn't help but feel that something was different today. As usual, after getting ready, she left her house to go to the subway. She loved to sing there and people had the tendency to pay more attention to her in this place.

    She hoped she could make some spare money. She really wanted to move away from her flat and her salary as a barista wasn't enough. She was already saving money for something else anyway. Today she would sing _Take me to church_ , because she completely adored that song and she knew how good it sounded in the subway.

     As she was singing, she couldn't help but smile when people put bills and coins in her little black hat. It was a gift from her lovely mother and she always had it with her, even if she wasn't wearing it. An ocean was separating her from her family and she needed this constant reminder of her mother's love. Then, she saw two beautiful brown eyes and she felt her heart stop.

    She had always believed in love at first sight because that's how her parents fell in love. When she was a child, she was told how her mother had been in a bar, celebrating her graduation with her friends when suddenly her eyes fell on a man, who had been seated alone.

    But he had been looking at her for quite a while, from what one of her mother's friend had told her. Her mother had told her that when she had met his gaze, time stopped, just for a second, and that deep down, she had known. It was like having all the ' _I love you'_ said at once. As if for the first time, she was _alive._

    The stranger wasn't the kind of man that would have made her turn around in the street or catch her attention in a crowd, yet when she met his gaze, she felt utterly helpless. He had a gentle face and a mid-lengh brown hair, which looked extremely soft. He had a goat, which only made her smile even more, because she really liked men with facial hair.

    But nonetheless, he looked sweet, extremely so. And his eye... oh, _his eyes._ Even though they were dark, they were so expressive. Despite the fact that he was just standing, his feet were bouncing and she could tell he was a bundle of energy. Then he smiled and _oh, he smiled_.

"That was wonderful."

"Thanks." She smiled.

"Ahem, what's your name ?"

"Lilibeth. You ?"

"Lin-Manuel."

"That's a weird name," she honestly said, without being rude. "But you look cute, though," she blurted out, not even regretful.

        He really did.

"You really have a beautiful voice," he complimented, giving her a charming smile.

"I bet you say that to all the pretty girls," he laughed.

         She decided that it would be her favourite sound from now on.

 

* * *

 

     Who knew that when she woke up today, she would spend most of her day with a stranger in a cosy café talking about Alexander Hamilton and hip hop ? The man was insane, but she loved it. It really was ambitious of him to write a musical about this founding father and if it ever worked, Lilibeth promised him that she would go and see it.

    She couldn't help but smile as she put her apron at work. She hadn't been in New York for a really long time but she did have some friends. Yet she was still glad to have met Lin. She knew that it was the beginning of something beautiful and perhaps, romantic.

           She wasn't blind. Of course she had seen how attracted he was to her. But she was also no fool. She wouldn't try anything before knowing more about him first. She did admit that he looked adorable. She wondered if he had a girlfriend. She really hoped he didn't.

    She almost chided herself. She knew she shouldn't get overly attached to him, but she was like that. Her heart had a lot of love to give and Lin looked like he could use some. She did have a good feeling about him. She was rarely mistaken when it came to this.

"How was your day, Eliza ?" Tim asked her.

"Quite good. I met someone," she smiled.

"Oh did you now ?" he arched an eyebrow, making her laugh.

"Yes, I did. He's a singer, or musician. Or both."

"Perfect for you then. What's his name ?"

"Lin."

"Weird."

"Shut up."

"Alright, alright," he raised his hand in mock surrender.

"I'm not going around and telling you how Penelope is a weird name."

"Hey, don't mess with my wife's name. And for your information, there's a movie called Penelope. So it's not that weird !"

"Have you ever seen the movie ?"

"Not yet."

"That's what I thought," she snickered. "How come she didn't show it to you ?"

"She tried. Several time. I always managed to doge it."

"You do know that you won't be able to do that forever."

"C'mon man, let me dream !"

"By the way, how's little Rosa ?"

"Man, she started crawling and I swear that by next week she'll be running," he proudly declared and she could almost see him cry.

          He definitely was a doting father. Which was quite funny because of his appearance. He was tall and all muscled up, almost looking like a Terry Crew. The kind of man you don't want to mess with. And yet when it came to his little Rosa, he turned into the softest teddy bear.

"She makes daddy so proud."

"I bet she does. Wait until she says her first words."

"Don't tell me, I'm trying to bribe her so she can say Daddy first."

"How can you bribe a baby ?"

"Affection," he simply replied. She arched an eyebrow. "I do not plan to lose that bet."

"If you lose, Penelope will win the money, so it'll never really leave your household."

"Is that what you think ? She's going to buy herself a new pair of shoes. Damn Elizabeth, how many pairs of shoes do you really need ?"

"Two, maybe three ?"

"Two what ? Hundred, thousand ?" she laughed hard. "Don't laugh. We have a room just for that at home. I'm scared to enter it."

"Are you scared of the room, or of what Penelope would do to you if you ever messed with her shoes ?"

"That's insane," he scoffed. "I'm not scared of Penelope." Lilibeth tilted her head and waved.

"Oh, there she comes."

"WHERE !?" he screamed with a high pitched voice and turned around.

           No one was there. The red head smirked.

"Not scared my ass."

"Ha ha ha. Very funny. Look at that, I'm dead."

"C'mon, stop talking a work already !" she teased him.

"I should be the one telling you that ! I'm your superior."

"You wish."

 

* * *

 

      The thing with her work was that her shifts always ended in the middle of the night. Tim kindly gave her a ride home, rambling about how cute his daughter's eyes were. Penelope and Tim had been together for more than eight years. They had met when they were teenagers, fell in love, got married... The kind of romance you always find in books.

    Tim had been the first one to make the Chélie feel like home for Lilibeth. He had been sweet, kind and caring. She was the little sister he never had. She got along with Penelope as well. The woman was strong, confident and hardworking. They immediately became great friends.

    Once she was home, she watered Edgar and Aunt May and decided to go to sleep after taking a quick shower. When she settled in her bed, she heard her phone vibrating.

> **From anonymous :** **Hey, it's Lin, from earlier. You know, Hamilton hip hop and cabinet rap battle ? I was quite surprised to find your number in my notebook. When did you even write it down ? I'm pretty sure I was there the whole time.**
> 
> **To Lin : Hey, Hamilton, you wish you knew, right ? Well I'm surprising. And I am fast. Like a ninja.**
> 
> **From Lin :** **I'm pretty sure you used dark magic.**
> 
> **To Lin : And I am surprised you are still up at this time.**
> 
> **From Lin : A bad habit of mine. I go to bed late at night and wake up early.**
> 
> **TO Lin : Do you even sleep ?**
> 
> **From Lin : I do close my eyes from time to time.**

          That made her laugh.

> **To Lin : That's rather worrying and bad for your health. I'm pretty sure you drink a lot of coffee.**
> 
> **From Lin : Is that because you saw me drain three cups of coffee when we were at Philipp's ?**
> 
> **To Lin : Not really. You're way too much energetic to only rely on water**
> 
> **From Lin : Touché, Miss Williams, touché.**
> 
> **To Lin : By the way, I hope you're really prepared to have silly questions asked to you at random time. Because I'm that kind of girls.**
> 
> **From Lin : Try me.**
> 
> **To Lin : Right now ?**
> 
> **From Lin : Did I stutter ?**
> 
> **To Lin : Fine. Do you ever wonder if oceans are afraid of water ? They tend to have feelings you know. That's why waves exist.**
> 
> **From Lin : Wow. I'm pretty sure you can turn that into a poem.**
> 
> **~~To Lin :~~ ~~You are the poem.~~ **
> 
> **To Lin : We'll see, maybe one day I'll write a poetry collection and you'll just have to get an autograph from me.**
> 
> **From Lin : I'll be the first in line.**

 

* * *

 

Come talk to me on my [tumblr](https://tinywhim.tumblr.com/).

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a/n : Hello lovelies ! How has life been treating you so far ? I can't wait to develop Lilibeth's character and her friends. I definitely got inspired by Sergent Jeffords from Brooklyn nine nine for Tim. I absolutely adore his character and that exactly how I pictured our dear barista. Anyway, I decided I would upload two chapters a week at most and I'll see where it goes ! We'll get a litte bit of Alex Lacamoire in the next chapter. Do tell me what you thought of it !  
> love,  
> tiny.


	6. I KNEW YOU WERE MY NEXT MISTAKE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lilibeth sings. Alex is awestruck. Lin is enamoured.

"Lin darling, is everything alright ?"

         Lin was currently working on some songs on his computer. He wanted to send them to Alex so that he could know what his friend thought about it. He knew that improvements could be made and that Lac had a valuable experience with music. More than him, for sure.  
        The way he played piano was absolutely wondrous. He wondered if he could play for Lilibeth and have her sing with him. He'd love to hear them together. Apart from that one time at the subway and from the few moments where she would hum a tune, he never got the chance to hear her sing again. He wished he did though. He should take her to a karaoke. He knew they would have a lot of fun.

"Lin ?"

         He gazed up. His Vanessa looked beautiful in her nightgown. She had purchased it just for him because it blue, one of his favourite colour. The other being grey. It made him think of Lilibeth's mismatching eyes.

"I'm sorry, what ?"

"I was just wondering if you were okay."

"O-oh, yeah, totally. I'm working on a new song."

"Really ?" Vanessa kissed his forehead and sat besides him, resting her head on his shoulder. "How is it going ?"

"It's quite alright. I have to send it to Alex, though."

"Wise Alex."

"Wise Alex," he repeated, smiling.

"I love you," she whispered as she closed her eyes.

           Her job was taking most of her time and she came back even later than before, always exhausted. Yet he knew she loved it. She was a talented laywer and she had worked very hard to be where she was now.

"Me too," he kissed her temple and sent the sample to his friend. "Come on, we should go to bed. It's late and you need to rest."

"Says the man who drinks ten coffees a day and never sleeps," she smirked but she still followed him to bed.

"At least I don't have to wake up at six am."

"But you do," she pointed how, crawling under the sheets.

"But I do," he accepted, lying next to her.

        She cuddled with him, a happy smile on her face.

"I really wish we could spend more time together."

"Me too."

"I hope you're not too bored."

"Nah, I'm okay," he replied, thinking of the red head. "You know me, I can always get distracted by something."

"Yes I know," she chuckled and kissed his cheek before turning his back to him. "Goodnight, baby."

"Goodnight, Vanessa," he replied and eyed her as she quickly fell asleep.

          Being a lawyer was no easy task, that he knew. He wondered how his clever girl managed to handle it. He heard his phone buzzle and he smiled when he saw the text.

> **From Lilibeth : Hey, u up to grab a coffee tomorrow ?**
> 
> **To Lilibeth : Sure thing. We say ten ?**
> 
> **From Lilibeth : You got me.**
> 
> **To Lilibeth : ~~I wish I did.~~**
> 
> **To Lilibeth : See you then.**
> 
> **From Lilibeth : Goodnight, Lin. (:**
> 
> **To Lilibeth : Goodnight, Lil. :)**

     He couldn't help but smile. She was sweet yet fierce. That's what he loved about her. She didn't mess around; she didn't beat around the bush. She lived every day at 1000% because ' _there's no certainty for tomorrow._ ' It basically was her mantra.  
    He promised himself he would print it on a shirt and gift it to her. He wondered if she'd like it. She probably would. She'd probably wear it proudly everyday if she could. Just to make him smile.

     When he woke up Vanessa was long gone, even if it barely was 7 AM. He was already looking forward the café and couldn't contain his excitement as he was getting ready. He also got a text from Alex, asking him if they could see each other today.  
    He wanted to talk about _Hamilton_. There were a few things he needed to cover and he could also introduce Lilibeth to him, if she were to be free this afternoon. He knew that Lac would love her. Who would not love her, anyway ?

"Well, don't you look happy today Lin," Philipp remarked as the Puerto Rican entered his establishment.

"Do I ?" he asked, with a wide smile on his face.

"Is the musical going well ?"

"Yes it is," he nodded. "Thanks."

"You seem happier ever since you've met that girl of yours," he noticed and Lin froze.

"Sorry ?"

"Lilibeth, was it ? She seems really sweet."

"She is," he carefully replied. "But she's just a friend."

"Is she ?"

           He looked at him for a couple of second.

"Yes," he lied with a smile. "Let me remind you that I do have a girlfriend, Philipp."

"Who are you trying to fool Lin ?"

"Hello !"

           He turned his head and was greeted by a smiling Lilibeth. She looked so beautiful in her dress he forgot his own name.

"Hello, Lilibeth," Philipp greeted, smirking when he saw Lin's expression.

"Hey."

           The brown eyed man finally managed to breathe, making Philipp chuckle. He sent him a death glare and turned his attention to his friend. He led her to a table, ignoring the owner's stare and sat down.

"So what's up ?"

"I felt like seeing you today," she shrugged and his heart made a kick flip in his chest.

"Well that's sweet," he smiled and she couldn't help but imitate him.

"How's the writing going ?"

"Pretty good, actually. And you, the singing ?"

"I managed to make some money, so I'm fine," she nodded.

"You know that I could introduce you to some friends of mine, of the industry."

"Is that so ? Are you trying to make me famous, Mr Miranda ?"

"Maybe I am," he smiled more to himself as he looked down. "Do... do you have anyone special in your life ?" he curiously asked, out of nowhere.

"Actually yes," she nodded, making his heart drop. "My mum's dog, Snoopy."

         That made him laugh.

"That's a pretty serious relationship."

"Is that so ?" he arched an eyebrow and she eagerly nodded before giggling.

"And you ?" he hesitated.

"Yeah, I actually have a girlfriend," he informed and he missed the flash of disappointment that passed in Lilibeth's eyes.

"Okay. Cool," she nodded. "What does she do ?"

"She's a lawyer. A pretty good one."

"Wow," she replied, impressed. "She must be clever."

"More than me, that's for sure."

"That's not really complicated, Lin," she retorted.

"Low blow, Lilibeth, low blow," she chuckled. "Anyway, I have to meet with a friend this afternoon, I have to make him listen to some of my songs, you'd like to come ?"

"Sure thing but I won't be able to stay for too long, my shift begins at seven."

"That's alright. Maybe you could do a little bit of singing ?"

"Sure, if you pay me."

"You're kidding right ?"

         She looked him dead serious and he sighed.

"Alright, how much ?" she bursted out of laughing.

"Oh my God, you were totally going to pay me. Nice," she smirked.

"Of course I was ! I just want you to sing," she rolled her eyes and smiled.

"That's okay, keep your money, Miranda. I'll do it for free, just for you," she winked and he almost blushed.

        He internally scoffed, He was a grown man for God's sake, he didn't blush !

"I'm pretty sure Alex will love you."

"Oh, really ?"

"Yeah."

"He's the one who helps you writing Hamilton ?"

"Yeah, he's a better pianist than I am and I value his opinion and advices greatly."

"You admire him."

"Absolutely."

     They met him in a studio and Lilibeth felt slightly out of place. She had never been to a studio before. She had always wanted, for sure, but she never got the chance. Lin took her hand and gracefully led her into a room and through the window that separated the two rooms she could see a man playing piano.  
     _He plays well_ , she noticed. She smiled as she listening to the melody. She had always loved piano, because you could play melancholic songs, simple melodies that could make you miss or long for someone you have never met. Once he was done, they joined him.

"Hey Alex."

"Lin !" he smiled. "How are you, man ?"

"Fine, fine. Oh, here's Lilibeth."

"Oh, the subway girl," she arched an eyebrow, casting Lin a glance.

"The subway girl ? Really ?"

"What ? I think it's beautiful," Lin retorted and she only chuckled.

"Yeah, it sure is."

"I was told that you sing well ?" Alex intervened.

"I do my best."

"Shut up, you're amazing and you know it," Lin huffed. "Hey, why don't you sing something for Alex ?"

"Am I getting paid ?"

"Shut up," she laughed.

"Alright, Alex, do you know the chords to defying gravity ?"

"Sure thing."

"Let's do this."

          She sat on the piano bench next to Alex and he started playing.

"Do you mind if I take a video and put it on twitter?" Lin asked. "It's for school," she chuckled and nodded. "Thanks."

**_Something has changed within me_ **   
**_Something is not the same_ **   
**_I'm through with playing by the rules of someone else's game_ **   
**_Too late for second-guessing_ **   
**_Too late to go back to sleep_ **   
**_It's time to trust my instincts, close my eyes and leap!_ **

          As he was recording, Lin couldn't help his smile to grow. She was absolutely gifted and he already knew that she was going to have a part in his musical, if he had any say in it.  
        She needed to be on the spotlights, she deserved it. Fame and glory, they were hers to take. Perhaps he could help her, he knew a lot of people in the industry and he knew they would be more than delighted to meet her.

**_It's time to try_ **   
**_Defying gravity_ **   
**_I think I'll try_ **   
**_Defying gravity_ **   
**_Kiss me goodbye_ **   
**_I'm defying gravity_ **   
**_And you won't bring me down_ **

**_I'm through accepting limits 'cause someone says they're so_ **   
**_Some things I cannot change but 'til I try, I'll never know!_ **   
**_Too long I've been afraid of losing love I guess I've lost_ **   
**_Well, if that's love, it comes at much too high a cost!_ **

     As she uttered these words she looked straight at Lin and his breath got caught up in his throat.

**_I'd sooner buy_ **   
**_Defying gravity_ **   
**_Kiss me goodbye_ **   
**_I'm defying gravity_ **   
**_I think I'll try_ **   
**_Defying gravity_ **   
**_And you won't bring me down_ **

**_I'd sooner buy_ **   
**_Defying gravity_ **   
**_Kiss me goodbye_ **   
**_I'm defying gravity_ **   
**_I think I'll try_ **   
**_Defying gravity_ **   
**_And you won't bring me down!_ **   
**_Bring me down!_ **

**_Ohh ohhh ohhhh!_ **

"That was... wow," Alex blinked, astonished. "Lin told me you were good, but I wasn't excepting that."

"Thank you," she smiled.

"How come you never auditioned for anything ?"

"I don't know... I guess I just didn't find anything that really interested me. I only want to be in a musical or whatsoever if I like the story."

"Seems fair."

"Hey, Lilibeth, do you have a twitter ?" Lin asked her and she shook her head.

"No, why ?"

"Just wanted to mention you in my tweet."

"You're such a child."

"I definitely am."

**@Lin_Manuel : I present thee the Subway girl. Actually so proud to have talented friends. With @Lackety_Lac**

"There you go," he twitted.

"So, you had something to make me listen ?" the pianist questioned.

"Oh yeah ! I almost forgot."

"As if..."

"Lilbeth, be a darling alright ? Sit here and look pretty," he led her to a chair and she chuckled.

"I can do that."

"Perfect. Now, Alex, I came up with something and I need you to tell me what you think. This one's for Burr and Hamilton, their duel," he sat on the piano bench and casted a look at the red head. "Be prepared, you're going to hear your first Hamilton song."

"I'm all ear," she smiled encouragingly.

**_One-two-three-four-five-six-seven-eight-nine_ **   
**_There are ten things you need to know (number one!)_ **   
**_We rowed across the Hudson at dawn_ **   
**_My friend, William P. Van Ness signed on as my (number two!)_ **

**_Hamilton arrived with his crew_ **   
**_Nathaniel Pendleton and a doctor that he knew (number three!)_ **   
**_I watched Hamilton examine the terrain_ **   
**_I wish I could tell you what was happening in his brain_ **

**_This man has poisoned my political pursuits!_ **   
**_Most disputes die and no one shoots (number four!)_ **   
**_Hamilton drew first position_ **   
**_Looking, to the world, like a man on a mission_ **

**_This is a soldier with a marksman's ability_ **   
**_The doctor turned around so he could have deniability (five!)_ **   
**_Now I didn't know this at the time_ **   
**_But we were near the same spot my (your) son died, is that why? (six!)_ **

**_He examined his gun with such rigor?_ **   
**_I watched as he methodically fiddled with the trigger_ **   
**_confession time? here's what I got_ **   
**_My fellow soldiers'll tell you I'm a terrible shot (number eight!)_ **

**_Your last chance to negotiate_ **   
**_Send in your seconds, see if they can set the record straight_ **   
**_They won't teach you this in your classes_ **   
**_But look it up, Hamilton was wearing his glasses_ **   
**_Why? If not to take deadly aim?_ **

**_It's him or me, the world will never be the same_ **   
**_I had only one thought before the slaughter_ **   
**_This man will not make an orphan of my daughter (number nine!)_ **

**_Look him in the eye, aim no higher_ **   
**_Summon all the courage you require_ **   
**_Then count (one-two-three-four-five-six-seven-eight-nine, number-ten paces, fire!)_ **

**_I imagine death so much it feels more like a memory_ **   
**_Is this where it gets me, on my feet, sev'ral feet ahead of me?_ **   
**_I see it coming, do I run or fire my gun or let it be?_ **   
**_There is no beat, no melody_ **

**_Burr, my first friend, my enemy_ **   
**_Maybe the last face I ever see_ **   
**_If I throw away my shot, is this how you'll remember me?_ **   
**_What if this bullet is my legacy?_ **

**_Legacy, what is a legacy?_ **   
**_It's planting seeds in a garden you never get to see_ **   
**_I wrote some notes at the beginning of a song someone will sing for me_ **   
**_America, you great unfinished symphony, you sent for me_ **

**_You let me make a difference, a place where even orphan immigrants_ **   
**_Can leave their fingerprints and rise up_ **   
**_I'm running out of time, I'm running, and my time's u_ **   
**_Wise up, eyes up_ **

**_I catch a glimpse of the other side_ **   
**_Lawrence leads a soldiers' chorus on the other side_ **   
**_My son is on the other side_ **

**_He's with my mother on the other side_ **   
**_Washington is watching from the other side_ **   
**_Teach me how to say goodbye_ **

**_Rise up, rise up, rise up, Eliza!_ **   
**_My love, take your time_ **   
**_I'll see you on the other side_ **   
**_Raise a glass to freedom_ **

**_wait!_ **

**_I strike him right between his ribs_ **   
**_I walk towards him, but I am ushered away_ **   
**_They row him back across the Hudson_ **   
**_I get a drink_ **

**_I hear wailing in the streets_ **   
**_Somebody tells me, "you'd better hide"_ **   
**_They say Angelica and Eliza_ **   
**_Were both at his side when he died_ **

**_Death doesn't discriminate_ **   
**_Between the sinners and the saints, it takes and it takes and it takes_ **   
**_History obliterates, in every picture it paints_ **   
**_It paints me and all my mistakes_ **

**_When Alexander aimed at the sky_ **   
**_He may have been the first one to die_ **   
**_But I'm the one who paid for it_ **   
**_I survived, but I paid for it_ **

**_Now I'm the villain in your history_ **   
**_I was too young and blind to see_ **   
**_I should've known_ **

**_I should've known the world was wide enough for both Hamilton and me_ **   
**_The world was wide enough for both Hamilton and me_ **

    There was something almost inhuman with Lin and the way he performed in front of her. The way his eyes sparkled with passion, his hands moving with every words that came out of his mouth... It was beyond words.  
    The man was a performer. A perfect one. The song was impressive and wondrous. There were so much information and it was painfully beautiful. Hamilton was clever. Too clever for his own good.  
    And the way Lin's voice broke over some sentences just broke her heart. Once he was done he took a deep breath. Lilibeth was amazed by the quantity of lyrics the song was composed of.

"So ?" he asked but then he froze when his eyes found her face. "Are you alright ?"

           Lilibeth didn't realize tears were flowing out of her eyes and rolling on her flushed cheeks. He immediately knelt before her and took her hands in his.

"I'm sorry," she rubbed her eyes. "This song is a tragedy. And it so beautiful..." she breathed and he rubbed her back to give her some comfort. "And you wrote this all by yourself ?" he nodded. "You're a bloody genius. I mean... Wow. Everything you say can be turned into a poem, Lin. The part with the legacy ? Heart-wrenching. The part with Hamilton talking to his wife ? Heart-breaking. And Burr realizing only too late that he didn't have to kill Hamilton ? Heart-shattering. Me crying my eyes out over this ? Done. I'm such a mess," she sighed.

"I had no idea that you were going to react this way..." he carefully admitted. "But I guess it means I did my job right."

"You guess you did your job right !? Lin are you kidding me ? You made me cry like tomorrow wasn't going to come ! You are brilliant !"

           The way she spoke with sincerity and velocity warmed up his whole soul.

"Is it the last song of the show ? When Hamilton dies ?"

"Second to last," he rectified.

"Okay I'm definitely not ready for all of this," the two men chuckled. "I literally had chills, I swear, look," she showed him her arms and he grinned.

"Thank you," he dramatically bowed. "Hey, I was wondering, would you mind singing Aaron Burr's lines ? So we can have a better view of the song ?"

"Not at all ! I can try."

        They sang the song together and Lin couldn't help but feel a little giddy about singing with the red head. Alex tilted his head as he looked at them.

"Wow, that's even better."

"She's right, Lin," Alex confirmed. "That's a really good song. I do have a couple of suggestion for the chords, if you allow me."

"By all means, do."

     Lilibeth had never entered a studio before but with these two sweethearts ? It felt like home. They spend a couple of hours performing some songs from _Hamilton_. Lin explained Lilibeth that he wanted to take it to Broadway but that it wouldn't be before another year, at least.  
    The plot was there, the first act was complete but they only had three songs for the second act. Plus, some adjustments had to be made. And then they would have to plan the whole show as well.  
    Lilibeth felt extremely honoured to be a part of this, of being made aware that something THAT big was happening. Both of Alex and Lin were music geniuses. She knew that she could sing and write some songs, but rapping and improvising like that ? Hell no.

 

* * *

 

"That was really amazing back then."

"Thanks."

          Lin blushed as he looked down. Lilibeth wondered how someone with so much talent could be so humble.

"You're really working hard for this, aren't you ?"

        It was more a statement than a question.

"Always."

"And thank you for including me. In all of this. It's like... an adventure, you know ?" she grinned and he couldn't help but imitate her.

"You're right."

"And if you need someone to listen to your songs, I'm here."

"Really ?"

"Well, of course. I mean, you're on something big, Lin. And I am thrilled that you decided to share this with me. So if I can be of any help, it would be my pleasure."

        He stared at her for a little too long.

"Thank you, Lilibeth," she looked at her watch.

"I have to go to work."

"Wait, I'll walk you."

"How knightly of you."

"I'm too short to be a knight," he scoffed.

"Kick your enemies in the legs, you'll be taller then."

"Amazing survival advice from Miss Lilibeth Williams. Let me write that so I can have it written on my grave."

"Now that's what I call a commitment. Silly man," she sighed with a smile on her face.

"Do you know that this silly man in question," he began, pointing at himself. "Would love to hear you sing again ?" she eyed him for a couple of seconds.

"The Chélie."

"I'm sorry what ?"

"I'm performing at the Chélie, Friday night."

        He thought it heart was going to burst out of his chest in excitement.

"In Washington Heights ?"

"Yep," she nodded, popping the 'p'. "Every Friday night they set up a stage where you can go, grab an instrument and play and sing to the crowd. It's pretty cool."

"And you've been keeping this from me ?" he asked, pretending to be offended, with a hand on his chest. "I thought we were close, Lilibeth."

"Oh but we are," she assured him.

"Maybe I'll see you there."

"Well if you go on a Friday night, you'll definitely see me there. Or any other night, for that matter."

"I didn't know you were an alcoholic." he teased.

"I work there, idiot."

        That caught his attention.

"You work there ?"

"Yup."

         He remembered that she had told him that she worked as a barrista, when they'd first met.

"You must be pretty good with cocktails and shits like this."

"You're damn right I am," she laughed. "But I've learnt, that's what I did. I'm a quick learner."

"I guess I'll just have to pass by then."

"I guess so," she shrugged. "Do you think I should have a twitter account ?

"Definitely yes!"

 

* * *

 

_Come talk to me on my[tumblr](https://tinywhim.tumblr.com/)._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a/n : Hello lovelies ! I've been quite productive with this story and I managed to write several chapters in the spawn of a week, so I am quite delighted. Defying Gravity is a favourite of mine and I can perfectly picture Lilibeth slaying it. I really like Alex too, he's really sweet and very supportive with Lin. (I mean, you just have to watch the video of Lin performing Alexander Hamilton at the White House in 2009 and see the way Alex looks at Lin when he's singing. So sweet.) I can't wait for you to read the next chapters, because I really liked them. They're getting longer and I have so many things I'd like to include in this story. I do hope I'll have time for it. What did you think of the chapter ?  
> love,  
> tiny.


	7. BROADWAY, HERE I COME !

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lin and Lilibeth sing together. Alex is flabbergasted.

     Lin was overexcited. Today was Friday and for the first time he would see Lilibeth perform at the Chélie. He didn't tell Vanessa where he was going. She already had some plans, she was seeing her co-worker Mike tonight since they were working a case together for her work.  
     The week had been exhausting, he had to hurry to write songs, so he was glad to be able to finally relax. Lin was surprised to see how cozy the bar was. It was quite crowded, which was usual for a Friday night, but he didn't really mind.  
         It took him several minutes to reach the counter where he was greeted by a dark-skinned man. A huge dark-skinned man. He mistook him for someone from the security but then he saw the man serving drinks. _Must be a barista then._

"What do you need, man ?" Tim asked him rather loudly so he could be heard over the music.

"I'll take a mojito please."

"I'm on that !" a familiar voice replied and he couldn't help but smile when he saw Lilibeth. "Hey, I thought I would never see your face again."

"You wish."

"You came to hear me sing ?" he nodded.

"Yeah, but can you though ? I mean, you're the barista too."

"I only sing one song or sometimes two. It doesn't take long and Timmy here," she pointed at her friend who raised his two fingers in a salute as he was serving someone. "Can manage without me for a few minutes."

"You're damn right I can!" he called over his shoulder and she chuckled. "I could do this all night."

"Yeah, yeah, right," she turned her attention on Lin again and gave him his drink. "This one's on me. Try to find somewhere to sit."

"Thanks. And I'd rather be standing," he informed her.

"Your choice."

     His eyes did not leave her even when she started working again. She had her red hair tied in a messy bun with a light makeup, which made her look quite sexy. He wasn't used to see her like this.  
    He saw how she interacted with the costumers. From what he understood, most of them were regulars and he could see they were happy to have her around. From time to time she would cast him a glance and wink at him. He was pretty sure he was eye-fucking her too.

"Oh my God, are you Lin-Manuel Miranda ?"

           Regretfully, he turned his head to find a pretty blond haired girl with a sweet smile.

"I guess I am," he replied with a charming smile. "And you are ?"

"Oh, sorry, right, I'm Chloe. I'm such a huge fan of in the Heights ! I watched it twice !"

"I'm glad you like my work," she eagerly nodded.

"You really are talented. I can't wait to see your next work."

"I'm really touched. That's really sweet of you. Thank you," he humbly answered, bowing slightly.

"I heard that you are working on a musical with Alexander Hamilton, is that true ?"

"Yes, I actually am," he enthusiastically replied. "It's a lot of work. I mean, I do have to write a lot of songs and everything," she nodded in understanding.

"Do you plan to take it to Broadway ?" she asked, curious. "If you do, I'll be the first to watch it ! I'll bring my little brother with me, maybe that'll teach him some history," he laughed. "He can't seem to focus in class."

"Yeah, I'll try. And if I manage to make him learn his lessons, then I'll have succeeded in my job," she beamed.

"Do you mind if I take a picture of you ? I mean... with you ?" she corrected, slightly blushing.

"Not at all, but the lighting is pretty shitty."

           That made her laugh.

"Don't worry, I have a good front camera."

          They took several pictures and she thanked him again before leaving.

"That was quite the show," startled, Lin quickly turned around to see the red head smirking.

"Oh, just a fan," he waved as if it were no big deal. "It really makes me happy to see how my work impact people's lives."

"I didn't know you where THAT famous. Truth to be said, I only heard your name from your mouth," she admitted, looking down as if she was ashamed by her lack of culture. He took her hand and gently rubbed it, giving her a reassuring smile.

"I'm not surprised. I am not that famous in France," her lips broke into a small grin. "And I prefer it this way. It's less awkward."

"You know, maybe with _Hamilton_ you'll become even more famous than you already are and you won't be able to use the subway anymore."

"Nonsense," he scoffed. "I do have a hoodie you know. I can hide very well in a crow."

           That made her laugh. Lin fell a little bit more for her.

"Are you going to sing ?"

"I don't know, maybe. I could sing a song from _Hamilton_. Like, Alexander Hamilton. I could use Alex on the piano though..."

"Well send him a text to come here. Can't you play it ?"

"Yes I can, but I like it better when it's Alex." he pouted, reminding her of a child. "I think I'll call him."

"You go boo," she encouraged with a grin.

"What does that even mean ?"

"You're too old to understand !"

            She stuck out her tongue as she made her way behind the counter. He simply chuckled as he shook his head. This woman was impossible. He took his phone and dialled Alex's number.

" _Yeah ?_ "

"Hey Alex, do you have any plans for tonight ?"

" _Not really. I'm probably gonna watch a movie, why ? Do you have something in mind ?_ "

"Actually yes, I'm at the Chélie and there's stage where you can go sing. Wanna come ?"

" _Like a karaoke ?_ "

"Not really, you just perform and play an instrument. Lilibeth is going to sing."

" _Say no more,_ " Lin chuckled.

"Alright, hurry up though."

" _See you_."

          Lin tweeted some silly things before taking another drink. He could not help but notice how a lot of people were actually staring at Lilibeth. It was no real surprise, her beauty couldn't go unnoticed by so many men around. And even by some women.

        He couldn't help but grow jealous, which was ridiculous. She wasn't his, so how could he be jealous ? He had no right to be so. He had his perfect girlfriend all for himself. He wondered if Lilibeth was jealous of Vanessa because she was with him. Did she ever think of him at night when she was in his bed ? He shook his head. He shouldn't be thinking about that.

      He tried hard not to stare at her, but who was he kidding ? He wasn't even subtle about it. He was basically eye-fucking her like almost everyone in the room. How on earth did she not have a boyfriend ? He reminded himself to ask her about it someday.  
    While he waited for Alex to arrive, he enjoyed the show. Lin was surprised by the talent some people exhibited. Some did it by pure pleasure, others because they hoped to be noticed by someone that could start their musical career.  
    He definitely had to persuade Lilibeth to create a twitter account. She could share some covers and some songs she wrote.

"Hey !"

          He turned his head to see Alex.

"Hey, you made it," he smiled.

"Did I miss her?"

"Nope," he replied, popping the 'p'. "But I think it's going to be her turn any moment now."

"Do you know what she's going to sing ?"

"Nope."

"And do you know what you're going to sing ?"

"Alexander Hamilton."

"You're providing a sneak peek of your musical I see," Alex chuckled.

"I want you to play."

"So that's why I am here."

"You also said that you wanted to hear her sing again."

"That I do. We should do something with her Lin," his friend said. "I mean... the talent she has... It's incredible. It shouldn't go to waste. I think she deserves more than being a barista."

"Hey, I got a free drink !" Lin playfully remarked. "I'm fine with that," rthen, he sighed. "But you are right. We know the right people. We could produce her, what do you think ?"

"I think that's a good idea," Alex nodded in agreement. "Oh, there she comes."

           Lin gazed up to find Lilibeth on the stage. She took the mic in her hands and smiled.

"Well hello beautiful people. I just know how much you've been waiting for me tonight."

          A lot of cheers erupted from the crowed, making her laugh.

"Okay, that's not helping my modesty but thanks," people chuckled. "So I decided to perform a song from one of my favourite TV shows. Hope you'll like it."

          She sat on the piano bench and started playing. Immediately the room grew silent with anticipation, people meekly waiting for the first words that would come out of her mouth.

**_I'm high above the city_ **   
**_I'm standing on the ledge_ **   
**_The view from here is pretty_ **   
**_And I step off the edge_ **

"Isn't it from the TV show _Smash_ ?" Alex asked and Lin nodded.

"Yeah. I played in it," he chuckled as he started filming her.

**_And now I'm fallin', baby_ **   
**_Through the sky, through the sky_ **   
**_And I'm fallin', baby through the sky_ **   
**_It's my callin', baby_ **   
**_Don't you cry, don't you cry_ **   
**_And I'm fallin' down through the sky_ **   
**_Toward the street that I'm from_ **   
**_Oh, Broadway, here I come_ **   
**_Broadway, here I come_ **

          She looked so beateous on that stage. And when he managed to tear his gaze away from her he watched the crowd and he saw how entranced they were by her. He wondered if someone had fallen in love with her the way he had.  
          Did they just look into her mismatching eyes and did they give her their heart right away ? Did time just stop when they met her gaze ? Did they feel like every stars in their soul were collapsing every time she smiled ?

**_The pressure it increases_ **   
**_The closer that I get_ **   
**_I could almost go to pieces_ **   
**_But I'm not quite there yet_ **   
**_See, I've been bravin' crazy weather_ **   
**_Drownin' out my cries_ **   
**_I pull myself together_ **   
**_I'm focused on the prize_ **

    He knew it wasn't fair. It wasn't fair to Vanessa, it wasn't fair to Lilibeth. And yet he couldn't prevent himself from seeing her. He simply knew that he would be looking forward to every Friday night where she would perform.  
    He would get to see her on the stage, where she perfectly belonged. And when he would lay down in bed with his sweet Vanessa next to him, his mind would drift elsewhere.  
    Lilibeth was a young spirit at heart, the way she held herself, living like tomorrow wouldn't come was something Lin adored.

**_I'm fallin', baby_ **   
**_Through the sky, through the sky_ **   
**_I'm fallin', baby through the sky_ **   
**_It's my callin', baby_ **   
**_Don't you cry, don't you cry_ **   
**_'Cause I'm fallin' down through the sky_ **   
**_And it's a tune you can hum_ **   
**_Oh, Broadway here I come_ **

**_Mmmmmmmm_ **   
**_Will I remain the same_ **   
**_Or will I change a little bit?_ **   
**_Will I feel broken or totally complete ?_ **   
**_Will I retain my name when I'm the biggest, hugest hit?_ **   
**_Or will I blend in with the rest of the street_ **

    She could never not stand out in a crowd. Lin was sure of it. This song was perfect for her. Because it was a start. The beginning of her career. How come he didn't think of it ? Lilibeth was born to be on a stage.  
    It was where she needed to be. He could bring the stage to her. She could have a part in his musical. She said she'd only play in something that she really liked. And she knew that she liked his musical, she liked _Hamilton_ , she liked the songs.

**_The people all are pointing_ **   
**_I bet they'd never guess_ **   
**_That the saint that they're anointing_ **   
**_Is frightened of the mess_ **

**_But even though I fear it_ **   
**_I'm playin' all my cards..._ **   
**_Baby, you are gonna hear it_ **   
**_When I give them my regards_ **

    Yes... As chills and shivers run down his spine, Lin knew. He knew she would become a phenomenon and that she would have the world at her feet at some point. He knew she would be loved for what she was and envied for her wondrous talent.  
    She was born to be a star. And he was going to help her. Because that's what she deserved. She locked her gaze with his and she smiled.

**_I'm fallin' baby_ **   
**_Through the sky, through the sky_ **   
**_Now I'm fallin', baby through the sky_ **   
**_It's my callin', baby_ **   
**_Don't you cry, don't you cry_ **   
**_And I'm fallin' down through the sky_ **   
**_And I refuse to go numb_ **   
**_Oh, Broadway here I come_ **   
**_Broadway, here I come_ **   
**_Broadway, here I come_ **   
**_Oh, Broadway, Broadway, here I come_ **   
**_Here I come!_ **

"She's incredible," Alex whispered.

"Yes she is. And she's so much more."

**_And the last thing I hear_ **   
**_As the impact grows near_ **   
**_Is it a scream or a cheer?_ **   
**_Well, never mind, I'll never find out_ **   
**_'Cause Broadway I am here_ **

     The crowd erupted in loud cheers and applause. Lilibeth dramatically bowed, winking at Lin. She loved this feeling, people standing and cheering for her. Ever since she was a child, she'd adored singing.  
    And she knew that she couldn't wait for her first standing ovation. From what Lin told her, it is something you never forget and that you never get tired of, even years after.  
    Her heart was beating even faster when she saw how Lin was looking at her. He was going to be the death of her one day, that she knew.

    As for Lin, he was enchanted. In the way she sang, Lilibeth was everlasting. He had never thought he would meet the kind of woman you only find in books. When, late at night, his eyes fell on his beautiful V, his heart ached.  
    When did he stopp loving her the way he used to ? Of course, she always had a special spot into his heart, his Vanessa, but it had changed. His affections had shifted from her to the beautiful redhead. And the latter didn't even seem to notice.

    Surely she would tease him sometimes, she would kiss him on the cheek or hold his hands for a little too long. But he just knew that she didn't return his feelings. She cared about him, that he knew, she liked him yes, but love him ?  
    He wasn't so sure. Oh good Lord... How did he end up in this mess ? Who was he kidding, he perfectly knew how or when. Had he not used the subway on that day, had he been listening to his music louder, had he not heard her... He would be engaged by now.

"Hey Alex ! It's nice to see that you could make it !" she hugged him as a greeting. Typical French.

"Yeah. That was really amazing."

"Thanks," she chuckled.

"Did you know that I actually played in _Smash_ ?" Lin asked and she raised her eyebrows in surprise.

"Really ? Who ?"

"Well, I played myself," he grinned.

"How peculiar. I didn't notice you," she giggled. "But hey, wanna sing a song with me ?"

"Sure, which one ?"

"Don't laugh."

"I won't.," he promised.

"Mr. Brightside ?" he blinked. "What ?"

"I fucking love that song !" he beamed and she couldn't help but smile. "Let's go ! Oh please, please, please Alex, can you record this ?" he pleaded to his friend as he was handing him his phone. Alex laughed.

"Okay, okay."

           Lilibeth asked two men if they could play the song. By seeing how familiar she was with them, Lin concluded they were friends. As they settled, she turned to him.

"Are you ready ?"

"Absolutely."

"Feel free to dance ridiculously because that's what I do during that song."

"Don't worry, I'm on it," he promised.

**_Coming out of my cage_ **   
**_And I've been doing just fine_ **   
**_Gotta gotta be down_ **   
**_Because I want it all_ **   
**_It started out with a kiss_ **   
**_How did it end up like this?_ **   
**_It was only a kiss, it was only a kiss_ **

     Alex was surprised by how nice their voices sounded together. Of course he had already heard them sing together with _The world was wide enough,_ but there was no doubt anymore.  
    Yet Lilibeth's voice was more powerful than Lin's. She was gifted, that he was sure of. And when she was on stage, singing, she looked determined and self-assured. Like she owned the scene. If she was nervous, she didn't show it.

**_Now I'm falling asleep_ **   
**_And she's calling a cab_ **   
**_While he's having a smoke_ **   
**_And she's taking a drag_ **   
**_Now they're going to bed_ **   
**_And my stomach is sick_ **   
**_And it's all in my head_ **

    She dramatically put her hands on Lin's chest and he struggled not to laugh and mess the song. He was sure they both looked ridiculous but that was fine by him. There was no one else he would rather look stupid with.  
    Alex frowned, crestfallen, as he saw the two interact with each other. He was not blind. He could perfectly see what was happening here. And it pained him somehow. Because he knew Lin. And he knew where this situation could lead to.

**_But she's touching his chest now_ **   
**_He takes off her dress now_ **   
**_Let me go_ **   
**_And I just can't look, it's killing me_ **   
**_And taking control_ **

**_Jealousy, turning saints into the sea_ **   
**_Swimming through sick lullabies_ **   
**_Choking on your alibis_ **   
**_But it's just the price I pay_ **   
**_Destiny is calling me_ **   
**_Open up my eager eyes_ **   
**_'Cause I'm Mr. Brightside_ **

     From someone else's eyes, they were just two friends messing around but from Alex's eyes, there was more. He knew that ' _just friends'_ didn't look at each other like that. And he had never seen Lin like this.  
    He'd been friends with him for more than a decade. And yet, the look Lin had in his eyes was something Alex never encountered before. Not even when he saw Lin and Vanessa together.

     There was pure love and adoration written all over his face as his eyes were settled on Lilibeth. He looked at her in a way every woman dreamt of being looked at. He did notice how Lin had been behaving differently ever since he met Lilibeth.  
    But Alex understood why now. With her, Lin could be satisfied. Alex had to admit it, Lilibeth was the perfect match for Lin.

**_I'm coming out of my cage_ **   
**_And I've been doing just fine_ **   
**_Gotta gotta be down_ **   
**_Because I want it all_ **

     They both stood quite close as they were dancing, Alex almost thought they were going to kiss. But Lin knew where his boundaries stood. Even if the world seemed to disappear when it was only the two of them, he was aware of the people surrounding them and more especially of his best friend who was currently recording their petit numéro.

**_It started out with a kiss_ **   
**_How did it end up like this?_ **   
**_It was only a kiss, it was only a kiss_ **

**_Now I'm falling asleep_ **   
**_And she's calling a cab_ **   
**_While he's having a smoke_ **   
**_And she's taking a drag_ **

**_Now they're going to bed_ **   
**_And my stomach is sick_ **   
**_And it's all in my head_ **

**_But she's touching his chest now_ **   
**_He takes off her dress now_ **   
**_Let me go_ **   
**_'Cause I just can't look, it's killing me_ **   
**_And taking control_ **

     Alex tried to contain his laughter so that it wouldn't ruin the video, but man... It was hard with these two jumping around and doing weird gestures with their hands to emphasize the lyrics. He was glad that he had it on tape, because he truly needed to tease them with that in the future.

**_Jealousy, turning saints into the sea_ **   
**_Swimming through sick lullabies_ **   
**_Choking on your alibi_ **   
**_But it's just the price I pay_ **   
**_Destiny is calling me_ **   
**_Open up my eager eyes_ **   
**_'Cause I'm Mr. Brightside_ **   
**_I never_ **   
**_I never_ **   
**_I never_ **   
**_I never_ **

     Lin and Lilibeth were both laughing, holding hands as they bowed to the cheering crowd. Alex couldn't help but notice how they could make a nice couple. She was smaller than him yet she was the one who stood out on stage.  
     Lin was slightly behind her, as if to let her have the credit. He immediately noticed how Lin started at her when she wasn't looking. His eyes burned with a fierce admiration and adoration for her. It left Alex flabbergasted.  
    He knew Lin. He knew him all too well. And he knew what all of this meant. Heartbreak, hurt, pain. But he also knew what it could also lead to, if given a chance. Happiness, love, fulfilment.

_Oh Lin... What have you gotten yourself into ?_

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

Come talk to me on my [tumblr](https://tinywhim.tumblr.com/).

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a/n : Hello lovely people ! How are you ? I really love Mr. Brightside and as I was scrolling on instagram I actually saw a video of Lin lypsyncing it and I knew I had to write this. I mean, I really wanted them to sing a song together, and this one was perfect. Alex is so sweet and he caring, specially toward Lin. I liked writing through his eyes as he was watching both Lin and Lilibeth perform. I really enjoy writing this story, more than I thought I would. I first wanted to make this a twenty chapters story but there will be more than that I think. With the development of Lin and LIlibeth's relationship, I have so many ideas coming and I can't wait to put them into words. Not story related but last Friday I went to a concert to see Ed Sheeran. One of the best evenings in my life. Please, do tell me what you thought about the chapter !  
> love,  
> tiny.


	8. ONCE IN A LIFETIME

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lilibeth is offered something she cannot refuse. Yet, she is unsure. Lin is supportive.

      _What should I do ?_

_Where do I stand ?_

          _I'm getting myself into a mess I am not sure I can escape from. What should I do when the mistake is made ? Run ? Hide ? Fight ? But can I fight for something that is not mine ? Can I get to choose ? I don't want to be this kind of person. I've never been this kind of person. I've never wanted to be this kind of person. But with Lin ? I would bend heaven to make it shine inside his hands.  
          Could we be destined to be together but never to touch ? What a sweet tragedy it is, falling in love with someone who's already found their home in another's heart. All the time we spend together is never enough, Lin. I wish for more. I wish for endless sunsets with you. I wish for thousands of tomorrow shared with you. I wish for a life in which I could be satisfied with you. I wish for your eyes to be the first thing I see in the morning. I wish for your laugh to be the last thing I hear when I go to bed. I wish for a life with you Lin. But those wishes are not mine to make._

_What should I do ?_

_Put it into a song._

       Her heart whispered.

    A little bit of flirting was not cheating, right ? They had never crossed the line. Even if they were dying to, they never had. She wanted to blame Lin sometimes. When she thought about all these signals he would send her, perfectly knowing that he had someone waiting for him at home.  
    But she knew he meant no harm, he didn't want to hurt her. Deep down, he was just as smitten as she was. She just wished that Vanessa didn't exist. That nothing stood between them so they could be together.

    But it wasn't Vanessa's fault. She was the one who fell for him. Yes, he had a girlfriend, they there were in a steady relationship. But it didn't mean that she couldn't feel anything for him. If loving him was wrong then she didn't want to be right. Perhaps with time it would pass.  
    One day they would think of it was nothing more than a stupid little crush. But for now? She would simply suffer in silence and enjoy every moment she could share with him. That would be enough, for now.

    When she received a call from Lin, asking her to come to Philipp's café ASAP, she did not expect to find him with Alex and another man, which she had never met before. Lin seemed somehow excited about something while Alex and the man held themselves in a more... professional way.

"Hello," she greeted the three men.

"Hey !" Lin smiled. "Lilibeth, this is Thomas Kai. He is _Hamilton_ 's theatre director. And a dear friend."

"Oh, nice to meet you, Sir," she shook his hand, smiling.

"Please, no Sir," the man chuckled. "Just Thomas is fine."

"Alright, just Thomas," she smirked. "To what do I owe the pleasure ?"

"Well Alex and Lin told me a little bit about you and your voice. They say that you are very talented and that your voice is simply amazing."

         She nodded as a thanks, carefully listening to him.

"We're are actually taking _Hamilton_ Off-Broadway next year, but I am sure that we will be able to take it to Broadway the same year too."

"That's actually amazing !" she beamed, lighting up the whole room.

         Lin's heart fluttered.

"Lin, I am so happy for you ! I mean, I'm happy for you too Alex. The both of you worked very hard for _Hamilton_!"

         Lin couldn't help to be delighted when he saw how ecstatic she was for him and his project.

"That's the point. _Hamilton_ can't air in 2014, but in 2015 ? Hell yes," the Puerto Rican grinned.

"And what does it have to do with me ?" she finally asked, quite confused.

"That's the thing, Lilibeth," Thomas explained. "We want you in it."

          She blinked.

"Come again ?"

"We want you in _Hamilton_ ," Alex repeated with a smile on his face.

"But... I... I-I can't," she shook her head. "I have a job, and I mean... Singing on a stage..."

"Is exactly where you belong, Lilibeth," the curly haired man reassured. "We've seen you sing; you are made for this. You said that you wanted to be a singer, this is your chance. We believe in you. And we know that you can rock it."

"But... who am I supposed to play ?"

"My wife !" Lin beamed.

"Your... wife ?" she arched an eyebrow. "Elizabeth Schuyler ?" he enthusiastically nodded. "But isn't that... like a main character of the story ?"

"Yes she is. And it is what you deserve."

        She stayed silent for a couple of seconds.

"Can I... Can I think about it ?" she asked. "This is a lot to take right now and I just want to make the right decision. I don't want to rush into anything."

"Sure, just let us know by the end of next week alright ?" Thomas offered.

"Alright."

 

* * *

 

      The first thing she did when she came back home was to call her mum. She explained the whole situation and her mother told her to go for it. She knew how much singing was important for her daughter and that this was an opportunity to reach her dream.  
      It could be the beginning of her career. She loved _Hamilton_. She'd heard a lot of songs by now, thanks to Lin and without even know it she ~~became~~ a source of inspiration for the man when his pencil touched the paper.

       She really wanted to do it. But that would mean that she'd have to quit working at the Chélie, and she had grown to love working there. She had a lot of saving, so living on her own with just her _Hamilton_ salary would be alright. It would be such a big leap, a leap she had always wanted to take.

 

> **From Lin : Hey, you okay ? I was so sure that you were going to say yes...**
> 
> **To Lin : Yes I'm fine. I just have to think about it.**
> 
> **From Lin : Okay. I hope you'll say yes. :)  
> **

       Of course she wanted to say yes, but it was complicated. Playing as his wife on stage ? She knew that it shouldn't matter, because what was really important was the singing. But the acting... Truth to be said, she knew that she didn't really need to act. Could she really go on stage, sing to him, wear her heart on her sleeve, kiss him and pretend it was just acting ?

       She didn't need to pretend to be in love with him. And she perfectly knew it. She was scared that he might realize it. That he would notice how her cheeks would turn the colour of her hair every time he smiled, how her eyes would directly look for him every time she entered a new room.  
      Had least she had two things in commons with her character, her name and her affection for Alexander. She was so troubled that Tim worried about her when she was at work.

"Is everything alright ?"

"Tim, there's something I need to talk to you about."

"What is it ?"

"You remember Lin ?"

"You mean the man who spends every Friday night staring at you in a so uncatholic way ?" she rolled her eyes and sighed. "Yes I do. What is it ? Is he your boyfriend ?"

"No, silly," she chuckled. "I told you that he was a writer ? And he's working on a musical, and he actually offered me a part in it. A main characte," Tim's eyes went wide. "Alexander Hamilton's wife, Elizabeth."

"But that's incredible Lilibeth !" he exclaimed. "That's what you always wanted right !?"

"I didn't say yes."

"Now, why didn't you ?"

"Because I also work here. And I thought that I should talk to you about it before taking any decision."

"I see. That's very thoughtful of you, Eliza. And... I totally support you on that one," he smiled.

"I love this job..."

"You can still work here, you know," he replied. "As long as it's only rehearsals for now, you can still stay. We can try to arrange your schedule and shifts," he shrugged. "It wouldn't be a big deal."

"Really ?"

"Yes. Then, I know you'll be busy because you'll be performing and everything, but until then, you can keep your job here."

"Thank you Tim. You are the best."

"I know, I know," he wiggled his eyebrows, making her laugh.

"Do you think I can do it ? As Elizabeth Schuyler ?" she asked. Her voice was laced with hope.

"I am sure of it."

             She bit her lip, feeling the tears coming up.

"It's just that... I mean... performing every night ? It's going to be hard."

"Perhaps. But Lilibeth, you were born for this," Tim put his hands on her shoulders. "I've seen you on a stage, and this is where you belong. You are incredibly talented, and such talent should not go to waste. I know it seems scary, it probably is but it's definitely worth it."

"..."

"This is your dream, Elizabeth. This is why you came here. You said that you would only sing in a musical that you really liked. I know you love _Hamilton,_ " she nibbled her lower lip and nodded. "This is your chance. Maybe you won't have an opportunity like that again."

         She frowned, perfectly knowing that he was right.

"Alright."

"Alright ?" he grinned, making her smile.

"Alright."

 

* * *

 

"Lin ?"

" _Yes, V ?_ "

"I'm sorry to tell you this only now but I'll have to stay late tonight, I hope you don't mind."

" _Not at all, love. You need to work, I get it. You keep being clever,_ " she chuckled.

"Love you."

" _Love you too._ "

       Vanessa hung up and beamed when she saw Mike entering the room with two coffees. He was slightly older than her yet his beauty was left untouched by time. He had vibrant green eyes, perfect teeth always hidden behind a gentle smile.  
      Even though he was past thirty, his boyish features could always be found behind a smirk. The case they were working on was a hard one, but fortunately, her close friend was here to mentally support her and to actually help her. She had known Mike for many years and he was a talented lawyer. She was glad to have him beside her during this trial.

"How are you ?"

"Exhausted."

"Which is why I brought you coffee," he smiled and she couldn't help but melt.

"You're perfect."

"Now, that is a huge compliment, Miss Nadal. Be careful with that," she chuckled. "Now, are you ready to work ?"

"Definitely."

* * *

_My Dearest, Lilibeth,_

_This letter will never reach you and I am more than aware of it. But it needs to be written. You turn me into a mess of organized chaos every time your eyes touch my skin. I enter a room and look everywhere for you. Do you long for me like I long for you ? I hoped for this growing feeling to disappear but it is utterly stubborn. Day by day it grows bigger and bigger and I fear for the day my heart will explode and hurt everyone around me, including you and Vanessa._

_I never wanted this, but I guess that if you do feel something for me, you never wanted this either. I was told when I was a child that life isn't fair, it never is. I fight everyday against the odds and fate so that I can write my own way out, so that I can do what I want with my life. And yet, here you are, leaving me completely helpless in a way I have never been before. I wish with every fibre of my being that you will accept Eliza's part, because I know you would be utterly perfect for it._

_And if I have the chance of playing your husband, even if it's only for three hours on a stage, I would gladly take it. But do not believe for one second that I offered you the part because of my affections, even how deep they run. You got this part because you deserve it. I am thrilled to have the privilege to introduce you to the world. A star is soon to be born, Lilibeth. As soon as you accept this offer. Please, allow the world to catch a glimpse of your wondrous self._

_Remembering us the way we should be,_   
_Lin._

 

* * *

 

           When Lin received a call from Alex asking him to meet him in a café, he couldn't help but grow nervous. They didn't really talk since that Friday night at the Chélie and he sensed that something was off with his friend.  
          Didn't he like Lilibeth anymore ? Was it because she didn't accept their offer to be in the musical right away ? He was completely perplexed. Maybe he was simply overthinking, as usual. His brain was going to be the death of him, someday.

           He had watched the video of himself and Lilibeth that Alex had recorded while they were singing Mr. Brightside for what had seemed to be like a thousand times. Back then, he hadn't realized how close they actually were standing together.  
          But they did have a lot of fun. And the video of Lilibeth singing _Broadway, here I come_ ? He really wanted to post it on twitter but he knew he had to ask her first.

"Hey ."

            He gazed up to see his curly haired friend who looked rather serious.

"Hey, what's happening ?"

          He took a seat.

"Lin, I have a question do you mind ?"

"Shoot."

"What do you think of Lilibeth ?"

         That caught him off guard.

"She's a really good friend. Really sweet and passionate. Incredibly talented too," he replied with a small smile on his face. "Why's that ?"

"Wait, let me reformulate that. Do you like Lilibeth ?"

         A small frown appeared on Lin's face.

"Of course I like her, she's my friend."

"I'm not talking about liking her as a friend, Lin. And you know it."

"What are you even talking about Alex ?"

"You know that I love Vanessa, she's really sweet but I have never seen you look at her the way you look at Lilibeth."

       The Puerto Rican froze on his seat.

"What's that supposed to mean ?"

"I think you know."

"I...I..."

        Could he lie ? Could he lie to his best friend ? If he lied to him, where would he stop ? No he couldn't. He owed him an explanation. He sighed, defeated.

           "I don't know what to do... It's just that... Everything's changed. I don't understand how or why. I just... I can't be away from her. When I am, I feel... like there's something missing inside of me and that only her can fill the hole in my chest. I don't understand," he frowned. "I used to be happy and I love Vanessa. I was going to propose, you know ?" Alex raised his eyebrows in surprise. "The day I met Lilibeth was the day I was going to propose to Vanessa. I had it all planned. But then I saw her in the subway and I..."

"You fell in love with her," his friend realized. Lin nodded. "I never knew you were the 'love-at-first-sight kind of guy."

"I'm not. I mean... I wasn't. But then I saw her and I just knew," he explained, gesturing his hands around. "I've never felt this way for anyone before. Not even Vanessa."

"Then why are you still with her ? And not with Lilibeth ?" Alex calmly questioned.

"Can I really end a relationship that lasted for that long ? Just because of a fling ?"

"You and I both know it's not a fling, Lin. You are in love. Deeply so. And not with your girlfriend."

"I don't want to hurt her," he whispered.

"But if you keep on going, you will. And you will hurt Lilibeth too. They don't deserve this, Lin. You need to be honest."

"I was going to propose Alex ! Do you know what it means ? It means that our relationship has arrived to a turning point. I am expected to make a commitment."

"But do you want to ?"

       His friend only looked down and that was all he needed as an answer.

"I think that you have to make a choice."

"I still care about her. Maybe not the way I used to. But... I don't want to hurt Vanessa."

"I think you were bound to hurt her from the moment you laid your eyes on Lilibeth," Alex confessed. "When I saw the two of you singing together for the first time, I thought 'wow, what a great chemistry they have' but then I realized that it was more than that. That night at the Chélie... You'd have to be blind not to see what was going on, on that stage. I've never seen anything like it," he admitted, scratching the back of his neck. "And the way she looks at you is the same. Even if you both try to keep your face neutral; your eyes betray you. I mean... if Vanessa had been there that night, she would have guessed."

"But nothing happened between Lilibeth and I," Lin firmly protested.

"I know. But how long do you think you'll have to wait until something does ? Your relationship with her is a time bomb. And one that it's going to explode and hurt everyone around you. I think that you should just be careful in the future. Because if you play this game, Lin, you're going to hurt a lot of people. And I know that it is not your intention," the raven haired man explained. "Do you think it's a good idea to give her a part in _Hamilton_ ? Especially this part ?"

"She was born to be on a stage Alex, you've seen it, multiple times. You know it as much as I know it. She deserves it. And my feelings won't stand between her and her dream."

"Are you sure ?"

"Yes."

"So... what's your plan ? Regarding the whole situation."

"I... I just want to wait. See how it goes. Perhaps what I feel for Lilibeth will just disappear with time. And everything will go back to normal."

"Who are you trying to fool with your lie, Lin ? Me or yourself ?"

      Lin did not reply.

 

* * *

 

_Come talk to me on my[tumblr](https://tinywhim.tumblr.com/). _

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a/n : Hello dearies ! I actually managed to show Hamilton to my favourite boy and he quite liked it. It's funny how after all this time I still get super excited when the first song starts. I hope I'll never get tired of it. Anyway, here's a new chapter ! I quite liked writing it, we catch a small glimpse of Tim, who's always giving wise advises to Lilibeth. Alex is such a sweet person and I loved writing this little 'confrontation' about Lin's feelings toward Lilibeth. Because he's not blaming his friend at all, he just tells him to be careful. Do tell me what you thought about the chapter !  
> love,  
> tiny.


	9. THE SUBWAY GIRL

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lin introduces Lilibeth to twitter. Lin realizes something and writes a letter.

"So, have you made up your mind ?"

      Since Vanessa had decided, once again, to stay late at work, Lin had invited Lilibeth over. She had she asked him if they could see each other because she needed to talk to him about the proposition. He'd spent quite a long time cleaning the apartment, making sure there wasn't any clothes on the floor or dirty dishes.  
       He was quite nervous because he had no idea what her answer would be. When they had offered her the part in the café, he was sure that she was going to jump on it and say yes right away. When she didn't, he began to worry.  
       Alex had spent an hour reassuring him, telling him that she had her reasons and responsibilities. It did relieve him, but not that much. He had decided to prepare dinner. It was already late and he would always take an opportunity to dine with her.

"Yes," she nodded. "I'm going to take the part."

           His lips broke into a grin.

"Really ?"

"Yes."

"Really ?" he repeated just to be sure he wasn't dreaming.

"Yes !"

"Oh my god !"

         He took her into his arms and spun her around, making her laugh. Being in his arms felt like home.

"Aren't I the one who's supposed to be excited ?"

"Wait, I have every right to be excited ! This is the beginning of your career, Lilibeth !" he beamed and she felt her heart stop. "You're going to rock it ! I swear to god. You. Are. Going. To. Rock. It."

"It's amazing even I, don't put faith into myself as much as you do," she chuckled. "But Lin," she sniffled. "What is that luscious smell ?"

"Oh, that's just dinner," he scratched the back of his neck. "I prepared a little something. I figured that some roasted chicken and mashed potatoes would be fine for us tonight."

        When he saw her frown, her grew worried. She wasn't vegan, was she ?

"Is everything alright ?" she slowly nodded.

"Yeah. It's just that... I never got someone to cook for me. Except for my parents of course," she smiled. "It feels nice."

"You mean that your previous boyfriends never cooked anything ?"

"Nope. I was doing the cooking. I don't mind, because I really like it, but you know, after a long day, the only thing you want to do is rest, not cook," she shrugged. "I didn't know that you could actually cook, Miranda."

"I have learned to manage," he grinned. "But don't thank me too soon, perhaps you won't even like what I cooked."

"I'm pretty sure you're delicious," she waved her hand around.

           Then she blinked. And then he blinked.

           Did she really say what she just said ?

"I mean, I'm pretty sure it's delicious," she repeated, mentally slapping herself.

          What was wrong with her ? If she was lucky he would drop it.

"Oh so you think that I could be delicious ?" he arched an eyebrow, all smug.

         Nope he wouldn't drop it.

"C'mon on, you know I didn't mean it."

"Didn't you, now ?" he wiggled his eyebrows and it took all of her will not to smile.

        Perhaps she should play this game too. She knew how to play it, especially with him.

"You're right, maybe I did. Didn't I ?" she quirked an eyebrow and smiled seductively at him as she leaned in.

         His smile slowly faded as he looked at her, the fire of his admiration burning in his eyes. His heart almost left his chest when she pecked on his right cheek. Her lips were so sweet and warm against his skin.

"That's the closest thing to kissing me you can get, Miranda."

         She would set this rule. They could hold hands, they could hug, they could kiss as much as they wanted, as long as it wasn't on the lips. They would never cross the line. Friends could do that, right ? They could kiss, as long as it wasn't romantic. They could hug as well, right ?

"I'm content with that," he breathed and then leaned in to kiss her jawline.

            She closed her eyes and let a blissful sigh escape her lips. She could feel Lin smile against her skin. She wondered if he knew what he was doing to her. He must have known, right ? She knew that she was blushing, she knew how hot her skin felt. And he was currently touching her. He was too close to ignore her reaction.

"It's not really right, what we're doing."

"I know," he breathed, with his fingers tangled in her hair as he was kissing her cheek.

"We can't do it."

"I know."

"We're not going to do it."

        It sounded as if she was saying that to herself rather than to her friend. He tenderly kissed her cheekbone. Her breath got caught in her throat when she looked at him. He had such beautiful eyes. But when the emotions became too hard to bear, she avoided his gaze.

"Hum, we should..."

"Yeah the food is getting cold."

       The food was delicious, which wasn't a surprise for Lilibeth. She knew that Lin was an accomplished man and him being able to cook wondrously well did not startle her in the slightest. He asked her to join him into the living room, because he had something to make her listen to.

"It's all the _Hamilton_ soundtrack," he checked his watch. "It's not complete yet, because some songs are missing, but it's almost three hours long. Do you want to listen to it ?"

"Yes," she immediately responded, beaming. "Oh my God, am I actually ready for this ?"

"You can hold my hand if you need it." he joked but she immediately took it.

        He cleared his throat.

"Ready ?"

       The musical was the epitome of perfection. Every song was incredible and she already had some favourites. Once the last song was done playing, Lilibeth let out a breath she didn't know she had been holding.  
       Lin wiped the tears that rolled down her cheeks, his hand lingering on her skin. She blinked several times, trying to recollect herself. The whole musical was a lot to take in, especially when you listened to all the songs at once.

       But it was so well constructed. It told the story of Alexander Hamilton, his achievements, his misdeeds... His life hadn't been perfect, but it had surely been an adventure. From starting at the bottom to raising to the top, from a poor orphan to first treasury secretary... If his ascention was impressive, so was his fall.  
       Hamilton truly experienced the American dream, even though his end was tragic. Lin also informed her that Ron Chernow had approved of all the songs.

"It's... it's beyond words," she whispered. "What you have written Lin, it truly is a work of art," he smiled. "I'm serious. It's incredible."

"Thank you, Lilibeth. I'm glad you like it."

"I absolutely love it ! But..."

"Yes ?"

"There are quite a lot of swear words. Don't you think you should change that ? I mean... it would be nice if the musical was more child-friendly... No ?"

"Alex told me the same thing," he nodded. "I'm working on it. We are trying to work on all songs, change a few things... When we go to Broadways, we'll have to cut some songs from the production."

"Please, tell me that the Adams Administration stays," she hoped. "I really liked the rap in it."

           He shook his head.

"Nope, the song stays but not the rap part," she pouted.

"That sucks," he laughed."But yeah, that's a lot of songs."

"Don't worry, it'll only be 2 hours long or so, if we make it to Broadway."

"We will," she assured him. "I can't wait to play Eliza, though," she giddily admitted.

"Ha, can't wait to play my wife ?" he teased and she playfully slapped his shoulder. "Kidding. I can't wait to be on stage with you too, Lilibeth."

         They stared at each other for what seemed to be like an eternity, too many words left unsaid.

"Hey Lin ?"

"Yes ?"

"Could you help me sign in twitter ?"

"Say no more."

 

* * *

 

       Turned out that signing in twitter was a good idea. She had barely even started that thousands of people followed her on her first day. She should not have given her twitter to Lin when she saw that most of her mentions came from him.  
       She had actually uploaded her cover of _Broadway here I come !_ that she had sung at the Chélie. Lin had it all recorded and he told her that it'd be better if she were the one to post it on twitter. With her joining _Hamilton_ , people were thrilled and she received tons of sweet messages.

            She was glad to be almost thirty and able to handle her growing fame. She knew how unsettling it could be to receive so much sudden attention. But she was okay with it. She kept on twitting silly things and some poetry wrote, always leaving people waiting for more.  
            She remembered how she lost it when Josh Groban actually followed her and DMed her on twitter. She absolutely loved the guy. He complimented her and told her that he couldn't wait for her to air some songs. He also told her that he would definitely come to see _Hamilton_ on Broadway so he could see her on stage.

            Even though she had been casted as Elizabeth Hamilton, the rehearsals had not yet started. So she still worked at the Chélie. As they had agreed with Tim, she would keep her job until it was impossible for her to continue. Tim had been supportive and was delighted to know that she'd managed to do something that she liked. Knowing how talented she was, he knew that it was only the beginning of her ascendency.

            Lin had a karaoke night planned with the other people of the cast. She couldn't wait to meet them. From what she understood, Lin was friends with most of them and from what he told her, they were absolutely amazing. He told Lilibeth that they would love her right away.

          Lilibeth was on her way to go to the studio. The day before she had asked Alex to help her with a song she wanted to write and he immediately accepted. She was slightly nervous, because even if she liked it and worked hard on it, she never sang it to anyone else. She truly needed his help.

"Hello Lilibeth."

"Hi Alex," she grinned.

"How are you ?"

"Excited, to show you this. And a little bit... nervous I think ?"

"It's okay to be nervous when you present your baby for the first time," she chuckled. "The piano is all yours," she nodded and seated.

"Thank you."

         She took a deep breath and started singing.

        Alex was astounded. His eyes and mouth were opened wide. Her being able to sing was something, but being able to write something so astonishing and wondrous ? The song gave him chills. It made his heart bleed.   
       Those lyrics, those words, they weren't really his to hear. He perfectly knew who she was talking about in this song. He truly hoped that _he_ would be able to hear it.

        There was something with Lilibeth when she was singing that couldn't be put into words. One could think that after hearing her voice over and over again they would grow tired of it but no, it was quite the other way around. Alex longed to hear her voice, just like Lin, because her voice was a work of art. She was a human work of art.

"He will like it," he approved and she raised her eyebrows in surprise.

"You know."

"Of course I know," he chuckled. "I won't tell a soul."

"You're a saint, Alex."

 

* * *

 

       As for Lin, he had been so overjoyed by Lilibeth joining the cast that he hadn't spent a single day without texting her at least once. He remembered the night he had made her listen to all the _Hamilton_ soundtracks and he perfectly recalled how her eyes shone brighter than the moon in a summer night when she discovered his writing.  
       The first time he had heard her sing helpless, he had almost cried. Because he so wished that the words coming from her mouth as Eliza were actually coming from her, his lovely Lilibeth.

       Lin sighed as he was sitting on his desk. He knew he had to rewrite some songs and there were some songs missing. They still had time, but he had to hurry. He didn't really hhave time to rest. Overall, he was quite delighted to have convinced Lilibeth to join him on twitter.  
       He could post as many pictures of her as he wanted. People were sweet with her online and treated her like the queen she was. He couldn't help but smile when he scrolled on twitter. Lilibeth had just posted a selfie with Alex. They were both smiling brightly at the camera and we could see that they were seated on a piano bench.

 

> **@thesubwaygirl : Currently working on a song with this precious human being. Thank you @LacketyLac for the help.**   
>  **|**   
>  **@justafantasy : @thesubwaygirl @LacketyLac OMG. Queen. You look so beautiful. How are you even real ?**

          Now _that_ was a real question.

 

> **|**   
>  **@intheheights79 : Is it true that you are going to play in @Lin_Manuel 's new musical ?**   
>  **|**   
>  **@thesubwaygirl : @intheheights79 Yup ! I'm definitely excited and I am sure you guys are going to love it !**   
>  **|**   
>  **@lolaliggins : @thesubwaygirl @LacketyLac Is the song a part of an album ?**   
>  **|**   
>  **@thesubwaygirl : @lolaliggis For now, it's just a single. But I am working on an album. I hope it'll turn out well ! *fingers crossed***

            Lin already knew how talented Lilibeth was. She could play the piano, guitar, flute... He was curious about this new song, especially since Alex knew about it and not him. He felt slightly betrayed, not thinking that he could be left out by her.  
            So when he curiously texted her about it, she told him that he would hear it when it was time, when it was all done and polished. He was okay with that.  
           He sighed as he scribbled down his desk, that had lately become the stash for his most precious poetry. The poetry the world would never read. The poetry he shouldn't be writing. But he did anyway because his heart told him to.

_My dearest, Lilibeth,_

_It's been a month since I started writing these letters I know you will never read. These writings are an ode to you. It's all part of a book I could never write. You are everything I could ever wish for. A walking lucid dream. You're all my capital letters and my italic thoughts. I long for the day I will be able to take you into my arms and to press a kiss to your lips. Ever since I met you, my world turned upside down. The very same night I could not sleep for I knew that I would dream of your eyes. Did you know that blue and grey are my favourite colours ? How amusing is that ?_

_If only you knew how much I dream of you... It is so painful, which is why I refuse to sleep. Because you are here. Every time I close my eyes, you are here. And I do not know for how long I can take this. Your scent is driving me crazy. You are driving me crazy. And you don't even realize it. By being true, by simply being yourself, you make me fall harder for you. I know you never asked to end up in this situation, I never asked for it too. But it is the situation we are now in._

_I do not know for how long I can deny my growing affection for you. It should feel wrong, but loving someone has never felt so right for me. I know that I am already taken and that the choice to change this situation is mine, but I don't know how. I have been with Vanessa with such a long time... How could I break it off ? You are not aware of this, but the day I met you, I was actually going to propose._

_But then I heard you sing and saw your eyes and I knew that I was completely and utterly undone. Were you frozen in time like I was ? My heart invited you in before my mind could even process your name. And in there, you paid no rent. There is something behind your eyes, a tragedy I can see. Will you ever tell me about it ? Will you ever tell me your story ? Will you ever grant me the privilege of having you beside me whispering all your hopes and dreams ? Every time I look at you, Lilibeth, my soul calls for yours. Do you hear it ?_

_You take scientists and you turn them into poets. You take a barren land and turn it into the prettiest garden. Often I look into your eyes and I get lost, wondering about what our lives could have been if we were together. Would you play some piano for me, while I am writing some nonsense on the floor ? Would you sing with me in the shower ? I think you are the happiness I've always tried to reach._

_All these words are yours, Lilibeth and yours only. Perhaps one day, you will read them. But for now, I only confess to a piece of paper scattered away in a secret drawer hoping it will somehow find its way to you. Secretly hoping that one day, we will find out way to each other. In my heart you still stand tall. Oh I wish I could be yours. You make my heart do kick flips in a way that no skate park has ever seen. Believe me when I say that you are a poem with a heartbeat._

_Remembering us the way we should be,_   
_Lin._

 

* * *

 

"Who's that girl you posted a video on twitter, last time ?" Vanessa curiously asked as she was reading. "The subway girl ?" Lin smiled slightly, relaxing in their bed.

"It's Lilibeth, a friend. I met her in the subway, actually."

"She has a beautiful voice ! Is she a singer ?"

"Actually, we offered her the part of Elizabeth Schuyler in _Hamilton_."

"That's nice of you ! I'm pretty sure she'll rock it !"

"Yeah she will."

"And your show is going to be perfect."

"Hey, it's not even finished yet. Please do not put so much pressure on me," he pouted.

"I wouldn't dare," she grinned and Lin's smile slightly faltered.

          How come he didn't feel the same anymore when Vanessa smiled at him?

"C'mon here you," she straddled him and started kissing him passionately. "It's been a while, and since we are not THAT tired..."

          She caressed his body with her sweet hands and Lin closed his eyes.

"I love you, Lin."

"I love you too, V," he breathed, keeping his eyes closed.

      Why wasn't his heart racing like it used to ? He remembered the time he would get hard with only a few words from his Vanessa. But now ? Well... It had been quite a while since they had last made love. Probably weeks. They were always tired and didn't really have the time. But now that they did, Lin was perplexed.  
      He did want this, of course he did. But he didn't want it with her. He didn't want it with Vanessa. And he perfectly knew who he was thinking of when he was kissing his girlfriend. He parted away from her, gasping as he came to this sudden realization.

"Is everything alright ?"

"I'm... I'm sorry, I have to go out a little bit."

"What ? Right now ?"

"Yes, right now," he stood up, putting some sneakers and a hoodie.

"Are you alright ?" she asked him worriedly.

"Yeah, yeah I just need some fresh air. I'll be right back."

"Okay, be careful," she called out.

"What the fuck is wrong with me !?" he whispered, his head in his hand as he sat on the stairs outside the building. "What the actual fuck !? I can't do this. I can't mess this..." he kept on repeating.

           He couldn't, could he ? Lin had always been a man of honour. He liked to think that he was loyal. But was he really ? Was thinking about Lilibeth when he was in bed loyal ? Was wishing that he had Lilibeth in his arms rather than Vanessa loyal ? So far, he had not betrayed her trust. And he didn't really have any intentions to do so. But he felt so weak every time he saw his friend smile.

            How could his heart long like this for someone who was not his Vanessa ? He had thought he would never feel this way again. He had always thought that he was fulfilled with his girlfriend. When did he find himself in the same situation as Alexander Hamilton did almost three hundred years ago ?

            Perhaps it was only a phase. Perhaps he was going to get tired of her or bored and he'll just see her as a friend, that's all. Should he... Should he stop seeing her ?  _No..._ he couldn't do that. He cared too much about her  He would be hurt; he knew that for sure. And it would hurt her too. He had no right to take this decision without telling her first. What should tell her ? 

_Oh, I'm sorry Lilibeth, you I think it'd be best if we just stopped seeing each other because I'm totally in love with you but I'm also in a relationship with someone else._  

      How would she feel ? Would she be mad at him ? He would totally understand it, though. Would she have to leave _Hamilton_ ? No, impossible. She couldn't leave. He couldn't stand between her and her dream. She had always wanted to be in a musical and he was not going to take it away from her now that she had reached her goal. He couldn't be cruel. His feelings were his fault only. He just had to suck it up and get over it.  

       He sighed, tears running down his face. When did he become so helpless ? Why did he have to fall in love with her in the first place ? He had never really believed in love at first sight. He believed in a good and solid construction of a relationship that would later turn into a romantic passion. He believed in taking his time. Baby steps were fine. But love at first sight ? It sounded fairy-tale like. _Almost impossible to reach._  
      He was perfectly happy and life was easy before she came along. He didn't blame her for that, he could never. She was just there, singing, wearing her heart on her sleeve when he met her. No, he blamed himself, himself and his stupid little heart. His over caring, over loving heart.

_Bring me back._

      To when everything was normal.

_Bring me back._

      To when I only loved one.

_Bring me back._

      To when Lilibeth was just a voice in the subway.

_Bring me back._

      And not the love of his life.

 

* * *

 

**_Come talk to me on my[tumblr](https://tinywhim.tumblr.com/).  _ **

  
 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a/n : Hello darlings ! How are you ? I quite like writing this chapter, especially Lin's letter. There are more of those coming in the future, do not worry. I've been reading a fanfiction on AO3, called 'I f I had m y choice ' by semperpugnandi. It's an Alexander Hamilton/Reader fanfic and let me tell you, it's amazing. You should totally go and check it out. It's an AU and there's magic in it. Definitely worth the look ! What have you liked in this chapter ? I can't wait for you to read the next chapter. We'll learn a little bit more about Lilibeth and see her interact with the rest of the cast.  
> love,  
> tiny.


	10. THE WHOLE WORLD STOPS AND STARES FOR A WHILE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's karaoke night.

"C'mon Lin relax, she's coming," Daveed reassured the Puerto Rican. "She told you that she was running late."

       Indeed, she had. Ever since she had accepted to take the part of Elizabeth Schuyler, Daveed had been dying to meet her. He pissed Lin off until he would organize a meeting. They came up with this idea of a karaoke night.  
      The rest of the cast didn't hear her sing yet, and Lin couldn't wait to see their stupefied faces when the first pitch would escape her mouth. He almost felt like a proud parent showing off their child at a recital.

       They had not started the rehearsals yet but everyone was excited. Chris couldn't wait to meet this woman Lin talked so much about, From what he knew, Lilibeth was important to Lin. From what he had told him, they were good friends and she was the perfect person to play Eliza. 

"Yes I know, I know."

"You're quite excited to see her," Daveed noticed.

"Wait until you hear her sing, then you'll understand why," Lin chuckled and his friend couldn't agree more.

         Yes, Daveed had seen the video of her singing _Defying Gravity_ on twitter, and he had to admit that she was pretty incredible.

"Isn't it her ?" he asked, pointing at the red head who had just entered the room.

           He forgot his own name when his eyes landed on her.

"My my, she truly is gorgeous."

          Her hair was all curled into a braid, her royal blue dress perfectly matching with her fair skin and the colour of her hair. She surely dressed up. She looked beauteous.

"Yes ! Lilibeth !" he called out and waved so that she would see them.

          Their eyes locked and she beamed.

"Hello !"

"Lilibeth, this is Daveed."

"Nice to meet you Daveed !" she smiled.

"Bonjour, je m'appelle Lafayette," he greeted, kissing her hand.

"C'est génial ! Quelqu'un d'autre qui parle français ! Ça fait grave plaisir !" Daveed's eyes widened and fell on Lin, clearly looking for help. It almost made him laugh. "Lin ! I didn't know I wasn't the only French here."

"He's not French," Lin chuckled, amused by his friend's expression. "He's in his character, le Marquis de la Fayette."

"Oh, I see," she said, sounding slightly disappointed.

"You're French ?" Daveed asked and she nodded. "What did you say earlier ?"

"Oh, I say that it was nice to have someone else speaking French."

"You don't have a French accent when you're speaking, though," he realized, surprised. "Was it a mistake to portray Lafayette with a French accent ?"

"Not at all !" she beamed and he couldn't help but stare at her for a little too long. "I mean, I'm a linguist, so it's basically my job not to sound French when I speak. But I think it's a good idea you had, because like this, the audience will understand that Lafayette is French." Lin silently observed Daveed as the latter smiled. "I mean, your French accent is good."

"The 'r' are a little bit tricky though," he sheepishly admitted and she giggled.

"Yes, you're right. They're a nightmare for foreign people. I mean, French is a difficult language to learn," she explained, understanding. "I evenI question my ability to speak French sometimes, even though it's my mother tongue."

"Perhaps you could teach me some French ?" Lilibeth missed the frown that appeared on Lin's face and she grinned.

"That would be my pleasure. I'll totally teach you a lot of swear words."

"I'm counting on it !" he laughed. "Do you want something to drink ?" he offered.

"Yeah, I'll have a strawberry mojito," she nodded, playing with her hair.

          He was sweet.

"I got you," he winked and left her with the Puerto Rican.

         When she gazed up she noticed how unpleased he looked as he was watching Daveed leave.

"Is everything alright ?" she asked worriedly as she squeezed his hand.

            His chocolate eyes met her mismatching ones and his expression immediately changed. The corner of his lips twitched up, turning his frown into a smile.

"Yes, Lilibeth."

"You know Lin, I like it better when you smile," she admitted as she was looking around.

          How she could say such thing so casually was something Lin couldn't understand.

"I like it better when you smile too," he mumbled, hoping that no one around them heard him.

"Or when I sing."

"Or when you sing," he thought about it. "I really love hearing you sing."

"That is a nice compliment Miranda," she smirked, arching an eyebrow.

         She looked gorgeous. Did she even know it ?

"Anything for my dear Eliza," he dramatically bowed.

          She chuckled and he couldn't help but admire her. She was going to be the death of him someday. That made him smile.

"Lin, selfie !" she shouted out of nowhere and snapped a picture of the two of them.

"Wait, let me see it. I'm pretty sure I don't look good."

"Oh."

      Both of them grew quiet when they saw it. Lilibeth was beaming at the camera while Lin was watching her with a small smile, no mistaking in the feelings his eyes were displaying. The picture was great, but Lin's face confessed something he had never admitted in words.  
      His eyes went wide, as if he had just been caught red handed. It was a pretty picture, sure. But it could definitely be subject to 'misinterpretation'. Lilibeth's gaze fell on him with something in her eyes he couldn't pinpoint.

"Lin you..." she started before being cut off.

"There you go!" Daveed smiled, handing Lilibeth her promised drink.

           Lin and Lilibeth snapped out of it and both distanced themselves from one another. The Puerto Rican cleared his throat.

"I'm gonna see how Alex's doing," he quickly explained before leaving.

"Is everything alright ?" the curly haired man asked her as he saw her expression.

         She shook her head and faked her best smile.

"Yeah, I'm slightly tired but alright," she answered, her eyes never leaving Lin.

          His eyes were darting across the room trying not to focus on the red head. But when their gaze locked, Lin could see the questioning in her mismatching eyes.

_Lin, how could your eyes say so many things at the same time ?_

"Lin you should really be careful. You are not being cautious at all," Alex sighed as he took a sip of his drink.

"I'm sorry ?"

"There is no one you can fool with that look on your face."

"But I'm not even doing anything !" Lin protested, almost making his friend laugh.

"You're looking at her and that's enough."

"What should I do, Alex ?" the curly haired man could clearly hear the despair in Lin's voice. "What should I do ?"

"What does your heart tell you ?"

"It's not telling me anything," he frowned. "It's more like... it's whispering."

"Alright, and what is it whispering ?"

"That I should go and get her," he murmured, looking at her.

"Then perhaps you should. After ending things with Vanessa."

"Well she'd rather have fun with Daveed," he sneered as he observed his two friends laughing together.

          They seemed to get along.

"Your jealous side is showing Lin, be careful," Lin snapped his eyes at him.

"I am not _jealous_." He huffed.

"Really ?" he looked behind Lin where his two friends were. "Well, thank god, because with Daveed actually kissing Lilibeth I would have thought..."

"What ?"

             He turned his head so fast it made a loud noise, making him wince in pain. But the two were merely chatting.

"Ha ha ha, very funny Lacamoire."

"Ha, you love me."

* * *

"Lady and Gentlemen, please allow me to introduce you the King of Broadway, the national treasure... JOHNATHAN GROFF ! GROFFSAUCE !"

          They all enthusiastically clapped as the man who had just arrived dramatically bowed.

"Thank you, thank you. It is all nice to see you again. And I guess that you," he pointed at Lilibeth. "Are the famous subway girl ?"

"Yes. Are you playing in the musical ?"

"Replacement for King George III !" he smiled. "I'm also a friend of Lin and he asked me to be here tonight. He wanted me to meet his new wife."

        That caught her off guard.

"I'm sorry what ?"

"You play Eliza Schuyler, don't you ?"

"Oh, right. Yes. Sorry, that came of weird," she chuckled.

"Is it your first musical ?" she slowly nodded.

"Yes. And I should be terrified, but oddly, I am not," she admitted, sheepishly.

"You're not terrified now," he replied. "But wait until you have to perform your first show, hundreds of people in the theatre, waiting for you to come on stage. And once you're there, you have the spotlights almost blinding you, but if you're like Lin, you can see the first few rows. And from that moment, it's just adrenaline pumping in your veins."

"Woah," she breathed, goose bumps on her skin. "But what if I mess up ?"

"Simply don't," he shrugged and laughed when he saw the glare on her face. "I'm kidding, pretty face. Always try to catch up. If you miss a few words, that's alright, it's not the end of the world. Plus, you're not on Broadway yet, you have time. Plenty of time to learn your lyrics," she nodded.

"You're used to this, aren't you ?"

"You mean, you have never heard of me ?"

"Nope."

"Now I'm wounded," he frowned, faking offence as his hand went to his heart. She laughed.

"I'm not from here," she explained. "I'm French. And in France, well, from where I come from, we don't really care about Broadway and that kind of stuff. I didn't even know Lin before I met him."

"Really ?" John was surprised. "He's quite famous around here. How did you two meet ?"

"Didn't he already explain you ?" Lilibeth asked, confused.

"Oh, that he did, but I'd like to have your version of this story."

"Ha ha ha you make it sound so important," she chuckled.

"Well, you never know how important a meeting with someone is until they become the main character in your life," he replied and she couldn't agree more.

"Well I was singing in the subway and once I was done, Lin complimented me and offered me to grab a cup of coffee," Johnathan smirked as if he knew something she didn't. "We talked a lot, especially about Alexander Hamilton. And I guess that we sort of clicked," she shrugged. "He's really a nice and interesting guy."

"That he is," John nodded in approval. "Oh look, Lin is announcing something," he pointed at the Puerto Rican.

"Okay guys, this is not your average karaoke night," Lin began. "This is a bounding night. This is a part of Hamilton cast having fun and meeting the new girl. It will involve a lot of drinking, a lot of singing and a lot of eating. Guys, the only rule tonight is to have fun !" they all cheered. "Now, please, let us begin ! With our general, George Washington !"

         Lilibeth laughed as Chris got up on the stage and started to sing a Britney Spears song.

       Oh boy, that was going to be fun. During the whole evening, Lilibeth managed to get everyone's phone numbers. Daveed seemed rather pleased to give her his. He couldn't wait to learn some French, that was what he told her. Lilibeth was surprised to learn that Renée had two children, Benjamin and an adopted one, Brielle. Lilibeth liked the name. It reminded her of a song.

       She got to learn a lot about everyone and every single person she came across spoke of Lin with great respect and admiration. It was heart-warming to see how loved he was by everyone he came across. She didn't lie to Johnathan, Lin truly was nice and interesting.  
      She remembered the night at his flat, where he had made her listen to all the Hamilton songs. She had loved every single one of them. And the fact that it came out of his brain was remarkable and stunning.

       She quickly noticed how Jasmine and Anthony seemed rather close. Surely, they were engaging a conversation with everyone else, but during the night she would often find the two of them merely talking and laughing, their hands always too close. She smiled, they were cute.

     She lost it when she met Leslie because he was in one of her favourite shows, _Smash!_ He played Sam. When she spoke with Leslie she learnt that he was married, had been married for almost three years.  
      He explained her that he had met Nicolette while they were auditioning. She couldn't help but find it romantic. Leslie couldn't help but be pleased when she admitted that _The room where it happens_ was one her favourite songs.

       Chris did spend a lot of time, when they weren't singing, showing silly pictures of Lin he had taken over all these years. She had made him promise to send her some, because she knew that if she felt down, she just needed to see a goofy picture of him and everything would be okay again.

       Overall, the evening was pleasant. She did sing a lot of songs, with a lot of people and all of them were utterly amazed by her voice. Lin told them that it was no joke and that he meant every adjective he had used to describe her and her singing. At some point they also sang Hamilton songs.  
      By this time, Lilibeth had almost learnt them all by heart. They all killed it with _My shot_. So when Renée offered her to sing _Satisfied_ , she HAD to do it. It was one of her favourite songs. Because it somehow reminded her of herself. Lin actually sang his part with them.

_**Handsome, boy does he know it!** _

_**Peach fuzz, and he can't even grow it!** _

_**I wanna take him far away from this place then I turn and see my sister's face and she is** _

" _ **Helpless...**_ " Lilibeth sang as she looked at Lin with pure adoration written on her features.

_**And I know she is** _

" _ **Helpless...**_ "

Lin hoped it wasn't just acting.

_**And her eyes are just** _

" _ **Helpless...**_ "

Alex knew it wasn't.

_**And I realize three fundamental truths at the exact same time** _

"Girls that was incredible," Chris clapped as they finished the song. "Lilibeth I can't wait to see you on stage," she chuckled.

"I can't wait to see all of us on stage, with our costume and the instrumental," they all nodded in agreement. "It's going to be absolutely fantastic," she looked at Lin. "And the fact that you wrote all these songs by yourself ? It's awe-inspiring I swear."

      Lin almost blushed.

      Lilibeth was overexcited to be able to sing some Ed Sheeran songs. She really loved the man and she had been able to see him perform in a pub in London, back in 2011. She was told that he might come to America for a tour and she definitely planned to buy some tickets. Jasmine told her that she liked the guy too, she'd be delighted to go to a concert with her.

"Oh Lilibeth !" Anthony called. "You never heard Daveed rap gun and ships, right ?" she slowly shook her head.

"This is a spectacle to behold !" Chris laughed. "Allow us to show you."

       It was indeed quite impressive. And quite amusing, knowing that at the beginning Lafayette was struggling with English and by the end of the first act, he was the one with the fastest rap.  
      Daveed seemed clearly pleased by Lilibeth's reaction, especially when she patted his back as a congratulation, much to Lin's dismay. She truly was impressed by his speech. I mean, how could someone speak so fast ?

"But you managed to understand everything he said ?" Chris curiously asked her.

          He seemed quite impressed by her English, now knowing that she was French.

"Yup," she proudly nodded.

"How come ? I mean, even for me sometimes it's hard;" he chuckled and she joined him.

"Well, that's because I've been studying English, and I mean, seriously studying English for more than twelve years. I have a doctor's degree with a major on American history and also one on translation studies."

"You mean you have two PhDs ?" she nodded.

"Yes, in my university, it was possible to have a double Major. But it was incredibly hard. Yet, I managed. I didn't leave my room for four years, never had free time, but hell yeah, I did it !" she laughed.

"You mean you had to write two theses at the same time, right ?" she nodded.

"Yup."

"That's pretty impressive," Chris nodded in approval. "I mean I've never met anyone that clever," she chuckled.

"It was hard. I had to work twice as hard as everyone. I didn't want to have my first doctor's degree and then my second. I wanted them both at the same time. But my academic results have always been good. So I was allowed to give it a try. Sure, now I have a good records, but I suffered a lot during this time. I almost didn't make it," she admitted, her eyes wandering off for a moment. "But then I got my shit together and did it."

"You go gurl !" Renée raised her glass at her, making her giggle.

"How come you have this talent for music ?" Leslie asked her.

"Oh that ?" she chuckled. "I owe it all to my mother. She was a piano teacher and she could sing well too. I learnt piano before walking. My first word was 'piano'."

          Alex's eyebrows met his hairline.

"Really ? I never knew you were THAT good with a piano."

"Well, being the daughter of a composer has its perks."

"A composer ?" she nodded. "Known ?" she hesitated and then nodded once again.

"Wait, your last name is Williams ?"

"Yes."

"What's your mother last name ?"

           She looked at him for a couple of seconds.

"D'Angers."

           His eyes grew wide and he stood up.

"Are you kidding me !?" she chuckled and shook her head.

"What ? What is it ?" Johnathan asked, confused.

"Your mother is Catherine D'Angers !?"

"Yes," she nodded and wanted to laugh because of her friends' confusion.

"What is happening ?" Renée questioned, clueless.

"Her mother is Catherine D'Angers !" he repeated.

"And my mother is Luz Miranda," Lin retorted, his arms crossed over his chest. "I don't see how it's revelent!"

"No, no, no, you don't understand !" he shook his head. "Catherine D'Angers is known for being one of the most talented pianists in the world. And you," he looked at Lilibeth, realization dawning on his face. "You are THE little prodigy. Catherine's daughter. I've heard so much about you. Everyone in the music industry heard about you. You're a better pianist than me," she smiled sheepishly, slightly blushing. "I feel betrayed," he laughed.

"No way, you think she's better than you ?" Lin asked in astonishment. "But I know no better pianist than you !"

"Well now you have Lilibeth !" the man said, pointing at the redhead. "It is said that she had her first competition when she was three years old and she won. She's a little Mozart."

"Is that true ?" Lin asked her and she nodded. "I feel betrayed too," he whispered, making everyone else laugh.

"I understand now, why you are so good with music. Because you're the little prodigy," Alex smiled.

"Please, don't call me that, I never really liked it."

"Why did you never tell us about it ?" she shrugged.

"I never thought it was important," she honestly answered. "I mean, you are all talented, right ? I just happen to be the daughter of a celebrity in the music industry, well more like classical music industry."

"But music industry nonetheless."

"Now I see that you are a woman of many talents, Miss Williams," Daveed teased, wiggling his eyebrows.

"And you haven't seen anything, Mr. Diggs," she shot back, smirking. "There are other things I can do."

"Wow wow wow, take a room guys !" Leslie shouted. "There are children here !" he said, pointing at Anthony and Jasmine who seemed completely unfazed by the world around them.

"Oh I don't know, maybe we will," the curly haired man replied, making her arch an eyebrow.

          Lin looked at her expectantly. Surely she wouldn't...

"Maybe we will."

       Lin's heart dropped to his stomach. Of course. He should have seen it coming. Every time his eyes would fall on Lilibeth, Daveed wouldn't be too far. They had talked a lot during this evening and spent most of the night together.  
      At first he didn't really mind, he was quite happy that she was able to make friends with the people she was going to spend a lot of time with during the following months. But he could see the way Daveed looked at her. He clearly was interested. He could relate, he was attracted to Lilibeth too.

       He could see the way Daveed smiled whenever Lilibeth spoke, or how he would always try to brush pass her to feel a little bit of her skin. He was not blind. And so was Alex. His friend had not stopped looking at Lin all night, clearing sensing that something was wrong.  
      But Lin was a good actor, he could always hide well his emotion. Even if it killed him inside. He could clearly see that Lilibeth was pleased with Daveed's attention on her. He did not like it.

      And even if he didn't really want to admit it, Lin had no say in it.

* * *

 

**_Come talk to me on my[tumblr](https://tinywhim.tumblr.com/)._ **

****

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Come talk to me on my tumblr. 
> 
> a/n : Hello ! I had so much fun writing this chapter, I swear. I had to actually stop myself because I was ready to write 2 000 more words, but I mean, the chapter is already long enough and I didn't want to make two chapters on a Karaoke night. We got a little more of Lilibeth's personal life tonight. I really loved Alex's reaction toward her parentage. Now Lin might experience in the future what Lilibeth has to go through when he comes back to his Vanessa at the end of the day. I'm not sure he'll react the same though. What did you think of the chapter ? By the way, I submitted my fanfic to the wattys 2019, on wattpad ! I'm so excited, it's my first time ! I hope it'll go well.  
> love,  
> tiny.


	11. THE GHOST OF THE PAST

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An anniversary is right around the corner. Lin is there to catch Lilibeth when she falls.

_Lilibeth remembered the hushed whispers, the crimson ears and the clothes scattered around her parents' room. She had gotten out early from college that day because her teacher had been missing. She was delighted because she was supposed to go to the restaurant with her father tonight._   
_With her mother being away on a business trip, her father had promised her to go out, so they could share some time together. She'd been busy with her exams coming up and she was quite stressed._

_The house was completely silent. She didn't mind, she loved the quiet. Since her father was still at work, she had the time to take a quick shower and to pick up a nice dress for the restaurant. Her father liked to take her to fancy places, telling her that his princess deserved only the best. She frowned when she heard some noise coming from upstairs._

_Barefoot and thus, completely silent, Lilibeth headed to her parents' room, where the noises were coming from. The door was ajar and she froze when she saw the scene before her. Her father was getting quite intimate with a woman, who was definitely not her mother._

_"Charles regarde !" the woman shouted when she stopped the red head. (Charles, look !)_

_The man turned his face and froze.  
_

_"Lilibeth !"_

_She ran and ran, ignoring her father's cry. The tears were already rolling down her cheeks, blurring her view. How could he do this ? She had always thought that their parents were relationship goals, the perfect couple that everyone dreamed to have as child._   
_Is it why he stayed late at work ? Is it why she didn't see him coming back from work until two AM, when she was studying ?_

_"Lilibeth laisse-moi t'expliquer s'il te plait." (Lilibeth please let me explain...)_

_"M'expliquer quoi !? Que tu baise quelqu'un d'autre que maman !?" (Explain me what ? That you fuck someone who is not mom !?)_

_"Lilibeth ce n'est pas comme ça..." (Lilibeth it's not like this...)_

_"Mais qu'est-ce qu'il t'a pris !? Comment est-ce que tu as pu faire ça !? A maman ? A moi !? Aux jumeaux !" she screamed, ignoring the warm water escaping her eyes. (What were you thinking !? How could you do this ? To mom ? To me ? To the twins !?)_

_"Je ne savais pas..." (I didn't know...)_

_"Dans notre propre maison !?" (In our own house ?)_

_"Lilibeth s'il te plait laisse-moi t'expliquer," he pleaded, his eyes begging her to let him speak. (Lilibeth, please, let me explain.)_

 

_It made her heart ache. But she let him.  
_

 

* * *

 

       The infamous day was coming close. And she didn't feel well at all. She would always grow anxious and tired during this period. She couldn't wait for this month to be over. She tried to think about something else. She learnt all of _Hamilton_ 's songs by heart, she worked even harder on her own album.  
      She was glad that Alex was here to assist her. She also wanted to write a song with Lin. When she told him about it he was beyond excited and couldn't wait to work on it. _We're going to create magic, Lilibeth !_

       She talked a lot with Daveed as well. He was so sweet and they really got along. Lilibeth knew that he was attracted to her, he did not hide it. She had to admit that the man was charming and despite her best efforts, she grew fondly attached to him. Yet she couldn't help but feel guilty at the same time.  
      Was it right for her to like Daveed with all the feelings she had for Lin ? But Lin couldn't be hers, yet Daveed could. He was hers to take if she wanted to. She was so lost  

      What should she do ? She didn't want to wait for Lin to come around, she had no idea how long it would take. He'd be worth it, of course he would be, but still. They'd known each other for quite a while now... if he had really wanted to be with her... he would be hers by now, wouldn't he ?  
      And she couldn't just ask him to end his relationship just for her. It wouldn't be fair to Vanessa. The poor girl didn't ask for anything.

"What are you thinking about ?" Jasmine asked her as she took a sip of her drink.

           They had decided to go to the mall to have an afternoon shopping together. Being close by age, Lilibeth and Jazz tended to hang out a lot together.

"Boys ?"

"You're the one telling me that ?" Lilibeth smirked. "I bet you were thinking about Anthony."

"I'm too tired to protest. I adore the guy."

"He is cute."

"Cute ? Bitch please, he's perfect," she sneered, making the redhead laugh.

"Alright, alright."

"But no, really, what's with that face ?" she questioned, worried for her friend. "You look... well... sad ? I'm not even sure that's the right word to use."

"Oh it's just... My father's birthday is coming up soon."

"Oh I get it, since he's in France, you won't be able to see him ?" Lilibeth looked away.

"Yeah, something like that..." she cleared her throat. "Anyway, I need new shoes, you can help me with that ?"

"I got you, fam."

       Lilibeth really enjoyed Jasmine's company, the girl was sweet and completely over the heels for a certain Anthony Ramos. She explained that she waited for Anthony to ask her out, but Lilibeth told her that she could be the one making the first step.  
      Jazz wasn't sure about all of this, because she had never asked anyone out before, it was always the guy who came first to her. But it could be the time for some changes.

       The rehearsals were coming closer, Lilibeth's number of followers on twitter grew day by day, (Jaz even made her create an Instagram account, telling her that a pretty face like hers wouldn't go unnoticed on this app) and everything was fine. There were even some people who actually wanted to sign a contract with her. She wanted to talk about it with Lin before taking any drastic decision.

       Plus, she had _Hamilton_ for now. She couldn't sign a contract and then disappear. She loved _Hamilton_ , she really hoped that they were going to make it to Broadway and that she'd perform it for years.  
      As for her personal album, she only had a couple of songs ready. She was not really worried, she knew that these things take time. It wasn't like she had to air an album by the end of the year. At least, with all her inner conflicts; she did have a lot of material to work on.

      She couldn't help but think of Lin. Why had fate decided to play such a trick on them ? Why would fate make it feel as if they were meant to be ? Were they destined to be together but never to touch ? Or were they destined to touch but never to be together ?  
      In any way, they were a tragedy. She couldn't shake the bittersweet feeling away. Beautiful Lin who could never be hers. Was it too much to ask ?

      When she had arrived in New York, she had been full of dreams and hope. She thought she could find love. And she did. God, she did. But why him ? Why now ? If only she had met him earlier. If only he didn't have a girlfriend.  
      But despite this rather unlucky situation, she couldn't help but admit that it was fate that brought Lin into her life. They could have never met. Had she not been singing this day in the subway, had he not heard her...

      The chances of them meeting were incredibly slim yet it happen, and Lilibeth knew that it had to mean something. Were they destined to be friends longing to be more ?  
      Did his affections toward her ran as deep as hers ? She could only hope. But she couldn't help but wonder. If Lin shared her feelings, wouldn't he be with her by now ? Who could deny what they shared ?

      She shook her head, chasing these thoughts out of her mind. She swallowed hard as she looked at the neon sign of the pub. She shouldn't do it. She should go home and watch a movie and just forget about it.

_That's what I said last year too._

      She clenched her fists so tightly her knuckles became white. _Go._ She wanted but at the same time, she didn't. _Go._ If only he were here... _Go._ She took a deep breath and entered the bar.

_What could actually go wrong ?_

 

* * *

 

_My dearest, Lilibeth_

_What are your dreams made of ? Do you see me in them ? If we ever dream of the same place, do you think we could meet there ? You haunt my days and nights, Lilibeth. Everything about you screams desire and love. I can see it in your eyes that something is troubling you. I wish I knew what it was, so I could be the shoulder you need to cry on. Seeing you like this is killing me, love._

_I do not know what tomorrow is made of, but I surely hope that it is made of your eyes and your smile. I long for your touch, I crave for your embrace. Allow me to have a little bit of the taste of your lips and I will be the happiest man on earth._   
_Allow me to show you the depth of my affection, for one day. Allow me to sweep you off your feet and carry you into a better future. Love is not the word I am looking for, for my affections toward you are greater than this four letters word._   
_Could I learn my way around your heart like my favourite playground ?_

_Do you-_

       Vanessa was asleep and Lin was in his office. Today had been a rather busy one and yet he couldn't find sleep. He was in the middle of writing one of his letters when he received a phone call from Lilibeth.  
      He frowned when he saw how late it was. If he recalled correctly, she wasn't working today, so there were no reasons for her to be up this late. Worried, he immediately picked up.

"Hello ?"

" _Liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiin ?_ "

"Lilibeth ? What's happening, are you okay ?"

" _Liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiin tu me manque !_ " _(I miss you.)_

"Okay okay are you drunk ?"

" _Non_." ( _No_.)

"Yeah, I bet you are," he sighed and rubbed his eyes. "Where are you ?"

" _I don't know,_ " she admitted. "I'm in a bar."

"Which one ?"

" _I don't know_."

"Alone ?"

" _Yes,_ " he groaned.

"Can you give your phone to the bartender please ?"

" _But what if he steals it ?_ " she whispered as if she was telling a secret.

"I promise he won't."

      After being able to get her location, Lin quickly dressed up and left the flat to find her. How reckless was she ! Didn't she know that a woman shouldn't be drinking alone in a bar ? Especially in New York ? What was she thinking ?  
      She could get hurt ! Or worse ! He knew very well how dangerous streets at night were for women. Oh, he already knew how he was going to lecture her.

      He couldn't stop his heart from beating fast in his chest as he was in the vehicle. He was so scared for her. What if something happened to her ? He really hoped that she was unharmed. He shivered when he got out of the cab, the cold embracing him like an old friend. He frowned when he saw her outside.  
      She was sitting on the ground, her hair was a mess and she had a cigarette between her fingers. She was wearing her glasses as well.

"You smoke ?"

"Heyy Lin. Nice to see you. How did you know I was there ?"

"You called me, Lilibeth," he sighed and helped her to get up.

           He tossed the cigarette on the ground and he ignored her complaint.

"What are you even doing here ?"

"I'm celebrating a birthday."

"Is it your birthday ?" she frowned and shook her head.

"No, it's not."

"Then who's ?"

           She looked down and swallowed hard.

"It's my father's birthday today."

"That's nice," he said as he was looking around. At least, they were still in the Heights. "How old ?"

"He would have been 53."

"Is he...?" she nodded. "I'm sorry."

"It's not your fault, you weren't there."

"What... Do you want to talk about it ?"

"Do you want to listen about it?" she asked right back.

"As long as you are comfortable with sharing your past with me," he nodded.

            She stared at him for a couple of seconds.

"Can we go home ?"

        Her small voice reminded him of a child.

"Sure thing, what's your address ?"

       Lin was glad that she was actually able to walk, because he wasn't sure he could carry her all the way to her flat. He took his time to take the whole place in, delighted that he finally saw something new concerning her.  
      His eyes lingered on the music sheets scattered on the couch, where laid a keyboard and a guitar. If he squinted hard enough, he could spot some poems written on them too.

       He didn't know what to expect when he entered the flat yet it felt as if it was everything he would have thought of. It was well organized and cleaned. Quite small yet cosy. He spotted a Nintendo GameCube plugged into her tiny TV screen and he couldn't help but smile. They had to play, at some point. He just hoped she had Mario Kart.

       It made his heart ache knowing that she lived in something so small, barely two people could fit in. She deserved so much more. He understood her when she complained about her flat and that she couldn't wait to get another one. He couldn't help but wonder.  
      Would she like his flat ? It was big enough. He shook his head. _No Lin, you can't say that._ He really hoped that _Hamilton_ was going to work, so that she might be able to move out.

      Lilibeth didn't let go of his hand when she grabbed a glass of water, telling him that she liked it better this way. He didn't know how he did not kiss her at that precise moment. Probably because she was drunk and that he didn't want to take advantage of her. Even if she asked, he wasn't sure he would.

"What happened, Lilibeth ?" he finally asked.

         She struggled to take off her jacket so he helped her.

"Come to bed with me."

         He blinked.

"I'm sorry what ?"

"I want to lay down in my bed with you," she leaned in and then whispered. "My head is spinning so I don't think I should be standing that much."

"Oh dear God."

         She slumped into his arms, laughing.

"I'm so sorry I'm heavy."

"You're not," he replied as he laid her down her bed.

"Wait, I have to get changed."

"Okay I'm just going to go and oh my god please don't undress right now I'm still here."

"I can't do it, I'm too drunk," she whined with her head stuck in her shirt. "Can you help me, Lin ?"

       He had to refuse

"Please ? Pretty please ?"

       His resolve crumbled and he nodded.

"Alright, come here."

         He sat on the bed with her and took off her shirt. His breath got caught up in his throat when he saw the sexy black lacy bra she was wearing. _No Lin, focus._ But his eyes wondered on her plump chest for a little too long.

"Lin, my pants," she reminded him.

"Yeah sure."

      How did she even manage to put these skinny jeans on ? They were so tight ! And Oh, her panties were matching the bra. _Focus Lin_. He decided to stare at her face so that he wouldn't get distracted by her warm body. But oh boy, that was not a good idea either.  
      Her cheeks were all flushed, probably because of all the liquor she had drank tonight, her pouty lips slightly parted as she was observing him with her big doe eyes. The way she looked at him made him want to do... well, her.

"Lin ?" she softly called.

"Hum ?"

"Are you going to have sex with me ?"

        He blinked.

"What ? No !"

"Don't you want to ?" she asked, her head leaning on the side, quite confused.

_Yes._

         Her whole body was an invitation he was dying to accept. He silently shook his head, his nails digging into his palms. He didn't trust his voice. Why did she make it so hard ? Why did she make him so hard ?

"Oh, I thought you wanted to," she simply replied, sounding disappointed.

          Of course he wanted to take her right now. He would have if he didn't...

"I have a girlfriend," he said, more to himself than to her.

"And yet here you are," he frowned.

"You're the one who called me. I came here to help you because you are my friend."

"Mais moi je ne veux pas être ton amie. Je veux être plus que ça."

"What was that again ?" he asked, clueless.

           Did she say something about friends ?

"I asked you to give me my pyjama," she lied. "It's on the floor, next to the wardrobe."

          He quickly got up and picked them, trying to shake the tingling feeling in the lower part of his body.

"I'm sorry."

"For ?"

"Asking you if you wanted to have sex with me. I shouldn't have."

"That's alright, it's probably the chemical in your blood speaking," he reassured and she smiled when she realized that he wasn't mad at her.

            He could never be mad at her.

"Are you going to lay down with me though ?"

"Do you want me to ?"

"Incredibly so."

        He sighed and settled down with her. She quickly rested her head on his chest. She pretended to ignore how his heart was racing. She could grow used to it.

_But you shouldn't._

"Do you want to tell me about it ?"

           She stayed silent for so long he thought she had fallen asleep.

"I always was a daddy's girl, you know ? You know sometimes they say that girls are closer to their father. I guess it was like that for me."

"What happened ?"

_"Lilibeth, il faut que tu rentres vite à la maison." (Lilibeth, you need to come home quickly.)_

_"Pourquoi ?" (Why ?)_

_"C'est ton père." (It's your father.)_

_"J'en ai rien à foutre de lui." (I don't give a damn about him.)_

_"Non Lilibeth tu ne comprends pas. Il a eu un accident." (No Lilibeth you don't understand, there was an accident.)_

_Her heart dropped at the pit of her stomach._

_"J-J'arrive." (I-I'm coming.)_

"He was hit by a drunk driver while he was going to work."

"I'm sorry."

"I used to think he deserved it," she admitted, shocking him.

"I thought you said you were a Daddy's girl ?"

"I was. But then one day I caught him, tangled in the sheets with someone who was not my mom..."

"Oh."

"Yeah, that sucked. I really, really was mad at him when I saw him. I really told him nasty things but the thing is... he died shortly after."

"I'm so sorry Lilibeth," Lin whispered as he kissed the top of her head.

"You know what's the worst thing ?"

"What ?"

"It's that I understand what he told me, all these years ago."

_"Lilibeth, laisse-moi t'expliquer, s'il te plait," he pleaded. (Lilibeth, please, let me explain.)_

_"Vas-y."_ _(Go on, then.)_

_Her voice was ice cold._

_"Je... J'ai rencontré Laura dans un café. Et... je ne sais pas comment bien expliquer mais... Je ne pouvais pas me la sortir de la tête," he shrugged. "Je... je l'aime." (I.... I met Laura in a coffee shop. And... I don't really know how to explain it but... I couldn't get her out of my mind. I... I love her.)_

_She blinked several time, not sure if she had heard it right._

_"Quoi ?" (What ?)_

_"Je l'aime. J'ai beau avoir essayé de m'éloigner d'elle, de l'oublier... Je n'y suis pas arrivé. C'était elle. Depuis le début... c'était elle." (I love her. Even though I tried to stay away from her, to forget her.... I couldn't. It was her. From the beginning, it was her.)_

_"Et maman alors ? Tu t'en fou d'elle ?" (What about mum ? You don't care about her ?)_

_"Ne dis pas des bêtises, Lilibeth. J'aime toujours ta mère. Mais... c'est différent." (Don't be silly, Lilibeth. I still love your mother. But... it's different.)_

_"Alors pourquoi est-ce que tu ne l'as pas quitté dans ce cas-là !? Pourquoi est-ce que tu n'es pas parti ?" (Then why didn't you leave her ? Why didn't you leave ?)_

_"Je ne voulais pas la blesser." (I didn't want to hurt her.)_

_"Bien joué, Charles. Très bien joué," she sneered. "Parce que tu penses sincèrement que cette petite aventure ne va pas la blesser ?" (Well played, Charles, well played. Because you really think that this little affair of yours isn't going to hurt her ?)_

_"Je... Je suis désolée Lilibeth." (I'm... I'm sorry, Lilibeth.)_

_"Non. Je suis désolée. De ne pas avoir remarqué ça avant." (No. I am sorry. Sorry that I didn't notice it before.)_

"I understand because it reminds me of..."

_Us._

         The words were unspoken yet here nonetheless.

"And it's complicated and it's messy and I am still mad at him. But I am so sorry for all the mean things I told him," she cried. "You know what is the last thing he heard from me ?" he shook his head. "I hate you. I only want one thing, you dead."

"Oh Lilibeth... You were angry. You had no idea that it would be the last time you would talk to him."

"I know. I know. I know," she repeated over and over again. But Lin could clearly see that she was being eaten out by her demons. "But I never got the chance to tell him that I was sorry. That I regretted it. No, the last words he has from me are those... I... I'm horrible."

"Lilibeth, you were hurt. And you couldn't possibly know..."

"That doesn't mean that what I said was okay !"

"Shh, calm down," he soothed. "I've got you. I've got you Lilibeth."

"Yes you do," she sobbed. "God I know you do. But I don't," he froze. "I don't have you," he only hugged her even tighter than before and kissed her forehead. "I don't..."

"Everything is going to be okay, Lilibeth. Don't worry," he promised. "I've got you."

 

* * *

 

       When Lilibeth woke up with a headache she was overjoyed to find a glass of water on her nightstand with some aspirin. She looked around and saw her clothes scattered on the floor. So she did manage to undress while being drunk ?  
      That was new. Beneath the glass there was a small piece of paper with a handwriting she knew all too well. Some memories from the day before flashed in her mind, turning her cheeks the colour of her hair.

_I hope you're not too hangover. I got you this to make you feel better._

_I had to go back, lot of work to do, but feel free to call me if you need anything._

_I'm always there for you, Lilibeth. Always._

_Your Lin._

 

* * *

 

**_Come talk to me on my[tumblr](https://tinywhim.tumblr.com/)._ **

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Your comments and kudos give me life.


	12. THE DEPTH OF A DRAWER

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vanessa finds something she was not supposed to and Lin gets drunk.

       Vanessa loved Lin. He was her sweetheart. He always made sure that she had a cup of coffee ready when she left for work or a little something she could grab to eat when she came back late. He was perfect. Yet something had changed.  
      Maybe it was because he was working hard on _Hamilton_. Maybe it was because he was going to take it to Broadway next year. Maybe it was because he came home late and left early.

      But she also questioned herself in her relationship. They had been together for what... four, five years ? She still loved him. How could one not love Lin ? But... it wasn't the same. As time passed, she realized that her love wasn't as strong as it used to be.  
      She shook it off, reminding herself that it was normal. Love changes, right ? Then why didn't she feel the same anymore when Lin smiled at her ? Yet, one laugh from Mike would send her over the moon.

      She was quite confused when she cleaned their bedroom and found a little velvet box. She immediately froze. _No way..._ She slowly opened it and her breath got caught up in her throat at the sight of the beautiful engagement ring.  
      _Was Lin going to propose !?_ What was unsettling, more than the beautiful jewel inside it, was how dusty the box was. As if it had been there for quite some time. And not weeks. More like months.

      Her heart was beating fast in her chest, like a bird trying to leave its golden cage. She had to admit that Lin was someone who liked to commit, so it shouldn't surprise her. But still... she didn't know what to think about it.  
      She wasn't all excited and happy, wanting to cry in a corner. She felt stressed and anxious. Did she want to marry Lin ? She was lost. A few months ago, she would have said yes in a heartbeat. But something had changed.

      Lin had changed. She had changed. Of course, they still loved each other, there was no doubt in that. But they reached a point in their relationship where it was just comfortable and nothing more. They were both quite busy with their work.  
      Also, there was the issue of children, once again. Lin wanted children but Vanessa had barely the time because of her work. Of course her family was important too, but right now, she couldn't just get pregnant.

      This subject had already been a source of dispute in their relationship, yet Lin always accepted it. And if it hurt him, he did not show it. She felt bad; of course she did. But she simply thought that children could always happen later, right ? It's not like children were due to a specific time. When will Lin ask about it again ? And what would she tell him ?

      Overwhelmed, she put the box where she found it and just kept on going with her cleaning. What should she do ? Why didn't she feel butterflies in her stomach at the simple thought of marrying Lin ? She thought about the box. It was so dusty. For how long did it stay hidden in this drawer ? Did Lin still want to marry her ? If no, what had changed ?

> **From Mike : Hey, I've got something new for the case, want to grab a coffee and talk about it ?**

          Ah yes. She had changed. Lin too.

> **To Mike : Alright, usual place in 30 mins ?**
> 
> **From Mike : Make it 20.**

 

* * *

 

"Is everything alright, Nessa ?"

"Hum ?" she looked up to see her friend with a concerned frown. "Yeah, sure, why ?"

"I mean... you seem off. We've been talking about these evidences for almost half an hour and yet you still zone out."

"Sorry. I... I'm just feeling weird."

            He gently squeezed her hand.

"Did something happen with Lin ?"

"Not really," she shrugged. "I mean..."

"You can tell me you know, but only if you want to." 

"I was cleaning our room and I found it."

"What ?"

"The ring."

"The ring ?" he asked, confused. Then realization dawned upon his face. "Oh the ring !"

"Yeah..."

"And how do you feel about it ? I don't see you... excited ?"

"I should be, right ?"

"Not obviously. You can be with someone without wanting to marry them. We're in 2014."

"It's not that I don't want to marry him, it's just that... I don't know what I would say if he actually proposed."

"I don't understand, if you are not sure about accepting his proposal, then why are you even with him in the first place ?"

"Because I... I love him. But..." she bit her lips. "I don't know... everything has changed."

"Why ?"

              She looked at him for a little too long.

"I don't know," she smoothly lied.

"Is it because of...?"

         She shook her head. She paused, then she nodded.

"Oh V..." he sighed and squeezed her hand once again. "I'm sorry..."

"No, it's alright... I mean... I made my bed, I intend to lie in it."

"Can I lie in it with you ?" he offered, looking for a little twitch of her mouth. When she smiled, his heart raced. "Now, that's a pretty sight, Miss Nadal."

"Shut up."

"You wish."

      So Vanessa did the most logical thing a woman who had discovered her engagement ring when she was not supposed to, would do. She waited. She waited for a few days, then a few weeks... And when almost a month after, he still did not propose. She grew worried.  
      Did he forget about it ? No, of course not. No one forgets about proposing. She thought her heart was going to stop when they were walking together in a nearby park and that he got down to one knee. The poor man simply wanted to tie his shoelaces.

       Lin did notice that something was off with Vanessa. He thought it was her work. She was on a new case and as the trial was coming closer, Vanessa would always be stressed. Even though she was very good at her job.  
      He shrugged it off and put it on the account of work stress. But he did his best to make her feel better. He offered her a lot of massages (he was really good with those), small surprises at work. It'd be some chocolates or flowers.

       He was sweet. Always. She just knew that Lin had a lot of love to give. And not only to her. She could see how close he was to his friends. He was a sucker for hugs and things like that. So it wasn't surprising for her to find pics of him hugging people on twitter. Hell, how many times had he kissed John ?   
       Yet, she couldn't help but grow slightly weary when he saw recurring pictures of him and... Lilibeth was it ? The subway girl ?

       The redhead was absolutely beautiful, painfully so. She would put a lot of models to shame. And from what she heard from Lin and their friends, she was an absolute sweetheart. She saw a couple of videos of her singing, she was incredibly talented. They did spend a lot of time together. Vanessa was surprised she hadn't met the girl yet.

 _Maybe Lin doesn't want me to meet her._ She thought.

         But why ?

_You know why._

        No. Lin was loyal. She knew that. He was a good man, raised well by his family. He wouldn't be the kind of man to take comfort in another woman's arms when Vanessa was there. He was loving and caring and he loved her.  
       He loved her, right ? Then she thought of herself. She always belived that Lin would be the only man she'd have feelings for.

_"Now, that's a pretty sight, Miss Nadal."_

       Who was she kidding ? If Lin wasn't honest with her, she wasn't honest with him too. Nothing had really happened between her and Mike. But God, deep down, sometimes she wished something did.  
 _What happened to us ?_ She wondered as she looked at her lock screen. It was a picture of them. Something had changed. Something had changed ever since he met... Her eyes grew wide. _No._

      Maybe if she just ignored the problem it would go away. She didn't need to worry. She was the one Lin was going to propose, wasn't she ? Not Lilibeth. She was the one Lin came back home to at the end of the day, wasn't she ?  
      She was the one he bought flowers and chocolates to, wasn't she ? Lilibeth is just a good friend. Lin told her so. And she believed him. She trusted him. Because he was hers and hers only. Yes, she trusted him.  
      But could she really blame him to be attracted to someone else when she constantly pushed him away because of her work ?

"Are you alright, V ?" she gazed up to see Lin looking at her with a worried frown.

"Yes, perfect."

"You still up for that movie night, right ?" she raised her brows as realisation dawned upon her face. "You forgot, didn't you ?"

"Oh babe I am so sorry..." she apologized. "The trial is coming soon and there are some things I need to check to make sure everything is alright..."

"No, it's okay, I understand," he smiled but it didn't reach his eyes.

"Are you sure ?"

"Yes, don't worry about it."

"I can't put it off if you want..."

"You can't put the trial off," he scoffed. "No don't worry, we'll do that another time, after the trial. We'll have plenty of time."

"I guess you are right..." she reluctantly agreed.

"Of course I am. I always am."

"I thought I was the one who was always right ?"

"Yeah... sure," she hit him with a pillow, earning a chuckle. "Okay, okay I'm leaving," he quickly kissed her and took his phone. "Work well, alright ?"

"Yes daddy."

"Please don't ever call me like this again," she chuckled. "I'm heading out, probably going to grab a drink with the boys."

"Be careful !"

"Yes !"

       Lin decided he could go somewhere nice. He tried to call Chris, Daveed and Alex but they were all already taken and Lilibeth was too tired to go out. He was disappointed, because he didn't want to spend his night alone.  
      But he had no other choice. Grabbing something to drink didn't seem like a bad idea. He could use a little rest. And nothing could go wrong.

 

* * *

 

       A lot of things went wrong.

      He didn't remember much of his night. He did drink himself under the table. Because one beer turned into two and then into three and multiple shots. He hadn't planned to get wasted, truth to be said.  
      He just wanted to... release all the pressure that had been building up in him lately. He loved working on _Hamilton_ , he really did, but at the same time, it was exhausting. The rehearsals were coming closer with every passing day and he just hoped that everything would turn out fine.

      He remembered talking to the barman about something or rather, someone. He called someone, at some point. He just didn't remember who. (But he found it out later when he looked at his list of outgoing calls).  
      He had no recall of what was said during the conversation, he just hoped that it wasn't THAT important. He didn't want to get in any trouble since he had forgotten everything about it.

      He didn't remember how he managed to get back home. Maybe he walked, maybe he took a cab. There were some flashes of the night, though. The cold, two familiar faces he couldn't pin point crossing the road while holding hands, his hurt toe. (Yes, he did hurt his toe on a lamppost, that motherfucker.)

      Strangely, he remembered his dream, when he woke up shit-faced. He knew he had dreamt of Lilibeth, but nothing more. It wasn't really surprising to find her in his dreams, but yet he had this odd feeling about her. And his suspicions were confirmed when he received a text from her.

> **From Lilibeth : I hope your head is feeling better. But you should be careful about the things you say when you are drunk Lin. You could end up in a delicate situation.**
> 
> **To Lilibeth : What are you even talking about ?**
> 
> **From Lilibeth : You don't remember ?**
> 
> **To Lilibeth : Remember what ?**
> 
> **From Lilibeth : Nevermind.**

* * *

 

Come talk to me on my [tumblr](https://tinywhim.tumblr.com/).

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Your comments and kudos give me life.


	13. LOVE OF MY LIFE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daveed and Lilibeth go to the Chélie. She gets an unexpected phone call.

> **From The American Promise : Okay I'll see you in 10.**
> 
> **To The American Promise : See you in 10.**

       Lilibeth was never late. With her 'strict' upbringing, she was taught to always be on time. For her piano competitions, she always arrived an hour early. She was a punctual person.  
      She sighed as she rearranged her wild hair for the second time before deciding that it was time to go. The Chélie wasn't far away from her flat, so she knew that she would be right on time.

     As she was walking she couldn't help but feel guilty. Lin had asked her to go out and grab a drink. She told him that she was too tired. She shouldn't have lied... She should have told Lin the truth. But then once again, she didn't have to. She didn't need to tell him everything that was happening in her life.  
      She was a big girl, she could make her own decisions and she didn't need anyone's permission. She smiled when she saw the curly haired man in front of the pub.

"Well, well, well. If it isn't Miss Schuyler," greeted a deep voice with a southern accent.

            She arched an eyebrow as she smirked.

"Well, well, well. If it isn't Mister Jefferson."

"Oh, not Lafayette ? The accent betrayed, right ?"

"And your hair. Your hair is down, Daveed. You can't play Lafayette like this. Poor soul," the man chuckled and she hugged him. "Okay, you ready ?"

"Sure thing. I can't wait. I've never been there," he admitted as they made their way inside.

            The stage was all set up and Lilibeth waved at Tim.

"What are you even doing here ? You're not working tonight !" the tall man asked as he shook hands with Daveed.

"What ? You know it's Friday night. I have to sing, right ?" she chuckled. "And I wanted to show Daveed the place. He's never came here. So it's a first."

"You're going to have fun man."

"Ha ha, I hope so," Daveed smiled.

"Tim, could you make me a... first blood, please ? And Daveed, what do you want ?"

"I'll have just a beer."

"Well a First Blood and a beer please."

"On it."

           Daveed's eyes travelled across the room, his head moving to the beat of the song.

"It's pretty cool. Quite cosy."

"Yeah, I love it."

"You work here, right ?"

"Yup. I've been working here for almost two years."

"And you said it was every Friday night ?" he motioned to the set up stage in the middle of the pub.

"Yup. It's pretty cool. Are you going to sing ?"

"I don't know, are you ?"

"Are you answering my question with another question ?"

"I don't know, am I ?" she opened her mouth, smiling.

"You're unbelievable."

"There you go, lovebirds," Lilibeth scoffed as Tim gave them the two drinks. "It's on the house."

"I love you Tim."

"Love you too, Eliza."

            She took Daveed's hand and led him through the crowd. They managed to find some seats.

"I always love free booze."

"I bet your broke ass you do," she chuckled and he smirked.

"Who told you I was broke ?"

"I don't know, I have a feeling."

"Well, at least I know you are not after my money."

"Nah, I'm just after your hai,." she replied, eyeing it. "It so... fluffy. May I ?" She gestured toward it.

"Sure thing."

         She beamed and ruffled his hair. He couldn't help but smile as he was watching her. She looked like a kid who just got a cookie.

"How do you even do to have such a beautiful hair ? How does your life allow that ?"

"I have it made in the shade," he boasted.

"Don't Hamilton lyrics me."

"Oh I see someone did their homework."

"I heard that we're going to do a first read through, that's right ?"

"Yes. I've been playing Lafayette and Jefferson for almost two years. We already performed at the Vassar Workshop."

"How was it ?"

"Nice, funny but not completed. Some songs are missing. Lin is still working on it. We had the first act and two or three songs from the second act."

"I really like _What'd I miss ?"_ he grinned.

"You know, there's going to be a whole choreography with this song, it's going to be awesome."

"You know what I can't wait for ?"

"What ?"

"The costumes. 18 century costumes are a bliss, don't fight me."

"Ha ha ha, I get you. You're going to have a lot of pretty dresses."

"I hope so. When I did theatre as a kid, I really loved the costumes. I basically did the play just for that," Daveed laughed.

"So you're an accomplished pianist, singer and actress ?"

"Oh, I wouldn't say accomplished actress. I mean, I never starred into any movies..."

"Yet. Who knows, maybe someone is going to see you in _Hamilton_ and offer you a job."

"Yeah, I'm not sure."

"Why not ? Broadway acting is the hardest of all. If you manage to do it and I know you will, you'll be a certified actress."

"You do put a lot of faith in me, Daveed."

"Ah, that's because you do have a lot of potential Lilibeth," he smiled. "I'd hate it to see it go to waste."

"You're sweet."

"Thanks," he looked around. "What are you going to sing ? And please, tell me you're going to sing something else than this English dude's songs."

"You bet your ass I'm going to sing something from Ed Sheeran."

"C'mon, just because the guy is ginger like you ?" he chuckled and she put her hand on her chest.

"Do you have anything to say against red heads ? Because we are powerful. We are kissed by the sun."

"Not at all," the corners of his lips twitched up into a smile. "I like gingers."

"I bet you do, we're amazing. Oh, it's going to be my time. Are you going to sing too ?"

"Nah, tonight, I'll just watch."

"Perv," he chuckled as she went on stage and grabbed the guitar.

_**Tell me that you turned down the man** _   
_**Who asked for your hand** _   
_**'Cause you're waiting for me** _   
_**And I know, you're gonna be away a while** _

_**But I've got no plans at all to leave** _   
_**And would you take away my hopes and dreams?** _   
_**Just stay with me** _   
_**All my senses come to life** _   
_**While I'm stumbling home as drunk as I** _   
_**Have ever been and I'll never leave again** _   
_**'Cause you are the only one** _

_**And all my friends have gone to find** _   
_**Another place to let their hearts collide** _   
_**Just promise me, you'll never leave again** _   
_**'Cause you are the only one** _

_**Take my hand and my** _   
_**Heart and soul, I will** _   
_**Only have these eyes for you** _

_**And you know, everything changes but** _   
_**We'll be strangers if, we see this through** _   
_**You could stay within these walls and bleed** _   
_**But just stay with me** _

_**All my senses come to life** _   
_**While I'm stumbling home as drunk as** _   
_**Have ever been and I'll never leave agai** _   
_**'Cause you are the only on** _

_**And all my friends have gone to fin** _   
_**Another place to let their hearts collide** _   
_**Just promise me, you'll always be a friend** _   
_**'Cause you are the only one** _

_**I'm stumbling off drunk, getting myself lost** _   
_**I am so gone, so tell me the way home** _   
_**I listen to sad songs, singing about love** _   
_**And where it goes wrong?** _

_**All my senses come to life** _   
_**While I'm stumbling home as drunk as I** _   
_**Have ever been and I'll never leave again** _   
_**Cause you are the only one** _

_**And all my friends have gone to find** _   
_**Another place to let their hearts collide** _   
_**Just promise me, you'll always be a frien** _   
_**'Cause you are the only one** _

       As usual, the crowd cheered and Daveed couldn't help to be astonished. Even though he had heard her sing before, it was still a spectacle to behold. Lin told him about Lilibeth before, he told her about her voice and her whole personality and everything about her.  
       He had told him that once she was on stage, she was something else. Something beautiful, something ethereal.

        He couldn't help the warm feeling to spread in his chest as well as his fast beating heart when he was watching her. He felt... bewitched by her. Sure, this little 'sortie' was not a date. It was just a night out between two friends who wanted to have some fun, drink a couple of beers and that's all. But oh boy... she did make it hard, without even trying.

"That was amazing. Damn I got chills, I literally got chills when you sang Lilibeth."

"Now you're being too kind."

"Bullshit, you know I'm not ! You're really talented."

           She opened her mouth to reply but her phone rang.

"Oh sorry."

"Go on," she smiled, thankful.

"Hello ?"

" _Lilibeth ?_ " the man hiccupped through the phone. " _You there ?_ "

"Yes, Lin. I picked up, didn't I ? What's happening ? _"_

" _Oh, there was something important I needed to tell ya !_ "

           She chuckled. He sounded funny.

"What is it ?"

" _Well first of all, you're beautiful. Like... Drop dead gorgeous. And then..._ " he paused for a couple of seconds and for a moment she thought he had fallen asleep. " _I love ya._ "

         She frowned.

"Are you drunk, Lin ?" Daveed arched an eyebrow as she sheepishly smiled.

" _No,_ " he paused. " _Yes I am._ "

             The curly haired mouthed 'drunk ?' and Lilibeth nodded.

"Are you alone ?"

" _Yes._ "

"Lin... that's not really sensible," she scolded. "Did you drink a lot ?"

" _Maybe.._."

"Lin _._ "

" _Yes I did._ "

"You don't have your car, right ?"

" _No, I walked._ "

"Good, good."

" _But hey, do you love me ?_ "

"Yes, Lin," she sighed once again. "And you know it."

" _Yeah but I don't love you like this,_ " she froze. " _I love you more than I am supposed to. Is it bad ?_ "

             Her lips quivered as a thousand words wanted to leave her mouth.

" _If loving you is wrong, then I don't want to be right, Lilibeth._ "

"Lin... I think you should head home and go to sleep. You're totally wasted."

" _Yeah you're right, I'm totally wasted,_ " he laughed. " _Fuck I'm pretty sure the alarm is going to kill me tomorrow._ "

"You better go."

" _But ya love me ? Right Lilibeth ?_ " he sounded so hopeful, almost as if he were completely lucid.

"Yes of course I do. You know it, Lin _._ "

" _Good_."

"Take care _._ "

" _Love ya,_ " she hung up.

"Is everything alright ?" Daveed asked, slightly worried.

"Yeah, yeah. Just Lin being drunk."

"Yeah, he did tell me that he wanted to hang out tonight."

"You said no," he sheepishly grinned.

"I had something more interesting planned," he wiggled his eyebrows, making her laugh.

"He asked me too..." she sadly smiled. "And I told him I was tired. We are bad friends."

"I wouldn't say that. I mean... I didn't tell a lie. But you ? Yeah, you definitely are." 

            She threw him a peanut from the little bowl they had in front of them.

"Fuck you," he laughed.

"Don't worry, it's Lin," he gently squeezed her hand. "He doesn't need to know," he shrugged. "I mean... you don't owe him anything, right ?"

"No. Not at all."

_But why did it feel so weird to lie to him then ?_

"We could go back to my flat if you want," she offered. "And no, no sex. It's not a date, remember ?" he chuckled as he nodded. "But I'm pretty sure I can kick your ass at Mario Kart."

"Oh, I'd like to see you try."

 

* * *

 

      She won. Several times. No one could beat her at that game, it was a fact. They both spent a good time and Lilibeth was happy. She shrugged off the giddy feeling that had spread in her body when Daveed had grabbed her hand once they had left the bar to go to her flat.  
       He had been rambling nonsense and they were both laughing, ignoring the cold enveloping them. She did spend a good time with him. It was refreshing to have someone to talk to and someone who wasn't Lin.

      She loved Lin, she really did. And it seemed that from his call, he loved her too. But she liked being able to talk about things with someone else. Daveed was quickly becoming her best friend and she was happy with that.  
           She didn't find sleep as quickly as she was used to and she perfectly knew why. _I love you more than I'm supposed to._ She closed her eyes. _Is it bad ?_

       Oh yes Lin, it was bad. It was bad because of Vanessa. It was bad because it was unfair. It was bad because she was sure he knew about her affections and she felt like she was being toyed with. Yet, knowing him, she knew that he meant no harm. He was just drunk and he just wanted to get it out of his chest. Or perhaps his mind was clouded and what he told her wasn't true.

       Lilibeth was completely lost. It was funny how lost she could be because of one single Puerto Rican. Everything was easier in her life, before he came in. But he also made everything better, apart from these moments of self-doubt and confusion. Because of course, she sent him a text the day after. The poor man had no idea what she was talking about.

        It wasn't surprising. She knew that he had drunk a lot of alcohol that night and that he didn't really know what he was saying. But it still hurt, you know ? She had hoped, a little part of her had hoped that it was real.  
         That he could be hers, even for just a moment. _But this is not a fairy tale, Lilibeth. Life's a bitch._ So she lied. She lied to him. She told him that it was no big deal, that nothing happened. He believed her. Of course he believed her, he trusted her.

 

* * *

 

        It was pure hazard, really. Lilibeth was craving something sweet and she had decided to bake an apple crumble, but she needed apples, so she decided to go to the grocery store.  
         She remembered how she had promised Lin that she would make him a crumble, one day. Perhaps she could save him a piece of it and give it to him as soon as she'd see him again.

        It was pure hazard, really. She really thought that Fate was a bitch, though. The grocery was not far away from her flat and not busy at all. She was quite glad, she hated queuing.  
         But what a surprise it was when she spotted Lin not far away from her. She couldn't help but feel giddy as she approached him but she quickly froze.

"Babe, look !"

             A beautiful woman appeared at his side with a silly hat on.

"Aren't you just beautiful like that ?" beautiful Lin chuckled as he looked at her.

"You're a darling," she kissed his cheeks and picked up a watermelon.

"Now, put it back, we don't want to see you get hurt."

"But I wanted to make a fruit salad. I need one," she replied. "And for your information, I'm tough."

"Yeah, you're a tough cookie."

_You're a special cookie._

"Aren't you sweet ?"

"Sweeter than honey, love," he beamed.

           She had always selfishly thought that she was the only one he looked at like this.

"Come on, let me carry this bag."

"Oh... aren't you the perfect boyfriend ?"

             Her heart tightened in her chest as she heard him let out his laugh that she loved so much.

"What can I say ?" the beautiful woman smiled as she was looking at him. "I'm irresistible."

"And quite modest too."

"You love me."

"I sure do, Lin."

             She tried to turn around, to leave. She didn't to get even more hurt. But the next she knew was that someone was calling her name. The couple was now looking at her. Lin was waving at her.

"Hey," she faked her best smile.

"Funny see you here, Lilibeth."

"Come on, Lin, you don't own all groceries shops, do you now ?" she teased, trying to calm her heartbeat.

"You bet your ass I do," he stuck his tongue and she almost laughed. "Oh, sorry, right. Vanessa this is Lilibeth," he introduced.

"Oh yes, the subway girl !" she grinned. "I've seen videos of you singing. You are amazing on stage !" she beamed and Lilibeth felt her heart melt. She was so sweet. "You have the prettiest voice I have ever heard !" her cheeks turned the colour of her hair.

"Nice to meet you Vanessa."

            The woman hugged her and it felt so wrong. Lin's lips were pressed into a thin line as he was observing them.

"And thank you, for all the compliments."

"What brings you here ?" Lin asked, curious.

"I'm going to bake an apple crumble."

"Lucky you. Keep a piece for me, will you ?"

"You wish."

_Of course I will._

"Lin told me that you are the new Eliza, right ?" Vanessa smiled.

"Yes. I am. I really got lucky," she chuckled.

"Have you ever been on Broadway before ?" she shook her head.

"No, it's my first time."

"You must be quite nervous !"

"You have no idea," Vanessa chuckled.

"But that's alright, you have Lin to take care of you, right love ?" she looked at her boyfriend who smiled.

"Sure thing," He replied, his eyes never leaving the red head, looking at her for a little too long.

_Stop._

"And you have Christopher and Daveed too. They're really sweet."

"I'm lucky, the crew are adorable with me. They are very welcoming."

"Do you play any instrument ?"

"Actually yes, piano and guitar. I know my way around with the flute too."

"Wow, that's impressive."

"Lilibeth is the daughter of one of the most famous pianist in the world," Lin explained. "She was called the Little prodigy during her competition."

"Really ?" Vanessa asked in awe, making Lilibeth blush.

"Y-yeah, but I mean, I don't really like the nickname," Vanessa looked at her watch.

"Honey, we really have to go."

"Yeah you're right. I'll see you around, Lilibeth ?" she pressed her lips into a thin line and nodded.

"Sure thing."

        She had never felt more alone than when she saw them walk together out of the store. She then remembered that it had been a long time since she was with someone and that she missed it.  
        She missed calling someone hers, having someone to hold her close when she felt like she could collapse. She thought she had found it. She thought she had.

       She didn't feel like baking anymore. She left the grocery shop with nothing and headed back home. What really hurt wasn't the fact that Vanessa was there, because she just knew that he was with Vanessa.  
       What hurt was that the girl was absolutely adorable and that she loved Lin. And Lin, from what she saw, loved her. Then in that case, what was she doing here ? Who was she, to stand in the middle of two people who love each other ?

        And yet, Lilibeth was lost. She was lost because she saw the way Lin was with Vanessa and sometimes, he was like that with her too. She didn't know if she should feel furious or delighted about it. She felt so confused about the whole situation that she decided to call the best person to help her out.

"Alex, I need your wisdom, could you help me ?"

"I'm coming."

        When the pianist arrived to her place, she looked miserable. She had puffy eyes, her makeup was a disaster and her hair was a mess. Yet, before she told him what was the problem, he already had an idea.  
        Alex was no fool and he wasn't surprised if it involved Lin. He loved his friend, he really did, but sometimes, he was just plainly stupid. He gently rubbed her back as she calmed herself. Why did it have to be so difficult ?

"I feel so bad for having these feelings when I just met his girlfriend. Vanessa is such a sweetheart..."

"You can't blame yourself for these feelings, Lilibeth. You should know that."

"I... I know... But I am so confused..." she frowned. "He's always sweet with me, he sweeps me off my feet, makes me feel as if I mattered and then he goes back to his girlfriend at the end of the day. It hurts so much Alex, I don't know what to do," she admitted, biting her lower lip.

"Have you tried to talk to him ?" he asked and she shook her head.

"I can't talk to him about it. He has a girlfriend."

"Just because he is with someone doesn't mean that he can't feel something for you."

"But it's wrong."

"I don't know. But what is wrong is to worry about this and get hurt."

"It's beyond me, Alex. Every time I see him, every time he smiles I just..." she sighed. "Maybe I should stop seeing him."

"And be hurt ? And hurt him too ? I'm not sure it's the best idea. And I mean... with you playing his wife on stage, it might be impossible."

"I shouldn't have said yes."

"Yes you should have because you deserve it, Lilibeth," Alex frowned.

"I'm sorry... I'm being selfish."

"You said it yourself, you're confused."

"Is it bad that I want them to break up ? Because I want him ? I feel like a terrible person."

"You love him, it's comprehensible."

"I hate myself."

"You really shouldn't."

"Every time I'm around him, I feel my resolve crumble. I have this impression that I am going to do something I'll regret later."

            He looked at her for a couple of seconds, pondering.

"Talk to him about it. If he feels the same way towards you, then perhaps he should leave Vanessa."

"That's not fair to her."

"This situation isn't fair to the three of you. And I think it would be better for Vanessa not to be with someone who has already found his home in someone else's heart."

            Alex loved Vanessa, she was sweet and a dear friend. But he couldn't deny the happiness Lin could reach if he were with Lilibeth.

"He called me, you know ?" she sniffled. "He was drunk. Completely drunk. And... he just told me he loved me. That he loved me more than he was supposed to. And he doesn't even remember."

"Oh the idiot."

"I know, right ?" she slightly chuckled. "I mean... you say that to a girl who already loves you but can't have you... that's not really fair."

"You told me that you went out with Daveed, right ?"

"Yes, I did."

"How do you feel about him ?"

"I like him. He's a really good friend and a good listener. But it's not the same, he's not..."

_Lin._

"I see..."

"He makes me feel good, though. But we're not dating, we're just friends."

_For now._

"You know what, I'm going to make you a cup of hot chocolate. You'll be better with it."

 

      He got up and went to her kitchen. Having been invited over a several times to write songs, Alex knew his way around the flat. The man couldn't help but feel terrible for his friends. He knew that was they had was wondrous. But Lin had to be careful. He couldn't just treat Lilibeth like that, keeping her at arm's length so he could have her whenever he wanted. She didn't deserve that.

        He knew that his relationship with Vanessa and his relationship with Lilibeth were beyond compare. He loved Vanessa yet he knew that Lilibeth was the perfect match for him. If only they had met earlier... Life would have been kinder to them. They could have been together, they could have been happy instead of suffering far away from each other because of their affections.

        He didn't even know how it was going to turn out with _Hamilton_. She had to play his wife, for God's sake ! But then, if she was the actress he thought her to be, she could be professional about it and she'd be able to take things into consideration. It would be hard, but she could do it. He then thought about Daveed. What did he have in mind ?

       Alex was not blind. Back at the karaoke night, he had seen how interested he was in the red head. He knew that he liked her. Even Lin had noticed it. (He didn't like it at all, by the way.)  
        Lilibeth was so confused at the moment, he was sure that she didn't need another love story to deal with. Once he was done with the hot chocolate, he went back into the living room and observed her silently as she started playing on her keyboard.

" _ **Love of my life, you've hurt me,**_ " she spoke softly. " _ **You've broken my heart and now you leave me,**_ " she closed her eyes, chasing the image of Lin and Vanessa in her mind. " _ **Love of my life, can't you see? Bring it back, bring it back, don't take it away from me, because you don't know..."**_ she sighed. " _ **What it means to me. Love of my life, don't leave me, you've stolen my love, you now desert me...**_ " tears rolled down her rosy cheeks and fell on the keyboard. " _ **Love of my life, can't you see? Bring it back, bring it back... Don't take it away from me, because you don't know what it means to me...**_ "

"It's a beautiful song, you know."

"I know," she took the hot beverage from Alex's hands. "Thank you."

"What are you going to do ?"

"I'll see what Lin does," she replied after a while. "I'm going to see where he wants to take this relationship. And if he can't choose, I'll make the choice myself."

"And that would be ?"

"Leave him and his Vanessa alone."

"What about you ?"

"I'm a big girl. I'll manage."

           If only Alex could believe her.

 

* * *

 

Come talk to me on my [tumblr](https://tinywhim.tumblr.com/).

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Your comments and kudos give me life.


	14. THAT WOULD BE ENOUGH

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lin has a writer's block. Lilibeth helps him.

      A couple of weeks had passed and Lin was not okay. He was fine, sure, but not happy. Something had changed within him, he didn't know what yet, but he just knew that something had changed.  
      He texted with Lilibeth quite a lot, and ever since that episode with her father and her past, they grew even closer than they used to be. But Lin knew where his boundaries stood.  
      They would remain friends. Good friends, and that was all. He simply ignored how his heart ached late at night, when he laid beside his Vanessa, longing for Lilibeth. It wasn't fair but it's not like he could prevent his subconcious from thinking about the red head. So he would dream about her, but make no actual move. He couldn't.

      Also, he was struggling to write his musical, which did not improve his mood. Some of his songs needed a bit of re-writing and there were still missing songs as well. He needed them quickly, especially with the rehearsals just around the corner.  
      And there he was, struck by a writer's block. He HATED those. He'd tried to go out, to walk outside, to change his mind. He even went into his favourite café, _Broken Dreams_ , but nothing had changed. It was as if he had been stripped of his inspiration and talent.

"How's Lilibeth ?"

             He gazed up and smiled when he saw Philipp. The café was calm and Lin liked it better that way.

"She's alright. Thanks. She works really hard to save as much money as she can. She wants to move out," he informed. "She grew tired of her small flat. She said, and I quote : _'I want a prettier view than my neighbour's bathroom where I can see him shave every morning.'_ "

"I know how those are expensive in the city," the old man chuckled.

"You tell me," he sighed. "The city is great but so overpriced. And I'm not only talking about flats, but everything. Coffee shops ? Damn you Starbucks."

"Look at me, I'm one of the rare cafés with reasonable prices."

"I know this and I love you," Lin replied with a bright smile, making his friend laugh.

"It's been quite a long time since I last saw you with Lilibeth here, what's going on ?"

"Oh, nothing," he shrugged, ignoring how his heart yearned for her. "She's busy with her work and she's working hard for the musical. And here I am, struck by a writer's block."

"Perhaps it would do you good to actually see her."

"How so ?" he frowned, confused.

"Well, you see, if you stay in the same state of mind and same environment, your writer's block won't go away. But if you interact with other people and don't think about your project, it might get better."

"You think so ?"

"Absolutely," Phillip assured him. "It works, trust me."

"I do. I'll call her, thank you."

"You're welcome, kiddo."

             He dialled her number as the owner walked away from him.

"Hey, Lilibeth, am I disturbing ?"

" _Totally. I am boring myself to death with a shitty movie. What's up ?"_

"Do you want to meet at the café ?"

" _When ?_ "

"How about now ?"

" _Alright. See you_."

"See you."

       He was in the middle of his third coffee when the bell rang and Lilibeth entered. She brightened the whole room. Today, her hair was tied into a messy bun and she had some locks perfectly framing her flushed face.  
      She was wearing glasses, which confused him because he didn't remember that she needed those. Or if she did, she never told him about it. He waved at her so she could see him and she smiled when her eyes fell on him. He literally melted.

"Hey !" she grinned.

"Hey."

_I missed you._

"How are you ?"

"Tired because of work, but fine and you ?"

"Tired. And annoyed. I have a writer's block."

"Oh shit."

"Yep."

"That's tough."

"Yes I know."

"That sucks."

"Would you please stop saying these kind of things? It's not helpful !" she chuckled and he couldn't help but follow her.

"What are you doing here ?"

"What do you mean ? That's my café."

"No it's not. It's Philipp's," she smiled. "I mean, you know this place. It's your usual place."

"It's my usual place," he confirmed.

"But that's the thing," he frowned, confused. "You need something new. You need to go out."

"I did get out. It didn't work."

"Well, that's because you didn't try with me," she grinned. "You need a change of scenery. Let's go somewhere."

"Where ?"

"Anywhere."

               His smile grew.

"Anywhere ?"

"We could go to Cold Spring," she offered. "It's not really THAT far away from here and it's a beautiful place."

"Isn't it a one hour ride ?"

"I think."

"Are we going to do this ?"

               His heart leaped in his chest.

"I think we are."

"Let's go," he beamed and took her hand before leaving.

      He held her tightly, refusing to let her go. He was surprised at how bold and yet comforting holding her hand felt. As if it was meant to be. On the train, they spoke about everything they loved. She told him about her favourite animated movie being Anastasia, about her favourite ice cream flavour and how she fell in love with Remus Lupin.  _He basically was my first summer crush, Lin._    
      The ride lasted for an hour, so they did have the time to talk. Lin was flabbergasted at how at ease he was with her. He'd always been uncomfortable and nervous around beautiful women. He had no chills whatsoever, but with her, it felt natural.

      He told her that she was the first person that he met with different coloured eyes. She beamed and told him that in her native language, we talked about ' _yeux vairons_.', which did sound weird yet lovely to his ears.  
      So he decided to called her _Vairon_ , without the 's', because it sounded better. She told him that he was silly, but deep down she was delighted and found it incredibly cute and sweet.

      Lilibeth tried to resonate herself by thinking of Vanessa, telling herself that it was wrong to feel so comfortale about someone who was already taken. It's not like she she had a shot. But she was no fool. The way he would act, the way he would look at her for a little too long, the way he would always find an excuse to touch her.  
      She wasn't naive. But no harm had been done, yet. So she decided to ignore it and just to live with it. She didn't care if she couldn't have him. _Liar._ She just wanted to enjoy the time she had with him.

      It wasn't fair. But life hardly was. She was no child, she was a grown woman and she could make her own decisions. Good or bad, they were hers to make. Of course she knew she was falling for him, falling hard.  
      Of course she knew that she was stupid to be attracted to a man who was already committed to someone. But she hadn't known that before. When she'd first met him, he was just Lin. Not Vanessa's boyfriend. He had been hers to be, if he'd wanted. _And God, how hard he had wanted._

"You're still sure that it was no big deal when I drunk called you ?" Lilibeth almost froze. "Because I mean, you told me about delicate situation..."

"Y-yeah that's because you started talking about..."

"About...?"

           She averted his eyes.

"About your body," she smoothly lied.

"My body ?" he frowned, confused.

"Yes ! Your body. More like your... hum... private parts...?"

              She didn't know it was possible for him to turn such a shade of red.

"Oh my God, Lilibeth, I am so sorry," she chuckled.

"No, it's alright don't worry."

"Oh but no it's not ! I don't remember what I told you."

 _If loving you is wrong, then I don't want to be right, Lilibeth._

"But please believe me when I say that I am deeply sorry."

"Hey it's alright, at least you didn't send me a dick pic."

                His eyes grew even wider. She thought they were going to pop out of his skull.

"D-Don't say things like that Lilibeth."

                She decided that flustered Lin was her favourite Lin.

"Hey, you know what I really love in musicals ?" she asked, changing the topic, which he was grateful for.

"What is it ?"

"You tell stories with songs and sometimes, just one song changes everything," she slowly smiled. "Look at _Helpless,_ " he tilted his head, listening her quietly. "In one song, I see you for the first time, fall in love then we get married," she chuckled.

           He looked at her silently for a couple of seconds. _It took me a song to fall in love with you._ He wanted to say.

"If only life could be so easy," he replied and she nodded.

"You know I really like when you say ' _as long as I'm alive Eliza, swear to God you'll never feel so-.'_ With your deep voice," she sheepishly admitted.

"I know," He smiled knowingly, surprising her. "It makes you laugh. That's why I do it."

                She smiled adorably at him and he almost jumped out of his seat to kiss her.

"That's really sweet of you."

"Hey, we're on stage, working really hard. So if we might as well have a little bit of fun."

"You're totally right," she couldn't agree more. Acting could be stressing sometimes. "And it's really, really sweet when you say ' _My life is gon' be fine cuz Eliza's in it_.'. Like... damn. Do people really think that nowadays?" she chuckled more to herself. Lin bit his lower lip.

"Yes, they do."

               He stared at her and she quickly averted her eyes because she knew that look on his face. They stayed silent for a couple of minutes and Lin wanted to smack his head on the table. _One way to make the whole thing totally awkward. Nice going, Lin._

"Hey, do you have a favourite song ?"

"Actually, I do have several. But at the moment ?" she put her finger on her chin as she was thinking. "I'd probably say... _Satisfied,_ " he pressed his lips into a thin line. "Renée's voice is everything. And this song is so heart-breaking... And... I don't know."

_It reminds me of us, Lin._

"An impossible love," she bitterly laughed and she shook her head. She missed the flash of recognition that crossed Lin's face. "It's just so beautifully written."

"You did hear the demo I sang ?" she laughed.

"Yeah. God it sounded as if it had been recorded in hell. I'm sorry," he joined her. "No offense."

"None taken."

"I... I had a question."

"Shoot."

"It's about _Say no to this,_ " he narrowed his eyes.. "Jazz's voice is absolutely wonderful in it. And that made me wonder... Even though it's Alexander's point of you, it sounds so... personal. You see what I mean ?"

                   He nodded wordlessly.

"Like... did you get inspired by something to write it ?"

                   _You._

"Not really. Nothing in particular why are you asking ?" he asked, his voice slightly high pitched.

"Because I mean... it's a pretty intense song."

"It's a pretty intense situation," he retorted, crossing his arms.

"I think it sounds almost impossible that Hamilton cheated on Eliza, because he loved her so much..." she wistfully sighed.

"You know, sometimes love isn't enough," he spoke because he could stop himself.

"Then what's the point of being in a relationship then ? If you look for someone else's affection, then you really need to look at your life choices," she frowned and he knew that she was talking about her dad.

"You know... I didn't think that you would actually like it," he admitted. "I mean, with everything that happened with your dad..."

"I didn't at first. But then I heard Jazz sing it and man..." he grinned. "She's really good."

"She is."

       Before they knew it, they arrived in Cold Spring. The sun was at its peak and graced the city with its warm rays. Cold Spring was a beautiful place. They gently strolled together, taking in their surroundings, stopping once or twice in front of some shops.  
      At some point, as they were talking, Lin took her hand. But it was different than earlier. It felt more intimate. She didn't really know how to react.

      A logical reaction would have been to let go of his hand and tell him that it wasn't a good idea. But since when was Lilibeth Williams logical ? Everything about her and Lin was chaotic. It was a mess and she dived in it head first. When she didn't say anything, Lin slightly smiled, delighted by the turn of events.

        This little sortie, in fact, did help him. As he spoke with Lilibeth about his musical, explaining her what he had in mind for some songs and for some scenes, the writer's block slowly disappeared and he had to sit on a bench to actually write all the ideas that were flowing through his mind, as if the dam blocking his inspiration had been lifted and that all of his ideas crashed on him like a tidal wave.

       The red head observed him silently as he scribbled into his notebook. She had never seen him like this before. His eyes were wild and she smiled when she saw how messy his writing was.  
      She had read somewhere that the messier the handwriting, the more intelligent the person was. She wouldn't be surprised if this applied to Lin. He was a clever cookie. And it was nice, to see him write after a week of writer's block. She had been through it when she had to write her theses. She silently snapped a few pictures of him.

"Lin, it's getting late, we should head back," she told him when she noticed how dark it was. She wondered if he noticed at all.

"Hum ?"

"We should go home," she repeated.

"Yeah, you're right," he nodded as he got up.

                 She looked at her watch and sighed.

"We could sleep here, in a hotel. It's pretty late."

"Sounds good. I'm way too tired to make the way back," he agreed. "But first, we should grab something to eat."

"I feel like a greasy pizza."

"Don't even get me started. I could kill for a greasy pizza."

             She laughed and grabbed his arm as they were slowly making their way downtown. There weren't a lot of restaurants, but they did manage to find a place that looked attractive to them. Which had pizzas, of course.

"Okay, so..."

             Now that they were both seated and warmed up, she had decided to ask silly questions.

"Tell me, what's the most ridiculous thing you've ever done ?"

"Wow, getting THAT personal, Williams ?" he arched an eyebrow, making her chuckle. "How do I know you're not going to use it against me later ?"

"You don't," she shrugged. "But I am a woman of honour," she promised with a hand on her heart.

"You sure seem like it," he arched an eyebrow.

"Piss off," he laughed. "Come on, the most ridiculous thing ?"

"The most ridiculous thing eh ?" he hummed as he searched into his memories. "Okay, I have one. When I was in high school, I actually wrote a whole movie so I could have a kissing scene with a girl I had a crush on."

              She pressed her lips into a thin line, quiet.

"That's okay, you can laugh."

              Her lips broke into a grin.

"No, I mean... that's not really ridiculous, that's pretty cute."

"Rather creepy, don't you think ?"

"You were a kid, longing to be kissed. Of course you'd be desperate."

_Yet here I am. A grown man, longing to be kissed, by you._

"I was desperate, indeed," he agreed, chucking.

"And did you get to kiss her ?"

"Yes."

"Well at least it worked."

"Not really, she wasn't really into me," he shrugged.

"Oh..."

"Yeah, but that's fine, it was a very long time ago, things changed, now I'm a grown up and..."

"And in a relationship," she finished.

                There was a pregnant pause.

"For how long have you been together ?"

"Almost five years."

"Wow, that's a lot."

"Yeah, I guess so."

_It's a lot and I was going to propose. But then you came._

       They asked the waitress if there was any affordable hotel nearby and they were beyond happy to know that one was located ten minutes away. Lilibeth now knew that every time Lin would ask her out, she'd always put some sneakers on. Because only God knew where they would both end up by the end of the day. Miles away from home, probably. It wouldn't surprise her.

"Hello !" they were greeted by the receptionist as they entered the building. "May I help you ?"

"Yes, we'd like a room please."

"One room ?" he asked.

"Yeah, we'll get one room," Lilibeth replied. Lin's eyes widened and he looked at her. "What ? It's less expensive."

"Y-yeah, you're right."

"Of course I am," she scoffed, making him smile. "Just with two separate beds please."

"Right away ma'am."

                They took their keys and went into their rooms.

"I'm going to take a shower."

"Alright, I'll go after you," he replied and settled on his bed, taking his notebook to write. After some time, his phone started ringing. It was Vanessa. "Hello ?"

" _Hello babe, it's me. I just got your text and wanted to call you. Is everything okay ? It doesn't look like you to leave the city like this_."

"It's alright, everything's fine," he replied as he watched Lilibeth go out of the bathroom, her hair still wet.

             She was thankful that the hotel had spare pyjamas. It made him smile.

"I just... needed some fresh air, like you said. But I didn't see the time pass and I thought it'd be best if I stayed overnight."

" _You're right. Where are you, though ?_ "

"In Cold Spring, actually."

" _Cold spring ? I thought you were still in New York !_ " she laughed.

"No, I'm in cold spring, with a friend of mine."

" _Alex ?_ "

"No, Lilibeth."

" _And she helped you with your writer's block ?_ "

"Yeah, actually she did," he admitted, not knowing if it was going to anger her.

" _Oh, Lin that's great ! So you can write again ?_ " she asked, Lilibeth long forgotten.

"Yeah, well, I'm working on a song right now and I think it's pretty good."

" _Oh, baby I am so happy for you ! I'm glad your writer's block is over._ "

"Yeah, me too."

" _I guess it was a good thing for you to go out, it really helped !_ "

              Lilibeth waved at him as she propped herself onto the bed, informing him that he could take a shower. He nodded and grinned at her.

"I have to go, V, but I'll text you tomorrow when I head back home."

" _Alright, I'll see you tomorrow. Love you._ "

"You too."

             He hung up.

"Vanessa ?"

"Yup."

"She's not scared that you spend time in a hotel room with an another woman ?" she wondered, no malice in her voice.

"No, she trusts me."

"Is she right ?"

            He stared at her for a couple a seconds. He knew she meant no harm with her question but yet it made him think. He cleared his throat.

"I'm going to take a shower."

       When he entered the bathroom, Lin let out a breath he had no idea he was holding. What was this question ? Of course she was right to trust him ! He would never... He closed his eyes and thought about Lilibeth's wet hair and her glowing skin from the shower she'd just taken. He already knew where he would delicately press his lips onto her fair skin and he would...

       He shook his head. No. He shouldn't think of that. He decided to take cold shower, because only that could help him the best in the state he was. He somehow heard Lilibeth shout something about getting food in the hotel or something like that, telling him that she would be back soon.  
      That was good, he could actually think. Or rather, not thing about her and her beautiful and soft body.

      Once he was done he looked at his reflection on the mirror. The bag under his eyes were still present and he wondered if one day they were going to leave. Perhaps he'll always have them. _What did you get yourself into, Miranda ?_  
        His eyes questioned but no response came. It was all on him. He was the one who grew overly attached to Lilibeth in such a short time.

      He knew it wasn't fair. Just because things had been slightly rough lately with Vanessa because of work didn't mean that he could... And yet, he couldn't prevent himself from seeing her. He was compelled to see her.  
       He sighed, ruffling his hair as he excited the bathroom, his shirt in his hand. He wondered if he could get a new t-shirt, because he didn't feel like sleeping in the one he'd been wearing all day.  
       Since his legs were still slightly wet, he struggled to put his pants on. He almost tripped over and fell on the floor.

"You look like you could actually use some help," a familiar voice teased him.

            Lilibeth was back, carrying a bag full of snacks and a coke. She couldn't stop her eyes from wondering to his rather plump butt, _damn I didn't know his ass looked so fine,_ which he quickly covered by pulling his trousers up and buttoning them. _Pity._

"Oh, sorry. I thought you were still looking for food," he apologized.

                She raised the bag.

"I'm done. I spent twenty bucks on useless shits that will probably give us diabetes," she shrugged and that made him grin. "I thought it might be fun to die because of sugar," she smirked and looked at him.

      She tried very hard to look into his eyes but boy, he did not make it easy. Lin was somehow fit and yet, slightly chubby on some parts. Lilibeth loved it. She knew that he had caught her staring but she couldn't really stop.  
       Oh how much she wanted to jump on him and to ravish his beautiful body. She blamed it on her lack of sexual life.

      First, they were alone in a hotel room, both definitely craving for sexual intercourse and Lin's torso was still dampened because of the shower he just had. The things she would do to him if he wasn't in a relationship...  
      As for Lin, it took every will that was left in him not to take her right now, because he knew very well that look in her eyes. He was pretty sure he had the same one. _Hunger_.

       It'd been quite a long time since he had last slept with Vanessa, simply because he couldn't get the redhead out of his head. They shouldn't be allowed to stay alone in a room, it wasn't safe. He quickly put his shit back on too.

"Hey, your hair is quite long," she remarked, leaving the bag on her bed and tossing him a coke, which he easily caught.

              He nodded as a thanks.

"I could braid it for you," she offered. "But you might have a wavy hair tomorrow," he chuckled.

"Sure, go ahead. I don't mind."

"Go sit," she instructed and she sat behind him. "It's easier when the hair is wet," she explained as she kept on going. "I'm going to do a French braid; like that it'll take all of your hair."

             He closed his eyes and relaxed as he felt her hands run through his scalp.

"You know, actually, I like this feeling," he said, closing his eyes as she was working with his hair. "It's like when you go to the hair dresser and they start a sort of massage like... oh yes oh my god just like that please don't stop," he moaned as she started rubbing his head.

             She supressed a laugh and kept on going. She could tell that from his tense shoulder that he was not at all relaxed.

"Hey, chill Lin. You're so tense it hurts my fingers," he cleared his throat.

"I'm sorry, it's just that, I have no chill whatsoever."

"You ?"

"Yeah, I know it's surprising right ? People think that I'm all self-confident and everything but nope."

"That's a surprise," she chuckled.

"Are you trying to turn me into a French?" he joked and she giggled.

"Please, you're forty percent Puerto Rican and fifty percent American."

"Ten percent are missing," he noticed.

"Ten percent talented," he put his hand on his chest, faking offense.

"Only ten percent talented?" he frowned, his mouth agape. "I'm terribly wounded, Miss Williams."

"Perhaps ten percent modesty should be better," she sneered and he laughed.

"Okay, okay, you win."

"Could you stop fidgeting ? I'm almost done."

"I'm sorry, I'm just excited. I only wear my hair in a bun, never in a braid," he giggled, reminding her of a child. That made her smile. "Can you take a picture please ?"

"Yeah sure."

           She showed it to him and he gasped.

"Damn, it's beautiful !" he caressed it with his right hand. "You're quite good at this," he noted.

"My little sister's always asked me to braid her hair," she explained.

             He raised his eyebrows in surprise.

"You have a little sister ?"

"Yes and a little brother," she nodded.

"How old ?" he asked as he turned around, still sitting, so he could look at her better.

"They're both 21. Twins," she held two fingers up.

"Twins really ? How come you never talked to me about them ?" she shrugged.

"I don't know, you never really asked," she chuckled. "It's just that... talking about them hurts a little bit because I don't see them anymore. I last saw them last Christmas."

"How about this Christmas ? Are you going to visit them ?" he frowned. "Please, don't tell me you're spending Christmas alone."

"No, I'm not," she smiled. "I'm going back to France for two weeks."

"I wish I could go with you," he blurted out and she blinked. "I mean, to France. I've never been there," he admitted, scratching the back of his neck, obviously embarrassed by with quick tongue. "I'm pretty sure you'd be a great guide, right ?" she nodded. "You could take me to the prettiest place. And show me your home town."

"It's not THAT good, you know," she admitted.

"I don't care."

_I want to see the place where you grew up. Where you became the woman who stands before me now._

"I could take you to Paris," she offered, perfectly knowing that the capital was a must do for foreigners.

              He shook his head and gently took her hand.

"You are Paris," he softly spoke and she couldn't help the chills to run down her spine.

              He looked at her with such a raw sincerity that she felt her soul naked in front of him.

"Soon you'll be a starlet of the silver screen, you'll see. You're destined to do great things," he promised. "I know this."

"How can you be so sure ?" she whispered, her eyes wide.

              Her mother had always believed in her, of course. She had never doubted her daughter's talent. But Lin ? He was taking it to a whole new level. He beamed at her and she felt her resolve crumble.

"Because I feel it here," he said, placing her hand on his heart. "I'm never wrong when I feel it here."

"I won't disappoint you then."

"You could never disappoint me, Lilibeth," he replied and leaned in, making her froze.

_No._

             She put her hand on his mouth and kissed it.

"That's the closest thing to kissing me you can get, Miranda," she whispered, her eyes wide.

             She shivered when she saw the look on Lin's face. Never before had she seen such hunger in a man's eyes, especially directed toward her. He then frowned and gently caressed her face. _I could grow used to this_ , she thought.

"Please, Elizabeth," he breathed, making her shiver.

               It was the first time he had called her full name.

"Allow me to have one kiss."

           She shook her head.

"One."

_Yes._

"We'll kiss all the time with Hamilton," she lamely replied.

"Not that kind of kiss."

"That's not right... I can't..."

 _Y_ _es._

"Just one kiss, and we'll never talk about it again," he promised and she stared into his bright brown eyes.

_Yes._

          There was a sincerity in his eyes that she found heart-breaking. She swallowed hard. _Yes._ He must have heard her because he immediately pressed his lips against hers. She had dreamt many times about her first kiss with LinL. A real kiss, not a _Hamilton_ one. None of her fantasies could compare with this.  
How could someone be as gentle and eager as him ? His thumb gently stroked her cheek as he deepened the kiss while his other hand found her lower back and pressed her firmly against him. He tasted like coffee and it almost made her smile. He tasted sweet.

      For Lin, it felt like heaven. Her sweet pink lips, that were getting redder as they kept on going, were soft and delicate. She tasted like candy, probably because she nibbled something when she had made her way back to their room.  
       He explored her mouth, tasting her, remembering how it felt like, perfectly knowing that it was his only chance. He wouldn't blow it. He intended to make the most of it. He needed to memorize her scent, her taste, the shape of her lips, because he knew he would never capture them again. _Not like this._

      When they broke away, Lin couldn't breathe anymore. Their love looked wondrous on her swallowed lips. Their forbidden love. What a fool. How could he be satisfied with only a kiss from the woman he truly loved ?  
      The words were unspoken but there were there nonetheless. She blinked a couple of times and cleared her throat. She whispered that she was tired and that she needed to sleep.

_No._

      Regretfully, he let her go and laid on his bed, facing her, or rather, facing her back. She didn't want to turn. Because she knew that if she did, in the state of mind she was, even if she would just catch a glimpse of his eyes, she would give herself to him.  
       But she couldn't. She could never be satisfied. She was okay with that. She had been his for the length of a kiss. And him hers. That was be enough.

 _For now_.

 

* * *

 

Come talk to me on my [tumblr](https://tinywhim.tumblr.com/).

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Your comments and kudos mean the world to me.


	15. RENEE'S COOKIES

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hamilton rehearsals begin. Lilibeth gets a call from her mother.

"So what do you think ?"

       The rehearsals had started today with the first read through. Lilibeth already knew that it was going to be a busy week. But she was delighted to see the whole musical coming around. Her day had well started with her coming to the theatre to have Daveed waiting with a coffee. She didn't question how he knew her coffe order when she thanked him. They simply sat on the stairs and quietly sipped their hot drinks.  
      It was early and they knew they would spend the whole day in the theatre. Some of them, like Chris, Daveed and Lin already knew the drill, so it was comforting and reassuring to have them around.

"About the drinks tonight ?" you asked and he nodded. "Who's coming again ?"

"Well, Anthony, Jazzy, Oak, Leslie and Chris."

"What about..." she caught herself and cleared her throat. "Renée ? Can't she come ?"

"Nope. She promised Brielle and Benjamin that she would come home early."

"Sweet kids."

           She had met them a couple of times and they were a delight to have around. The curly haired man nodded in agreement.

"Well, yeah I'm in. But we shouldn't go home too late, we have our first dance rehearsal tomorrow, right ?"

"Yup, 7:30 am; that's what they said."

"We're gonna die."

"Nah, we're not," he playfully nudged her shoulder. "We're tough. Aren't we, Miss Williams ?"

"Maybe, Mr. Diggs, maybe," she chuckled. "Where are we supposed to go tonight ?"

"Well I figured we could grab a bite and drinks. We'll be done here by six."

"Yeah but we have to make a reservation, right ? I mean, because we're many."

"I can call if you want. We just have to see with the others where they'd like to eat. There's... Le Rivage."

"Sea food restaurant ?"

"Nope. Not even close."

"Hey guys !" Chris greeted them as he arrived.

"Hey, Chris. Say, you'd be interested in a restaurant tonight ? Before we go grab a drink ?"

"Hum... I'll have to text Veronica about it though. Do you have any place in mind ?"

"Le Rivage."

"Oh, I've been there ! It's pretty good and quite cosy."

"See Lilibeth ? I told you," the curly haired man smirked as she rolled her eyes.

"Are the others okay with this ?"

"We haven't asked yet. I'm pretty sure Anthony will go where Jazzy goes," they all chuckled. "I'll text the other on the group conversation."

 

> **[Hamfam]**
> 
> **French Baguette : Hey guys, how about we grab a bite before grabbing a drink tonight ? Le Rivage ?**
> 
> **YaBoy : What's that ?**
> 
> **The General : It's really good, I've been there before. It's a cosy restaurant not far away from the theatre.**
> 
> **And PEGGY : I'll follow our general's order. I'm in.**
> 
> **YaBoy: I'm in**
> 
> **ActualMom : Sorry, I promised my kids I'll be home early tonight, have fun tho !**
> 
> **Mr.Write : I'm in.**
> 
> **Burrn : I can grab a bite but not a drink after.**
> 
> **Oakenshield : I'm in**
> 
> **ActualMom : But don't come home too late, remember we have a rehearsal tomorrow morning.**
> 
> **Subway girl : Yes mom.**
> 
> **FrenchBaguette : Yes mom**
> 
> **Mr. Write : Yes mom.**
> 
> **Oakenshield : Yes mom.**
> 
> **YaBoi: Yes mom.**
> 
> **ActualMom : Omg please stop.**
> 
> **And PEGGY : Yes mom.**
> 
> **Groffsauce : Can I come too ?**
> 
> **Burrn : Yes mom.**
> 
> **Mr. Write : yes mom. AND YES GROFFSAUCE YOU CAN.**
> 
>  

* * *

 

"Okay, so welcome to the first read through of Hamilton with the Broadway cast," Tommy greeted.

               They were all seated in circle, with a music stand in front of them.

"Piano will be played by Alex Lacamoire," everyone cheered as he waved. "Here on my left we have Alexander Hamilton, played by Lin-Manuel Miranda," everyone clapped. "Then we have Aaron Burr, played by Leslie Odom Jr," they clapped once again and he introduced the whole cast until he finished with the red head. "And finally, Elizabeth Schuyler played by Lilibeth Williams."

             Daveed winked at her.

"Now, children if you have done your homework properly and I hope you did, this first read through will be a mix of rapping and of singing, so I hope you came prepared."

                Everyone chuckled.

"Well, let's start then, with _Alexander Hamilton._ Alright folks ?"

       It was the beginning of a new adventure. A long journey where common people would become Broadway stars, where they would explore a new part of themselves, where they would form bounds and attachements to one another. Lilibeth was thrilled.  
      She adored Christopher's voice and being able to sing with him simply was amazing. Everyone in the room was talented, especially the ensemble. Tommy explained them that some songs might be revised, because there was a lot of swearing but that once it was done, they would record it. They had to wait for the critics first.

       Lilibeth was overjoyed. She had never actually recorded a song in a professional studio. Sure she had assister her mother when she recorded her albumbs, but nothing more. She was already excited about the whole thing. _Everything starts now._ She looked back at her life before she met Lin. She'd liked it. She had a job she loved with her friend she got along well with, she had her subway and her covers. But now ? Everything seemed so unreal.

       She couldn't help but laugh at the series of ' _hey_ ' from Burr and Hamilton during _A Winter's ball._ And most importantly, Lin's constant wiggling of eyebrows. Would she be able to keep a straight face on stage ? What if she randomly began to laugh because of Lin's funny faces ? Or voice intonations ? She really hoped she wasn't going to mess up.

"Okay guys, end of the first act," Tommy clapped his hands. "We're going to take a break so you can rest a little bit."

              Lilibeth sighed and sank into her seat.

"You alright ?" Lin asked her.

"Yeah, it's quite exhausting. And it's just the read through."

"Wait until you have to learn the whole choreography and everything."

"Oh kill me already."

"Who's gonna kill you ?" Daveed asked as he approached her. "Cause I won't let anyone do that."

"Oh... aren't you just sweet ?" she smirked and he flashed her a charming smile.

"I try my best."

                Lin cleared his throat to remind them of his presence.

"So, Le Rivage tonight ?" the Puerto Rican asked.

"Yup. Chris told us it's pretty cool and it's not far away from here."

"We can always go to the Chélie after," Lilibeth offered and the curly haired man smiled. "To grab a drink."

"I'd love to come back there."

"Back ? So you've already been there ?" Lin asked, curious.

"Yep. Lilibeth took me there to show me the whole 'sing on the stage' thing on Friday," he frowned, feeling somehow betrayed by the red head. "Tim's a pretty good guy."

"You say that because last time he offered you a beer," Lilibeth sneered and Daveed chuckled.

"Hey, I'm not one to turn down free booze."

"I bet you aren't."

"I'm wondering if it's going to be a boy or a girl."

                  Lin raised his eyebrows. _So he knew about Tim and Penelope's bet too ?_

"A boy, I hope. Like that, Rosa will have a little brother," she smiled.

"Guys !"

                They turned their head to see Renée coming toward them with a small Tupperware.

"I made some cookies, you want some ?" she offered them.

"Oh dear God Renée, yes please !" Lin exclaimed as he threw himself on the pastries.

"Hey, hey Lin calm down, everyone must have one, okay ?"

"Yes mom," he whined and Lilibeth hid her smile behind her hand.

                 Daveed looked at her.

"They're really good, Renée," the latter thanked as he took a bite.

"That's true," the red head agreed. "You're putting my mother's cookies to shame."

"I'm putting a French woman's cookies to shame ? Damn I am good."

              They all chuckled.

"Hey I'm going to grab a coffee, anyone's interested ? My treat," Lin offered as he got up.

"You sure ? We're a lot," Lilibeth asked.

"And I'm the broke ass," Daveed chuckled under his breath, only for her to hear.

                She playfully slapped his shoulder.

"Shut up," she turned back to Lin. "I can come with you if you want. You'll need extra hands."

                 The Puerto Rican smiled gratefully at her as he took everyone's order.

"I'm surprised you offered to come with me," Lin admitted as they were walking outside.

"Why's that ?"

"Well you know, because of..."

_The kiss._

"We are both adults, Lin. I'm not going to avoid you or anything. We both said that we would pretend that nothing happened and that's what I'm doing. Regardless of this, you are still my friend," she honestly replied and he smiled.

"I'm glad, then."

                They entered the coffee shop and Lin gave the order. The waitress even offered them to put all the beverages in a large bag so they wouldn't have to carry too many coffees in their hands. He left her a generous tip as an apology for such a long order.

"So, how are you feeling ? Hamilton is here," he asked as they were waiting.

"I'm excited. I love singing with everyone here. I love Eliza, I mean... she was incredible and selfless and so... so kind. It's an honour to be able to be her on stage. But I have to admit that I'm a little bit nervous. I'm lucky because I don't rap, thank God. But Eliza is so important to the story, I can't mess up."

"You won't. There's a reason it's called _Hamilton_ and not Alexander Hamilton," he gently smiled as he looked at her. "It's your story too, Lilibeth."

"I still don't understand how you managed to write all of this," she confessed.

"A lot of coffees and sleepless nights were involved," he chuckled and she couldn't help but join in.

"L and L order ?" the waitress called.

                 The red head arched an eyebrow at the appellation.

"L and L, really ?"

"What ?"

                  They took the two bags and left the coffee shop.

"That's silly."

"You're only saying that because you're jealous you're not the one who got the idea," he retorted as he held the door for her.

"Not at all. You're just being silly."

"Ha but you love me !" he stuck out his tongue at her and she froze.

_But ya love me ? Right Lilibeth ?_

"Earth to Lilibeth ? Is everything alright ?"

"Y-yeah. I'm just cold."

"Then we must hurry !" he said as he quickly grabbed her hand. "I don't want you to get sick ! Can you imagine ?"

"Wait Lin !"

       She couldn't help but giggle as he tried his best to walk fast and not make a mess with the drinks. She sighed in relief when they finally arrived but that didn't mean that he let go of her hand as they stepped into the main room.  
       She didn't mind until she felt Daveed's eyes on her and quickly she felt it on their intertwined hands. She tried to get free of Lin's grasp but it didn't look like he wanted to let go.

"Lin, I need my hand back," she whispered into his ear.

"Oh shit, I'm sorry Lilibeth," he apologized and let her go.

"It's alright."

               She gave everyone their drinks and kept Daveed's for the end. She approached him and sat down next to him.

"There you go, Mr. Age of Enlightment."

                He looked at her for a couple of seconds before his lips broke into a grin.

"Well thank you, Miss Williams."

"Excited for tonight ?"

"Of course I am, I get to spend more time with you."

"And here I was going to say that I'm hungry so I can't wait to eat..." she mumbled and he laughed out loud, catching Lin's attention.

              Even though he was at the other side of the room and talking to Tommy, his eyes were on them.

"What ? It's not funny."

"And here I thought you enjoyed spending time with me..." he dramatically sighed.

"But I do enjoy spending time with you !" she exclaimed, perhaps a little too loud.

"Well, that's nice to know, Lilibeth," he poked the tip of her nose, making her smile.

"Is everything alright, Lin ?" Tommy asked as he saw his friend deeply frown.

"Hum ?"

"Is everything alright ?"

"Oh, yeah, yeah. I was just thinking about the show..." he smoothly lied.

"When am I going to go back to your house so I can kick your ass ?" the curly haired man questioned as he took a sip of his drink.

"Because you really think that you'll kick my ass ? Not in a million years. Mario Kart's my game."

"I'm asking for a revenge."

"Fine. Tomorrow night. You bring beer."

"And pizza."

"Not I'm paying for the food."

"Guess nothing can stop me from coming with food too."

             She stared at him for a couple of seconds.

"FINE," she huffed.

"Okay guys, time's up !" Tommy announced, clapping his hand. "We need to get over the Second Act !"

       Once they were all seated, Lilibeth took a deep breath, calming her nerve.  She couldn't help her smile froom growing wider as _What'd I miss ?_ started. She adored the song, how jazzy it sounded and she also adored Daveed's voice. She caught herself staring at him for a little too long when he was singing. How come ? She wanted to wonder, but she already had her idea.  
      It was probably coming from the fact that they grew quite close to each other for the past few weeks. They texted nonstop and sent each other memes all day long. They made vines together (as long as with Andrew Chapelle) grew quite popular. They were silly things, but they managed to make people laugh. And most importantly, they enjoyed making them together.

                What Lilibeth liked the most about Daveed was how sweet and soft he was. She had been quite surprised to know that he was someone prone to nervousness. He was such a talented man that caught her off guard because how could someone as talented as him could be so shy sometimes ? It was a mystery.

                They spent quality time together, they both loved video games (no he still hadn't beaten her to Mario Kart) and most importantly, he was single. Not that she really wanted to go out with him. If he asked, she wasn't even sure how she'd reply, given what had happened with Lin.

                But Daveed was different. She could reach him. She could grab his hand in public and not be stressed about being seeing doing so. She could spend time with him without feeling guilty of cheating. She could be happy with him. She knew it.

                She also knew that he was interested in her. It was nothing official but all the flirting was more than enough. Yet, he respected her privacy and he never was too forward. He never went too far. He wanted to be her friend first.  
              She couldn't help but compare her relationship she had with Daveed with her relationship she had with Lin. Yes, they were friends but they had started off as something... more. But he had made himself clear and so did she.

            They could never be together. Not when he  was still with Vanessa. She felt guilty enough about the kiss. Now that she thought about it, she couldn't just wait for Lin to come around. Was he even going to come around ? She mentally shook her head. He would already had, if he'd wanted. And she deserved her share of happiness too, right ?

          She chased those thoughts away as she focused on her friends around them. It was incredible to hear everyone sing at once and most importantly, the musical was finally completed. At the end of the day, a lot of crying was involved. Whether they were tears of joy, sadness or exhaustion, no one really knew.  
      Renée made sure to comfort Anthony (who died twice during the show) with her cookies. They were the best thing in the world. Renée took Lilibeth's hand when they sang _Who lives, who dies, who tells your story,_ since it was quite an emotional song and the red head was glad that she did.

"Okay so if everything goes well, we'll be recording this in a couple of months," Tommy explained.

"So soon ?" Lilibeth asked.

"The sooner the better," he smiled. "Tomorrow, we'll start with costume fitting and a little bit of dancing. So rest well tonight, alright ?"

"Yes Tommy !" everyone replied.

            Once they were all done, they headed for Le Rivage, but not before kissing Renée goodbye.

"Are you ready, darlin' ?" Daveed smiled at her as she put her coat on.

"Yeah, I can't believe we're done," she sighed. "It's exhausting to sing the same songs over and over again."

"C'mon, you've only been doing that for a day. I've been doing this for almost two years."

"Well excuse me, your highness," she mocked. "I guess I'm not your twin."

"Unbelievable."

"What are you guys talking about ?" Jazz asked, joining her arm with Lilibeth's.

"Miss Williams here, was complaining about the play."

"I was not !"

"Yes you were !"

"I was not !"

"Yes you were !"

"Ohhh Anthony, aren't they cute ?" Jazz questioned to the man who was walking next to her. "They fight like an old married couple."

"Yes they are," he approved, smirking.

"Oh shut up," Lilibeth huffed. "Oak please, back me up."

               The man looked at her and chuckled.

"You're on your own for this one, Lilibeth."

"You suck at being good friend," she grumbled.

"Oh, you're immature," Daveed teased as he put his right arm around her shoulders.

"Your face is immature."

               They all laughed and entered the restaurant. Daveed approached the man behind the reservation desk.

"Hello sir, I called this morning for a group of 9 people ? Name's Diggs."

"Yes sir, right away," he nodded before leading them to a table.

"Thanks."

"You're welcome," he handed them the menus before leaving.

"Damn this looks good man," Oak moaned, ever so passionate about food.

"I have to agree with you," Lin replied as he was reading the menu.

"I told you it was a good place," Chris smiled, pleased with himself.

       As everyone ordered the drinks (at least two cocktails) and the food, they all chattered casually about work. Jasmine was as excited as Lilibeth to try the costumes on and even Johnathan was looking forward to see his King George costume. And about his crown. You should definitely see him in a crown.  
      Daveed was delighted to be seated next to Lilibeth. He spent most of the dinner talking to her. When Jasmine heard that they were going to play Mario Kart tomorrow night at her place, she begged her friend to let her join them and thus, Anthony had to come too.

       Lin's ears peaked up at the mention of this 'Mario kart night'. Was Lilibeth going to invite him ? He patiently waited during the whole dinner but not once had she mentioned it to him. He tried to forget it as he was reflecting on their relationship. He was glad that at least, she didn't avoid him. Yet, once again, it wasn't like her to do something like that.

       Ever since the kiss, he hadn't been able to get her out of his mind. He'd started thinking about his relationship with Vanessa and most importantly of their future. Before, it wasn't hard. He pictured himself married with her with at least two kids in a bigger flat.  
      But as time passed, he realized that he couldn't propose to her and most importantly there was the issue of children. They had talked about it before. Vanessa wasn't ready for them because of her work.

       He completely understood that. She was a brilliant lawyer and she was good at what she was doing. He knew that her work was very important to her. He wasn't against it at all. But when they had first gotten together, they both talked about having kids and she had told him that she wanted children too. Yet, lately, every time he tried to bring the subject, they would argue and he'd end up sleeping on the couch.

       He didn't want to pressure her into anything but time was passing by and he didn't want to have children when he was 50. Time was limited. This simple notion made him think. Was his time with Vanessa limited too ?  
      When he was with Lilibeth, he didn't have the impression that time was limited at all. With her he didn't need a fountain of youth, that was for sure. Maybe it was time for him to choose, to make a decision. He couldn't just keep acting the way he did with Lilibeth while still being in a relationship with someone else. Yet...

       He looked at Lilibeth and Daveed who were both leaning in as they were whispering to each other. They were close. They perfectly got along and they had many common interests. Lin clearly knew that his friend was interested in the French woman. Who wouldn't be, right ? What he didn't like was the fact that Lilibeth seemed to like him back.

          What was he thinking ? That with one kiss she'd be his ? That the kiss would have changed something between the two of them ? No, she wasn't like this. But he had hoped... of course he had hoped. Back to the hotel room he had felt her need, her hunger...  
      She had loved it. She had loved the kiss, the thrill of it, he was sure of that. How did he know ? It was rather simple, you can't fake an accelerated heartbeat and dilated pupils. She liked him. She _liked_ him. He was sure of it.

          Then how could she be so close to Daveed knowing that he was just right there ? A flash of Vanessa's smile at the grocery shop passed into his mind. Ah yes... because he had done the same. It was only a taste of his own medicine, wasn't it ?  
       What a selfish bastard he was... Vanessa was his girlfriend. Not Lilibeth. She shouldn't mean anything to him. She _couldn't_ mean anything to him. _Then why..._ Lilibeth beamed at Daveed as he showed her something on his phone. _Why does it hurt so much ?_

 

* * *

 

"Oh my god the stage is spinning," Lilibeth gasped, amazed.

"Yeah, you didn't know ?" Daveed said as they walked into the room.

"No !" she exclaimed with a wide smile on her face. "It's going to be awesome !"

"Of course it is."

"Okay guys !" Andy called once they were all gathered. "Today you'll see what we planned with the ensemble for the first act. This afternoon, some of you will have costume fitting sessions meanwhile. Good luck everyone !"

       Lilibeth was overjoyed. She looked at all the dancers and her friends with wide eyes. She had always loved dancing. She had no trouble catching up and she was a fast learner. Dancing was exhausting but she knew that the final result would be worth it.  
      She was beyond excited when she got called to try her costumes. She waved Daveed and Oak goodbye before leaving.

"Hello, I'm Paul, I'm working on your costume," the man greeter her as she entered the room.

"Oh, hi !" she smiled. "You're the one who's going to make me feel like a princess right ?"

"Absolutely," he chuckled. "I've been working on the Schuyler dresses for a while now," he explained. "I have to admit that I like that you're a red head."

"Really ? Why's that ?"

"Your hair will perfectly match the colour of your dress," he took the costume and showed her. "What do you think ?"

              Lilibeth's mouth dropped as she looked at the pale blue dress.

"You'll have eight dresses, maybe more. This one's the first act, _The Schuyler sisters_. For _Alexander Hamilton,_ almost everyone is wearing white costumes."

"I love it, Paul. It's so pretty."

"Get it in, so I can make some adjustments."

"Yes sir !" she grinned before going behind the room divider to get changed. "Will I need to wear a corset with that ?"

"I'll have to see. But if you do, it'll be one with which you can sing and dance. We don't want to suffocate you, dear."

           She stepped out and twirled around.

"Now, you look beautiful. Come closer."

            She did as she was told as Paul was getting some measurements.

"Alright, it looks good. I know what changes I have to make. Do you want to try your other dresses ?"

"Hell yes."

 

* * *

 

"Alors ma chérie, comment s'est passée ta répétition ? C'était bien ?" ( _So Honey, did your rehearsal go well ?_ )

"Oui maman. J'ai enfin pu essayer mes robes, elles sont vraiment jolies !" ( _Yes mum. I finally got to try my dresses, they're so pretty !_ )

"Est-ce que tu as pris des photos ?" ( _Did you take pictures ?_ )

"Non, j'ai totalement oublié, désolée..." ( _No, I compltely forgot, sorry..._ )

"Qu'est-ce que tu peux être tête en l'air, ma chérie," her mother sighed but there was no reproach in her tone. "Ça s'est bien passé ou sinon ?" ( _What a day dreamer you are, with your head in the clouds, Honey._ _Everything went well either way ?_ )

"Parfaitement ! On a un peu commencé à voir quelques mouvements pour les chorégraphies, et tu sais quoi ? La scène tourne !" ( _Perfect ! We just started a little bit of dancing moves for the choreography and you know what ?_ _The stage spins !_ )

"La scène tourne ?" ( _The stage spins ?_ )

"Oui ! En fait y a un espèce de cercle en plein milieu de la scène, et ça tourne. Ça va être magique maman. " ( _Yes ! Actually there a kind of circle in the middle of the stage and it spins. It's gonna be magical mum._ )

"Au moins tu t'amuse !" she chuckled. "Comment vas Lin ?" ( _At least you're having fun !_ _How is Lin ?)_

"Fidèle à lui même. Il est très excité que les répétitions aient commencé. Il saute de partout, je me demande d'où lui vient cette énergie." ( _True to himself. He's really excited that the rehearsals have started. He's jumping around all the time, I wonder where all this energy comes from._ )

"Et comment ça va entre vous ?" the red head rolled her eyes. ( _And how is it going between the two of you ?_ )

"Il n'y a rien entre nous, maman." ( _There's nothing between us, mom._ )

"Et pourtant je te connais mieux que ça, Lilibeth. Tes sentiments ont-ils changé ?" ( _And yet I know you better than that, Lilibeth. Have your feelings changed ?_ )

"C'est compliqué. Tu le sais, il a une copine. Alors j'ai laissé tombé." ( _It's complicated._ _You know it, he has a girlfriend. So I gave up._ )

"Fais juste attention à toi, d'accord mon Coeur ?" ( _Just be careful, alright love ?_ )

"Oui maman, ne t'inquiète pas. Et comment vont Molly et Atlas ?" ( _Yes mum, don't worry. And how are Molly and Atlas ?_ )

"Ça va. La tête dans les études. Atlas travaille dur son violon et Molly travaille dur ses cours." ( _Alright. Their head buried in their studies. Atlas is working hard on his violin and Molly her classes._ )

"Ça me manque d'entendre Atlas jouer..." she sighed, wistfully. ( _I miss hearing Atlas play..._ )

"Il y a un concours, début Janvier. Il y travaille dur et il aurait besoin d'un accompagnateur." ( _There's a competition at the beginning of January. He's working hard and he needs an accompanist._ )

"Il ne m'en a pas parlé." ( _He didn't tell me about it._ )

"Simplement parce que je l'ai devancé." ( _Only because I told you first._ )

"Maman !" ( _Mom !_ )

"Quoi ? Tu me connais, j'adore les surprises." ( _What ? You know me, I love surprises._ )

"Tu sais quand est-ce ? Parce qu'en Janvier on va commencer à jouer Hamilton Off-Broadway normalement." ( _Do you know when it is exactly ? Because in January, we'll start performing Hamilton Off-Broadway._ )

"Il me semble que c'est le 8." ( _I think it's on the eighth._ )

"Je pense que je pourrais venir. Est-ce qu'il veut de moi ?" ( _I think I'll be able to come._ _Does he actually want me ?_ )

"Lilibeth, tu es une des meilleures pianistes qu'il y a sur cette terre," her mother replied with a firm voice. "Tu es le meilleur accompagnement qu'un violoniste peut rêver avoir." ( _Lilibeth you are one of the best pianist on Earth. You are the best accompanist a violinist could ever dream to have._ )

"Tu veux qu'il gagne, n'est-ce pas ?" ( _You want him to win, don't you ?_ )

"Je sais qu'il va gagner. Tout comme tu as gagné toi aussi. Vous allez gagner, parce que je ne vous ai pas appris à autre chose." ( _I know he's going to win. Just like you did before him. You are going to win, because I did not teach you anything else._ )

"J'avais oublié à quel point tu étais compétitive." (I _forgot how competitive you can get._ )

"Ce n'est pas en mal, crois-le bien. Je sais que vous avez les capacités pour réussir, Lilibeth." ( _I mean no harm, you know it. I know that you have what it takes to succeed, Lilibeth_.)

"On tient ça de toi," her mother chuckled. "Ne t'inquiète pas maman. On te rendra fière." ( _We got it from you._ _Don't worry mom, we'll make you proud_.)

"J'ai toujours été fière de vous." ( _I've always been proud of you.)_

 

* * *

 

Come talk to me on my [tumblr](https://tinywhim.tumblr.com/).

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Your comments and kudos give me life.


	16. THE FRENCH WAY

    The rehearsals were exhausting. Lilibeth knew that working in a musical was tough, but she had no idea that she would barely have time to sleep. (She did, but late-night conversations with Daveed until 3 AM didn’t help at all) She often slept in her lounge, which she shared with Jasmine and Renée. Jasmine who spent most of her time in Anthony and Oak’s lounge, hanging out with her boyfriend.  
     Lilibeth didn't mind having the room all for herself. She could rest in peace while reading a book or scrolling on twitter. They had learned most of the dancing, which she had absolutely loved and their costumes were almost all done. She remembered the first time she had seen Daveed in his Thomas Jefferson suit. He looked… Smoking hot. The man was so tall and he looked absolutely dashing in it. 

        Being part of _Hamilton_ felt like a rollercoaster ride. The show was spectacular and everyone was thrilled and nervous. No one wanted to mess up during the show, so they all worked very hard. Lilibeth had a hard time waking up at 5 AM for the rehearsals. She almost regretted working on a song from ten to midnight last night.

 

“Hello, beautiful,” Daveed greeted when he opened the door.

 

“I was actually going to say that,” Lilibeth smirked and he laughed. 

 

“You’re cute,” he poked her nose. “Do you have anything planned tonight?”

 

"I’m definitely going to see how many marshmallows I can fit in my mouth. What about you?”

 

“That actually sounds wonderful. Mind if I join you?” he chuckled. “Although I was going to offer you to grab a drink, after the rehearsal?”

 

“Sure thing.”

 

“Perfect. It’s a date then.”

 

            She slowly smiled at how it sounded more like a question than an affirmation. She had to find her own happiness, didn’t she?

 

“It’s a date.”

* * *

        Lilibeth felt incredibly excited when they reharsed. She loved the spinning stage and the whole thing during _Satisfied_ was insane. It definitely was one of her favorite parts. Boy, people weren’t ready for that. She also loved the duels, how they played with the spinning stage was absolutely incredible. Lilibeth twirled into her blue dress, laughing on stage.  
      They were trying out costumes and seeing whether it was convenient to dance with it. She wished she could wear the same uniform as Washington’s men, with the beautiful blue coat.

      She knew she would rock it in it. Alas, Eliza Schuyler was a lady and thus, couldn’t dress as such. Yet in her dress, she did feel like a princess. She slightly blushed when she saw how Lin was looking at her. She had to admit that he looked perfect in all his costumes. She loved him when he had the blue coat on or the emerald suit. (She did like it better when he still wore the beige pants with it, during _Non-stop._ )

 

“I think you perfectly play Eliza.”

 

                Startled, she turned her head to see Renée next to her.

 

“Sorry, what was that?”

 

“The way you look at Alexander, during the rehearsal, it’s very convincing.”

 

“Ah, thank you," she adverted her eyes. "I mean, she really loved him right?” she looked at Lin once again. “Even though he wasn’t really around, always working. Even when he found comfort in the bed of another woman, she forgave him,” she clenched her fists. “She must have loved him a lot.”

           

                 Lin slightly smiled at her and she couldn’t help but reciprocate. At least, she could love him on stage, couldn’t she?

 

“You know, there are moments where words don’t reach.”

 

                  Lilibeth looked at her friend, catching the subtle reference from her own lyrics, who only gave her a knowing smile before she left. Once she was back in her normal clothes she left her lounge, looking for Daveed. While she was walking in the corridors she was stopped by Jasmine. Ever so beautiful Jasmine.

 

“So I heard that someone is going on a date tonight?” she teased as she approached Lilibeth.

 

              The redhead's eyes grew wide as she turned her head to see that Lin was still talking to Anthony, leaning on the wall. He didn’t hear. Good.

 

“Daveed told me that he was going to take you out. That’s nice.”

 

“Yeah. I have no idea where we’re going, though.”

 

“Trust him with that kind of thing. He has _very_ good taste,” Jasmine nodded affirmatively. “Are you going to wear something sexy?”

 

“What do you mean? What’s wrong with my clothes?” she asked, confused. 

 

“C’mon, it’s Daveed we’re talking about. He deserves more than this,” she gestured to the plain t-shirt and jeans. 

 

“I’m not going to dress up to the nines just to grab a drink after work.”

 

“But…”

 

“Hello, ladies, what’s up?” Lin asked, smoothly sliding into the conversation. 

 

“Lin, please, be honest,” Jasmine asked before Lilibeth could open her mouth. “Do you think that this,” she gestured once again to her friend’s adornment. “Is good enough for a date?”

 

               His eyes fell on the redhead.

 

“You have a date?”

 

             Lilibeth hated how disappointed he sounded and how she could see the hurt in his eyes. She merely nodded, not trusting her voice to speak. 

 

“Lin?” Jasmine tried to catch his attention again.

 

“I’m sorry, come again?”

 

“Her clothes? For a date with Daveed?”

 

“No, it’s perfect. You look perfect,” he cleared his throat. “Anyway, don’t drink too much though, we have a rehearsal tomorrow morning.  Make sure you both arrive on time,” he spoke before leaving.

 

“Sure thing Boss,” Jasmine mimicked a salute. “But please, change at least your t-shirt.”

 

“I hate you Jas.”

 

“You wish.”

 

                   She left her friend and knocked on Daveed’s door. 

 

“Yeah come in.”

 

                   She did as she was told and froze when she saw him shirtless.

 

“Damn…” whe breathed as she looked at the curly-haired man.

 

               He wasn’t just hot, Jesus, he was fucking _ripped_. 

 

“Looking at something you like ?” he teased and she smirked. 

 

“Maybe.” 

* * *

 

       Lin was annoyed. Knowing that tonight Lilibeth was going on a date disturbed him. He knew that it shouldn’t because he had no say in it. _But it doesn't mean that I have to like it._ He had known it for a quite while now that Daveed was attracted to Lilibeth and that he really liked her. Everyone with common sense would be attracted to Lilibeth. But the fact that she was reciprocating his feelings left Lin crestfallen. 

 

          But was he supposed to do? Forbid her from seeing someone? He couldn’t. He had no say in it.  He had made his bed and he had to lay in it. It didn’t change the fact that every time Lilibeth laughed at one of Daveed’s jokes, his heart broke. He should have never found himself in this situation in the first place.

   

       He sighed when he saw that Vanessa wasn’t home. She was probably still working with Mike, once again. He couldn’t help the feeling of loneliness spread into his stomach as he sat in his office. He smiled bitterly as he looked at a picture of Lilibeth on his phone. She probably was having the time of her life with one of his closest friends while he was there, being completely miserable. 

 

               He considered calling Alex for advice, but then again, what would he say? There was nothing he would say that Alex didn’t know. He only had asked Lin to be careful with Lilibeth because he didn’t want to see her get hurt.

 

_My dearest, Vairon,_

 

_Your actions, as detached to my poor self as they can be, are the cause of many of my torments. Seeing you in the arms of another’s is the most agonizing view I have to endure. I am not sure I could ever accept it. You see, when it comes to you, my love, I am a selfish man. I want you to be mine and mine only. How hard it is for me to see you smile to someone else. I took pride in being the cause of your happiness because, for a little while, I knew I was. But not anymore, am I right ?_

_You once asked me about Say no to this and I lied. I told you that nothing got me inspired to write it. But I lied. I wrote it about you. I wrote it the very same night I walked your drunken-self home. Because I definitely understood Hamilton’s struggle, when I found myself in this situation. I said no. I said no to this. But God… it was probably the hardest no I've ever had to say. I couldn’t take advantage of you like this, I would have never forgiven myself in the morning. And I’m pretty sure you wouldn’t have too._

_Yet at night I find myself fantasying about your warm body undermine, your soft lips on my neck and about all the pretty names you could call me in bed. I would be so gentle with you because you deserve nothing less. I have so much love to offer you, Lilibeth. More than any man on Earth. I am sure of it._

_I fear greatly to talk to you about all of this, about my feelings especially now, considering that you have someone else in your life. But I have to. I cannot contain those affections any longer and you need to be informed of their depth. I do not want you to hate me. I have this feeling that those affections could be reciprocated. Because if they weren’t, you wouldn’t have kissed me in that hotel room, you would? I still have hope for us Lilibeth. And I am ready to make the right choices to honor us._

 

_Remembering us the way we should be,_

_Lin._

* * *

 

“I was quite nervous that you would refuse.”

 

       Daveed had taken her to a pub specialized in infused rum since he knew that she really liked this kind of drink. It was nice not to be behind the counter and it did feel weird. Apart from the Chélie, she didn’t really grab drinks in other bars. It was quite small but they had managed to find seats. Being exhausted because of the rehearsal she had begged him to go somewhere they could sit and relax. 

   

       They were both having a good time and none of them were surprised. Ever since the karaoke night, they texted a lot. It turnrf out that they had the same taste in terms of movies and TV shows. Daveed implored her to tell him about France. He had always wanted to visit but never quite got the chance. She promised him she would take him there one day. He looked beyond pleased. 

 

“Really? Why’s that?”

 

“Because of Lin.”

 

             She nearly spat her drink. 

 

“I’m sorry?”

 

“I mean… I saw how you two are close. I just thought that something was happening between the two of you.”

 

“Nope. Not at all,” she smoothly lied. “I mean, he has a girlfriend.”

 

“Believe me, being a relationship doesn’t mean that you can’t be attracted to someone else. I mean, I've already been through this.”

 

“What happened?” she asked.

 

“There was this girl I really liked, but she already had someone. But, we had good chemistry, you know?”

 

             She nodded. She perfectly understood. _Just like Lin and I._

 

“But in the end, she had to make a choice. And she chose him.” 

 

“Didn’t she love you ?”

 

“I guess she loved him more.”

 

“Did you hate her for this?”

 

“No. The heart wants what the heart wants. I couldn’t blame her for that.”

 

“I’m sorry,” Lilibeth replied as she squeezed his hand in comfort.

 

               He smiled. 

 

“That’s okay, that was years ago, I’m over it now.”

 

“But I don’t understand how you could be nervous about me since you asked me on dates before?”

 

“Well… They weren’t really dates, were they? I mean… They were but… it’s not the same.”

 

“Why?”

 

“Because… I like you,” he shrugged it off, trying to act cool. “I don’t want them to be the same kind of dates.”

 

“Oh.”

 

“Oh?” he repeated.

 

“I mean, we are close, that I can agree on, but I mean… I never thought of you as anything but a friend before.”

 

“And now?”

 

              She stared at him for a couple of seconds. 

 

“I don’t know, you tell me.”

 

“Oh, so I get to choose how our relationship will develop?” he cracked a smile. “Now that’s interesting.”

 

“As long as I have a say in it,” she chuckled. 

 

“I can arrange that.”

 

            He leaned in and gently kissed her. 

 

            It felt so different from kissing Lin. It was sweet and peaceful. Back in the hotel room, she remembered how messy and demanding their kiss was. She chased that thought away. She shouldn’t be thinking about Lin while she was kissing Daveed. 

 

“How was that?”

 

“Pretty nice,” she grinned, making him laugh. 

 

“Pretty nice? Wait a minute, I’m sure I can do better than just ‘ _pretty nice._ ’”

* * *

 

“How was your date with Daveed?”

 

       Lilibeth was currently lying on her couch in her lounge. She’d been so exhausted because of the rehearsals. She knew she had to give her all but she had no idea that it would be this tiring. For the past days, she’d been reading _The picture of Dorian Gray_ .  
       She had read it many times, but Oscar Wilde had his own special way to come back into her life at the most unexpected times. She just loved this author. She gazed up to see Lin. She didn’t even hear him coming into the room. Jasmine had long left to see her boyfriend and Renée was nowhere to be seen.

 

“Great," she replied, her eyes falling back on her book.

 

             Even though he was silent, she knew that there was something he wanted to say. 

 

“ _The world is changed because you are made of ivory and gold,_ ” Lin kneeled next to her and gently lifted up her chin so that she would look at him. “ _The curves of your lips rewrite history,_ ” he quoted, not knowing that it was her favorite quote from the book.

          

            He gently caressed her face and kissed her forehead.

 

“What are you doing?” she questioned, frowning slightly, ignoring how her blush was trying to make its way to her cheeks. 

 

“You never complied about me kissing you before.”

 

“Yes, but that was before Daveed.”

 

“Do you think that it’s going to work with him?” he suddenly asked. 

 

“Why are you so interested?”

 

“I think you know.”

 

“Well, you don’t see me asking you about every date you have with Vanessa,” she retorted, frowning.

 

“Lilibeth, please,” Lin groaned and ruffled his hair.

 

“Why do you want to know?”

 

“I mean I don’t understand how you can go on a date while we…”

 

“While we what? Tell me, Lin. Please, do tell me what’s happening between us.”

 

“I… I don’t know,” he sighed, frustrated.

 

“No. You don’t know because nothing is happening. Because nothing should be happening.”

 

“But things _happened_.”

 

“Yes, but we said that we wouldn’t talk about it again.”

 

              He deeply sighed.

 

“Lilibeth, I don’t want things to be awkward between us,” Lin pleaded. 

 

“Me neither,” she agreed.

 

“We’ll have to kiss a lot with the incoming shows. And I mean… It’s not like we haven’t done it before.”

 

“We said that we weren’t supposed to talk about it,” she reminded him.

 

“But I want to talk about it,” he retorted. 

 

“You promised-”

 

“I know what I promised!” he exclaimed, losing his patience. “But I can’t! I can’t Lilibeth. It’s killing me! Seeing you with Daveed made me realize that I can’t do it anymore,” his eyes were dangerously red by now. “I can’t keep on going, pretending that everything is fine when it's not. I can’t pretend that I don't care about you and that my affections are purely friendly.”

 

“Lin don’t…”

 

“But I have to, don’t I?” he whispered. “I have to get it out of my chest. I have to be honest and true. It’s only fair. Two things that I’ve been neglecting lately.”

           

            She looked down.

 

“Every time I kiss you on stage… I can’t deny it any longer. I can’t pretend it’s part of the show. Because it’s not. Not for _me_.”

 

“Lin…”

 

“I love you, Lilibeth,” he declared.

 

             She stared at him with her eyes wide.

 

 _I love ya, Lilibeth._  

 

“No. No, you don’t.”

 

                   It wasn’t like the last time.

 

“Lilibeth, please…”

 

_I love you._

 

                This time, he was very sober.

 

“You don’t get to say it.”

 

_I love you._

 

“You have your girlfriend Lin.”

 

_I love you._

 

“You can’t go around and tell another girl that you love her.”

 

_I love you._

 

“But I do. I do love you,” he replied, leaning closer to her. “And I know that you love me too.”

 

“No, I don’t,” she firmly lied, she almost believed herself.

 

“You can’t lie to me, Lilibeth,” he softly spoke. “Not about this. Especially about this.”

 

“You. Have. A. Girlfriend.”

 

“Say one word and she’s gone.” 

 

“What the fuck?” she stood up, almost making him fall on his butt. “You can’t say things like that Lin!”

 

“B-But…”

 

“I’m trying to find my own happiness! Don’t you dare come to ruin it!” she spat, tears threatening to fall.

 

                   How could he say such things? She had dreamt of him saying such things, but why now? When now when she had Daveed?

 

“How could you do this to me, Lilibeth?” 

 

“Are you fucking kidding me? How could I do this to you? The world doesn’t revolve around you, Lin!”

 

“But you can’t deny that we do have something Lilibeth!” he retorted. 

 

“Fucking watch me,” she growled. “You don’t see me tell you anything when you go back to Vanessa. You should do the same.”

 

                He looked down, almost ashamed. 

 

“I’m… sorry. I didn’t mean to…” he ruffled his messy hair. “I just thought that…”

 

“That what? That I would wait ?” she shook her head. “No Lin, I’m tired of waiting. I don’t want to spend my life waiting for you to come around.”

 

“I thought you liked me.”

 

“Why would it matter now?”

 

“It does matter to me!”

 

“I have every right to be happy too!” she screamed. “It doesn’t have to be with you!” 

 

       He stayed silent, taken aback.

 

“What did you except Lin? That I would stay single so that you could find comfort into my arms? That I would always be around for you to look for when you need it? I am not a second choice. I don’t want to be your second choice.”

 

“You’re not my second choice.”

 

“I am only playing your wife during the show, Lin,” she coldly reminded. “Not in your life.”

 

 “Lilibeth I’m sorry, I...” he apologized. 

 

“And we should keep it that way.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Your comments and Kudos give me life.


	17. YOUR LIPS PRESSED TO MY NECK

 

      What is worse than waking up because of your neighbours banging way too loud at four in the morning? Having to work with Lin in such conditions and most importantly, having to play _his wife_ when you were quite mad at him. God, but what was he thinking? Telling her that he loved her while being completely sober. 

 

       How could he do this? She couldn’t pretend it was a mistake now. She couldn’t pretend that these were just words thrown around. Why now? She was just fine with Daveed. The man was so sweet and so caring of her. She practically melted every time he smiled at her. 

 

       Lilibeth tried to chase away these thoughts as she got dressed. She didn’t need to think about Lin, she was only with him on stage. She only needed to think about _Hamilton._ She already knew that the musical was going to be a masterpiece. Her mom had promised to come for the Off-Broadway performance, so she got her a ticket. Unfortunately, the twins couldn’t come but they did promise that they would try their best to, one day. Maybe once they were in Broadway, officially. 

 

“ _Darlin’, you want me to drive you to the rehearsal today?_ ”

 

“Sure thing, if you don’t mind.”

 

“ _I don’t mind at all, look, open your door._ ”

              Her phone still pressed to her ear, Lilibeth got up to open her front door and smiled when she saw her curly-haired boyfriend with two coffees.  

 

“Oh my god, you are perfect.”

 

                    He chuckled and kissed her.

 

“I’m working hard to please my lady.”

 

“Let me grab my coat and then we can go!”

 

               Lin was always early for rehearsals. He liked it that way. He ignored the pang he felt in his chest when he saw Lilibeth walking in with Daveed, their hands laced together. Their relationship seemed to be hitting off pretty well from what he saw and what he heard. Lilibeth seemed happy. So he should be happy for her, right? Yet he wasn’t. It’d been a week since their talk into her lounge and things had never been so tense. They didn’t text anymore. They talked to each other only when necessary. 

   

Alex clearly sensed that something was wrong and when he tried to talk about it, they would both say that everything was fine. But Alex knew better. They were not fine at all. Yet, they were good actors, he had to admit it. They truly listened to his advice. They let nothing show, even through their eyes. It was as if nothing had ever happened between the two of them. 

 

“Guys come on, time to go on stage!”

 

“Okay!”

 

              What really hurt Lin was how a good actress Lilibeth was. Because she still perfectly played his Eliza, with the stage kisses, smiles, and loving looks. But Lin knew better than that. He knew that her eyes had changed. And every time he tried to talk to her, she gently brushed him off. She always had a good excuse not to talk to him.

 

                 It pained him. Because he knew it was his fault. He had no right to have spoken as he did. He had no right to prevent her from being happy. She was right, she deserved her own share of happiness, even if it killed him because it wasn’t with him. He couldn’t really offer her happiness, could he? His hands were tied but she was free to do whatever she wanted. Did she want to be with Daveed? Then so be it!

 

“Lin, is everything alright ?” Tommy asked him. “You seem a little off.”

 

“N-no, no, sorry. I was just thinking about something else. But I’m here.”

 

“Okay,” he nodded and turned to face everyone else. “We’ll focus on the beginning of the second act, alright children?”

“Yeah !” they all answered. 

 

      During the break between _What’d I miss_ and the first Cabinet battle, Daveed strode toward Lilibeth. She had her back turned to him, talking to Jasmine and he lifted her up. It earned him a giggle. He quickly pecked on her lips and smiled. Lin sadly frowned as he witnessed the whole scene because they both looked happy together. He’d give everything to be the cause of her happiness, to have her in his arms right now. 

 

“Are you alright Lin?” it was Renée who asked. 

 

“Yeah, I am.”

 

“Come on Lin, you’ve always been a better actor than this,” she teased but he could see the worry in her eyes. 

 

“I…”

 

              He silently looked at the laughing couple. 

 

“Whatever choices you could have made, it’s too late Lin,” she gently spoke. “She’s not alone anymore.”

 

“She wasn’t alone with me,” he whispered. 

 

“Yes, she was. You made her shine for a few moments,” she told him and looked at her friends. “Daveed can make her shine longer. And we both know that she deserves that.”

 

“I know that she does,” he frowned, defeated. “I just… I want her to be happy.”

 

“She looks happy,” Renée remarked as she watched the redhead who was beaming. 

 

“Is she really?” 

 

“Lin, you can’t destroy what she tries to build just because she’s not with you.”

 

“I’m not,” he denied.

 

“Jealousy does not suit you well, Lin,” she sighed. “Be careful, alright ?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

    Oh, he was looking forward to singing the first cabinet meeting, because he couldn’t wait to confront Daveed on stage, perfectly knowing that he’d be the one winning the argument. _But he’s the one who wins the girl, Lin._ Everything was all fine, Daveed played perfectly well and that’s what annoyed the Puerto Rican. He acted so cockily and smug and he couldn’t help but feel that he was taunting him.

 

_Lilibeth’s with me, not you._

 

**_Sitting there useless two shits, hey turn around, bend over, I’ll show you where my shoe fits._ **

 

      The way Lin spat these words seemed to surprise both Chris and Oak yet Daveed knew better. As they both started to run toward each other, Washington stepped in the middle and was quite surprised when he actually had to stop Alexander from punching Jefferson. As soon as the song was over, Lin fled to the bathroom under the questioning glances of his friends. 

   

 _You need to focus Lin!_ he thought as he ran some water on his face. _You can’t act like this. You’re not a child anymore. Snap out of it._ It was his job, he had to be professional. Lilibeth was professional, he had to do the same. And Daveed… Daveed was his friend. He had been a friend with him for several years now. He couldn’t act this way. He couldn’t be THAT selfish. 

   

       He adored Daveed. The man was sweet, talented, a good friend, you could always count on him no matter what. And it was how he repaid him? By being a bitch because he was in a couple with the girl he loved? No, he had to stop. Daveed had told him that he was interested in Lilibeth, a couple of weeks ago. He had told him how he’d like to ask her on a date, on a real date. But he didn’t know if he could because of him. 

 

       Lin had been surprised when Daveed told him that he had noticed how close they were to each other. But the Puerto Rican waved it off and told him that he could date her if he wanted. What else could he say? _No Daveed, don’t date the girl I’m utterly in love with, please. Piss off, find someone else. I was there first._ He couldn’t be ridiculous like this. He had to act like an adult. He remembered how happy Daveed was when he told her that he could go and get her. Who was he to deny them this happiness? 

 

        Was this what Lilibeth felt every time she saw him with Vanessa? Did she feel heartbroken for every kiss he deposed on his girlfriend’s lips? Did her soul shatter because of every smile that was not for her? How could he do this? How could he hurt her like this? What a fool he had been to think that he could be satisfied with Vanessa. He had known, deep down, that at some point they would reach a deadlock, for the same and exact reason they would always argue about. 

 

“Lin, you alright?”

 

                It was Alex. Wise, wise Alex.

 

“Yeah, I’m fine.”

 

“Then why did Chris have to stop you from punching Daveed in the face?”

 

“I wasn’t going to punch him in the face…” he lamely lied making his friend frown. 

 

“C’mon Lin, you better than to lie to me.”

 

“I… I’m sorry.”

 

          He wanted to ruffle his hair but since it was in a ponytail with a lot of hairspray and other products, there wasn’t much he could do. It only added to his frustration. 

 

“You don’t have to be sorry, you simply have to do your job,” his friend stated. “I know what’s troubling you but you told me that you were going to work it out.”

 

“I’m trying !”

 

“No, you’re not. You are simply taking your anger on Daveed, which is exactly what you shouldn’t do.”

 

            The Puerto Rican had the decency to look ashamed.

 

“You had your chance with Lilibeth, and you didn’t take it. But he did. You shouldn’t blame him for that.”

 

“I never had a chance with her,” he whispered, frowning. 

 

_Then you are the most stupid man alive for not having seen it._

 

“Lin, it doesn’t matter anymore, what matters is now. You really need to get a grip on yourself. She’s out of your reach now, you need to get used to it.”

 

“It’ll take time.”

 

“It’ll take time,” Alex agreed. “But you have to make some efforts. You want her to be happy, right ?”

 

“Yes,” he replied without missing a beat.

 

“At the moment, Daveed makes her happy. She is happy.”

 

 _Or so she tries._ Alex thought.

 

“Don’t take it away from her. She has suffered enough.”

 

“I didn’t mean to…” he sighed. “Ever since Cold Spring I can’t…”

 

“Cold Spring ?”

 

              Lin bit his lips, adverting his eyes. Couldn’t he just shut up for once? 

 

“I… Yeah we went to cold spring together, a couple of months ago.”

 

“And… ?”

 

           But it was Alex. Wise, wise Alex. 

 

“We…” he cleared his throat.

 

“Please, don’t tell me you slept together.”

 

“What?” he shrieked. “No! We kissed!”

 

           He blinked and so did Alex.

 

“We… We kissed.”

 

“How… How could you do this Lin ?” Alex asked, but there was no judgment in his voice. 

 

“You know-how. I had no intention at first,” he promised. “But she was just right there in front of me and she looked so perfect and I just had to kiss her because she had to understand what she means to me.”

 

“Oh, Lin…” he sighed. “You shouldn’t have…”

 

“I know…”

 

“You gave her hope while still being in a relationship. That’s not fair.”

 

“I know, I just… I just wanted her to understand… And now… She… she’s with someone else.”

 

“Just like you. Try to remember that, Lin, alright?”

 

           The Puerto Rican nodded.

 

“You can’t let this influence the way you work. We worked so hard for _Hamilton_ , we’re almost there.”

 

“I know, I know, you’re right. I’ll get over it,” he promised. 

 

“Good.”

 

* * *

 

    The rehearsal for today was over. Lilibeth couldn’t help but sigh in relief when she was out of her costume. She loved it, of course, but it wasn’t the most comfortable thing to wear all day long. And her feet were hurting her too, but hey, at least she perfectly knew the choreography. What Leslie did during _The room where it happens_ was way more complicated than her entire thing. So she couldn't really complain about it. 

   

       She tried to ignore how aggressive Alexander had been when he talked to Thomas. At first, she simply thought that he was just in character. It was common knowledge that Hamilton didn’t really like Jefferson after all. Yet, she knew better. When Lin fled after the first cabinet meeting, she had chased him. Because even though she was still mad at him for what he had told her back in her lounge, she couldn’t help but feel sad for him. 

   

        Of course, she was hurt too. She didn’t like to ignore him but what else was she supposed to do? He could be so thick sometimes! Of course, she loved him. Of course, she wanted to be with him, but she couldn’t. And she didn’t want to stand there, hoping that at some point he’d leave Vanessa to be with her. Daveed was there for her when Lin wasn’t. And that made a whole difference. 

   

        But what a surprise it was to be greeted with the voices of Lin and Alex, completely unaware that she was standing right there, behind the door. _You had your chance with Lilibeth and you didn’t take it._ Alex, wise, wise Alex was right. She had waited for him, but she couldn’t spend her life waiting for something that was never going to come. She had been shocked when Lin told their friend about the kiss, especially after they had agreed that nobody needed to know. What would Alex think of her now?  

   

         She tried to shrug away these thoughts as they went outside, revelling in the fresh air they were greeted with. She couldn’t help but smile as she watched Jasmine and Anthony being absolute darlings together. They were both holding hands, grinning like idiots at some stupid joke Daveed had just told them. Speaking of him, he was leaning against the wall with his arms around Lilibeth’s waist. She couldn’t help but smile at the warm feeling that spread through her entire body. 

 

“We did well, today,” Lin declared as he stretched himself.

 

               He felt slightly better after talking to Alex.

 

“I can’t believe we’re so close to introducing _Hamilton_ to the public.”

 

“Yeah, it feels so unreal,” Anthony nodded. “I’m glad to be part of this.”

 

“Same here.” The redhead joined.

 

“You know Jasmine, I really love your Maria outfit. Your dress is so pretty!”  Lilibeth complimented. 

 

“I love it too! And I’m glad I get to sing with a more… mature voice.”

 

“Your voice is incredible.”

 

“You’re the one talking,” Jasmine chuckled. “You have the prettiest voice around here Lilibeth.”

 

“Oh shut up.”

 

“No, she’s right,” Daveed agreed. 

 

“Even though you sound perfect during _Say no to this_ , I have to admit that your kiss with Lin is too long, way too long!” Anthony sighed as he shook his head. 

 

“Hey, it’s not my fault!” the Puerto Rican defended with his hands raised in surrender. “It’s Tommy’s.”

 

“I don’t think that’s fair that Lin gets to kiss the prettiest girls,” Daveed teased and the other man nodded. 

 

“I totally agree.”

 

“Come on guys, don’t be jealous,” Lilibeth teased as Jasmine grinned. 

 

“We’re not,” Anthony chuckled. “At the end of the day, you come back to us,” he beamed as he looked at Jasmine.

 

            Lin’s smile faltered but only Daveed witnessed it.

 

“You’re damn right,” Jazzy giggled and kissed him. “Hey wanna grab a drink?”

 

“Sure why no !”

 

“Yeah no… I’ll pass,” Lin replied. 

 

“Really, you don’t want to come ?” 

 

“I’m quite tired,” he admitted. “I’d rather go home.”

 

             He looked straight at the redhead.

 

“Vanessa is waiting for me.”

 

“Tell her I said hi.”

 

* * *

 

_My dearest, Vairon,  
_

 

_You have blessed one of my closest friends with your darling self. I am familiar with jealously but never before had I felt it eating me out that much. I spoke to Alex today and told him about our very first kiss. I shouldn’t have, but it’s Alex we’re talking about. Wise, wise Alex. Please, do not be mad at me, I didn’t mean to compromise our secret, I simply needed to tell someone._

_Days are getting longer with your absence and the fact that I can’t speak with you like we used to simply aggravates me. I would give everything I had if it meant that we could go back to what we were. Is it too much to ask? I do not know. I did not wish to betray your trust in any way, I really hope I didn’t. But Lilibeth, how can I apologize when you refuse to let me speak?_

_I do not know what to do anymore. I almost hate to come home at the end of the day, knowing that it’s Vanessa waiting for me and not you. I really am a jerk, am I not? I think back of the time when you were almost mine, if I may say so. I remember the first time I met you when I was just Lin and you were just Lilibeth. When to you, I didn’t have any girlfriend. When we could have been something if Vanessa hadn’t been there._

_I remember hearing you sing for the very first time, I remember the exact moment you opened your eyes and that I wondered about the Gods who blessed you with such perfect beauty, I remember having my soul leaving my body to kiss yours. Did you feel it? I wonder._

_I remember when you smiled and oh, you smiled. I remember how happy you looked when people left some money in your little hat. I remember you telling me that my name was weird, but that I looked cute. If you had known how much these words were dear to me. I wish to go back to these times, Lilibeth. I miss you terribly so. I-_

“Lin? Are you home?” Vanessa called as she closed the door.

 

          He quickly hid the letter and left his office to go to the living room. 

 

“Yeah.”

 

         She quickly kissed his cheek.

 

“You’re here early.”

 

“Mike helped me with a few things so I was able to leave my office earlier,” she explained as she made her way to the kitchen. “What do you want to eat, tonight ?”

 

“I don’t really know, I thought that maybe we could order some pizza? I didn’t feel like cooking tonight.”

 

“That’s fine for me,” she waved off as she texted on her phone. “Do we still have wine ?” 

 

“No, we don’t.”

 

                He had finished the bottle by himself as soon as he got back from work.

 

“I thought we had one bottle left;” she pouted as she looked into the fridge. “Do you think you could grab one downstairs?”

 

                He almost sighed. 

 

“Yeah, sure thing.” 

 

    He quickly put his shoes on before leaving their flat. Leaving _their flat._ He didn’t like it that much anymore. But he had to be satisfied with what he had, he had no other choice. He quickly put some music on his phone as he headed to the grocery shop. He couldn’t help but smile when he saw a father with his kid, who was begging to get some candies. He’d love to be him, to have a child of his own. That made him think. About him, about Lilibeth, about Vanessa, about their relationship. 

   

        When were they going to start their own little family ? He wanted children. He was more ready to have one, yet he perfectly knew that they were no such plans in Vanessa’s mind at the moment. He couldn’t help but feel this longing for a family as he watched the kid with his father around the store. He wondered about Lilibeth’s children. Would they get her eyes or her beautiful smile? He shook his head and quickly bought the wine before going back to the flat. 

 

“I ordered the usual,” Vanessa told him as he poured himself a glass of wine. “Is that alright?”

 

“Yeah, totally.”

 

              He took a sip of his drink.

 

“Lilibeth says hi.”

 

            That made her look up.

 

“That’s sweet. How is she?”

 

“Fine, fine, fine. She’s… She’s with Daveed.”

 

                 Her eyebrows rose. 

 

“As… Daveed Diggs ?”

 

                   He nodded.

 

“That’s nice! They must be so cute together.”

 

“They sure are,” he commented, absently. 

 

“Is everything alright Lin?”

 

“Yes sure, I’m just thinking about things…”

 

“Things ?”

 

“Yes you know, things.”

 

“Well, if you could develop a little bit on that, I could actually help you,” she offered with a kind smile. 

 

“You don’t want to talk about it,” he replied, trying to maintain a level tone

 

“How could you know?”

 

“Because you never want to.”

 

“Lin?” she frowned. “What’s wrong?”

 

“Do you know when is my birthday ?”

 

“Yes of course, on January 16th. Why ?”

 

“Do you know how old I’ll be ?”

 

“34, I don’t see where we’re going with that.”

 

“I’m close to 40,” he stated. “40. It's not old. Not really. But I’m not getting younger.”

 

           Realization dawned upon her face as he looked at her.

 

“And here we go…”

 

“Lin if it is about…”

 

“Of course it’s about children!” Lin spat.

 

“Why does it always have to be about this ?” Vanessa sighed angrily.

 

“Because I want to build a family, Vanessa! I want to be a father and I am more than ready for that.”

 

“You know there are other commitments that we can make before having children.”

 

“Yes, I know!”

 

“Then why didn’t you propose to me then?” she asked back and he froze. “You’ve had your ring for quite a while, didn’t you ?”

 

         His heart stopped.

 

“If you really wanted to commit maybe it was a good first step.”

 

“You… you saw the ring ?”

 

“Of course I did. I didn’t mean it, though,” she clarified. “But then I saw how dusty the box was and I have no idea for how long you’ve been keeping it.”

 

“I… I just…” 

 

_Quick, think of something Lin, quick._

 

“Because of this whole children thing I had no idea if you’d say yes.”

 

“Really?” she arched an eyebrow.

 

“What was I supposed to think? Every time I ask you about it, you tell me you’re not ready. I thought that maybe you wouldn’t be ready for this too…”

 

“Getting engaged is not the same thing as having a kid, Lin!”

 

“Yes but often, first you get engaged and then you have kids. That’s logical!”

 

“Well, I don’t want children now!” she screamed. 

 

“You’ve been saying that for more than two years now! When is it now going to change? Is it ever going to change?”

 

“I don’t know, Lin. It’s not just something you can pressure me into !”

 

“I’m not pressuring you into anything! I’m just suggesting-”

 

“Yes, you are! Every two months you have to bring it up !”

 

“Because I need to know if you changed your mind !”

 

“I’ll tell you when I changed my mind!”

 

                She took her bag and stormed out of the living.

 

“And right now I need to clear my mind!”

 

Then, she slammed the door on her way out. He kicked the table with his foot. 

 

“Fuck!”

 

* * *

 

    He couldn’t bear it anymore. The silence was killing him and he was terribly missing her. Writing letters wasn’t enough anymore. He needed to talk to her, he needed to feel her inside his arms. He hadn’t been talking to Vanessa for two days and he had no idea what to do next. He knew that Lilibeth gave the best advice (behind Alex, of course, but hadn’t spoken a word of this argument thing with his friend). Heaven knows, he could really use a friend. 

   

       But it was so hard to talk to her. Every time he tried, she simply waved him off, telling him that she was always busy or simply that she didn’t want to talk to him. He knew that she was still made because of what he had said in her lounge, he wanted to apologize. But how could he when she refused to hear him? And even better, she was almost always with Daveed.   
  
      He couldn’t have a little bit of privacy when he was around. It wasn’t the poor man’s fault, he was simply hanging out with his girlfriend. Who could blame him? But he took his chance after a rehearsal. As they were all leaving, he went into her lounge. She was back into her normal clothes and she was talking to Daveed. 

 

“Lilibeth, please I need to talk to you,” he asked.

 

“Not now Lin. We have to go.”

 

“Please,” he implored.

 

           He didn’t know if it was the way his voice broke or how miserable he looked, but she sighed and looked at her boyfriend. 

 

“You can go, I’ll join you later.”

 

             Daveed silently nodded and left them together.

 

“What is it ?”

 

“I… I came to apologize.”

 

“Apologize?”

 

“Yeah… Last week I’ve been a dick,” he scratched the back of his neck. “I… I said things I shouldn’t have said and…”

 

“Like that you loved me.”

 

“Oh hum… yeah…”

 

           She rolled her eyes, her arms crossed on her chest.

 

“I mean… what I said about you and Daveed… I shouldn’t have. I mean, if he makes you happy, then so be it. You were right, you have every right to be happy, even if it’s not with me.” 

 

             She stared at him for a little too long. 

 

“It’s just that… have we have… or had… It’s one of a kind,” he ruefully smiled. “But that’s okay. I want us to be friends. It killed me to be so distant with you. For real. I mean, there are so many things I have to tell you. Really. I can probably write a book about everything I need to tell you. Hell, I can fill a library with everything I need to tell you.”

 

             The corner of her lips threatened to twitch up.

 

        “Is that…” he slightly leaned in. “Is that a smile I spy, Miss Williams?” 

 

            Her lips broke into a grin.

 

“Now, that’s a pretty view.”

 

“You’re an idiot.”

 

“Yes, I am,” he accepted. “Am I forgiven ?” 

 

“I guess you are now, Mr. Hamilton.”

 

“Can I… Can I hug you ?” he slowly questioned and his voice broke.

 

          With the look in his eyes, she couldn’t deny him that.

 

“Yes you can, Lin.”

 

“I've missed you,” he hugged her tightly. 

 

“I've missed you too.”

 

            She took a long look at him.

 

“Did something happen?”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“You look like shit. No offence.”

 

“None taken,” he replied as he rubbed his eyes. “I… I got into a fight with Vanessa.”

 

“Oh shit.”

 

“Yeah, it’s getting more and more complicated to… talk to her.”

 

“Is it because of…?”

 

“No, not at all. You have nothing to do with it. She doesn’t know anything she just… We disagree on certain things, like… most couples I think ?”

 

           Lilibeth nodded.

 

“But… for more than two years we still have recurring fights about the same subject.”

 

“Which is ?”

 

“Children.”

 

           She swallowed hard. 

 

“You don’t want a child and she wants one?”

 

“Quite the opposite actually.”

 

“You want children? Like… now ?”

 

         His lips pressed into a thin line. 

 

“I’m… more than ready to become a father. And I’m not getting any younger. I want… to make the most of the time I can have with them. And she keeps telling me that she’s not ready.”

 

“Lin… You can’t pressure a woman into getting pregnant to satisfy your need of being a father,” she tried being as gentle as she could as she spoke.

 

“I’m not! I just…” he pinched the bridge of his nose. “I respect her decision but I also know that it’s not going to change.”

 

“What does it mean?”

 

“It means…” he sighed. “It means that I might have to leave her soon.”

 

“Are… Are you sure ?” She asked, worried about her friend. “I mean…  you’ve been sharing your lives together for almost five years. Will you manage ?”

 

“I… I don’t know, Lilibeth.”

 

         He looked so lost and heartbroken, it broke her heart. 

 

       She let him cry into her arms because she knew that’s what he needed. The beautiful man was a mess and he needed her. He needed her to comfort him because she understood him more than anyone else. Sure it was quite a shock to hear him say that he wanted to leave Vanessa because with everything that happened between them and yet the two of them still being together, she thought they would always last. 

 

       But she completely understood Lin. How could one try to build a future with someone who doesn’t share the same ambitions and dreams? She knew that he would be a great father. He’d be the perfect family man. Devoted to his wife and to his kids. And knowing that his situation did not allow him to have kids deeply hurt her too. As the sobs echoed into the room, Daveed silently walked away from the half-opened door.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a/n : Okay Lin you really need to chill. I love Daveed so much, he is so sweet. I've been reading a lot of Hamilton fanfics lately, who would have thought that the founding fathers would obssess me that much ? Ha ha.  
> Thanks to HeyItsValeria13 for being my beta reader.  
> Now I'm getting slightly curious about the people who read this. If you write, what's your favourite place to write ?  
> What did you love in this chapter ?  
> much love,  
> tiny.


	18. WINDOW TO THE SOUL

 

 

      He had noticed it.

 

_“Lin !”_

 

       Of course he had come to notice it.

 

_“What is it, Vairon ?”_

 

              It didn’t take him long.

 

_“Come on, stop being such a child. We have to get ready, dearest Alexander.”_

 

          Just a few stolen glances. Stage kisses. Hushed whispers.

 

_“Well, my dearest, Eliza. Your wish is my command.”_

 

      Chemistry cannot lie. Daveed Diggs knew that very well.

 

               And what Lilibeth Williams and Lin-Manuel Miranda had was undeniable. He knew it better than anyone else. At first he simply ignored it. He thought it was just his mind playing some tricks on him. But then came a time when he couldn’t just ignore it anymore. There was the small period when they had a dispute, so they were distant. But ever since Lin apologized, everything came back to normal. Meaning they were close once again.

               Lilibeth was always attentive to Daveed’s wishes, he couldn’t deny that. He knew that she really tried her best and that she wanted their relationship to work out. Yet… he felt it, every time they’d kiss or sleep together. Something was different. She fulfilled him, yes. But he had the impression that he didn’t do the same for her. He wondered if with him, she was satisfied. A bitter smile kissed his lips. He knew that with Lin… even if they weren’t together, she was satisfied.

               They weren’t loud with their relationship. They always made sure not to show too much PDA and to always remain strictly friendly. But Daveed knew better. He had been friends with Lin for quite some time and he just knew when Lin loved someone. Because yes, he was past _liking_ Lilibeth, that was for sure. Lin could fool everyone he wanted, but he couldn’t fool him. He had seen how he was looking at Lilibeth when she wasn’t paying attention.

               That made him angry with him. Because Lin had no right to have such feelings when he had his sweet and beautiful Vanessa waiting for him at home. He never considered his friend to be this kind of person. But yet when he heard about the troubles and arguments he had with Vanessa, he could understand. To him, Lin was loyal and loving. Yet, every gaze cast in Lilibeth’s direction was a love declaration in itself. It took him a while to actually notice it. Lin was a good actor.

             Yet, Lin had made a mistake. He’d let his guard down the moment he thought he was alone and that no one was around to see him look at _her._ But Daveed had been there. And he’d seen it. He’d seen the look on his friend’s face. He had tried to ignore it, thinking that it wasn’t what he thought it was. But it came haunting him at night and that’s when he realized so many things about them.

              One had to be blind not to see the amazing chemistry both of them had when they were on stage. They were brilliant and talented. The thing was that it didn’t stop on stage. It was all the time. Sometimes, it was also too painful to watch. Daveed was a good and attentive boyfriend. He always tried his best to satisfy her needs and her wishes. He almost thought he had.

               Until the day he saw the two of them, sitting on stage when everyone had left. Their feet were dangling as they were looking at the empty seats. It was incredibly quiet. No one would have known that not even thirty minutes prior, they had been rehearsing. They were still in their costume though.

 

_“You know, your dresses are beautiful,” Lin remarked as she was toying with it. “You must feel like a Queen, right ?”_

 

_“You have no idea," she chuckled. "I spent most of my lunch time just twirling around. I mean, what’s the point of having these dresses if not to dramatically run everywhere you go ?”_

 

_He couldn’t help but smile._

 

_“A queen, though ? Not a princess ?”_

 

_“Nah. You’re a Queen to me, Vairon,” he honestly replied, looking at her for a little too long. “Always.”_

 

_She gently squeezed his hand before getting up._

 

_“Come on, Mr. Hamilton. Time to go."_

 

_The man smiled in a way Daveed had never seen him do before._

 

_“As you wish, Mrs. Hamilton.”_

 

_She had never smiled at him like that._

 

               He wasn’t angry with Lilibeth, because she tried. She tried to suffocate her love for Lin, to bottle it up deep inside her, trying to forget it so she could love Daveed only. She really tried. But some things weren’t just meant to be. Some things weren’t meant to be forced. Especially a relationship. He didn’t want to lose her, because before being his girlfriend, she was his friend. His best friend. And he didn’t want that to change.

               Yet he knew that something had to be done. They couldn’t keep it going this way. As Daveed was watching them together, watching how their eyes would light up every time they looked at each other, he couldn’t deny it any longer. He knew that Lilibeth cared about him and that she loved him. But not in the same way _he_ loved _her_. And it seemed like it was a choice she wasn’t going to make. But he would.

                As Lin was jumping on stage, being silly once again, Lilibeth couldn’t help but smile. He could be such a child sometimes. That’s what she liked about him. He had such a vibrant personality which stood out in every gesture he made to express himself or to sing.

 

“You love him, don’t you ?”

 

      Lilibeth turned her head to see Daveed seated next to her. He had been so quiet, observing her, that she didn’t realize he was there. She opened her mouth to protest but when she saw the look in his eyes and the small smile adorning his lips, she simply resigned. Her eyes fell on Lin again.

 

“Yes.”

“Does it hurt ?”

“Every day.”

“Does he know ?”

“I hope.”

“Why don’t you tell him ?”

“Vanessa.”

“How long is it going to last ?”

“As long as it needs," she sighed. “Are you mad at me ?”

“For being in love with someone else ?” he scoffed. “Don’t be ridiculous.”

“I’m a shitty girlfriend.”

“I’ve seen better,” he teased, making her smile.

“How did you know ?”

“It’s just… the way you look at him, I suppose. And the way he looks at you. There is no mistaking in your eyes,” she looked down. “Why is he still with Vanessa if it’s you that he loves ?” he asked, genuinely confused.

“I… I don’t know,” she honestly replied. “I guess… when you’ve been in a relationship with someone for several years you are expected to make some kind of commitment, not leave.”

“But what if he doesn’t want to make a commitment ?”

“It’s his choice, Daveed. His only.”

                  Tears started rolling down her cheeks.

“Hey it’s okay…”

“Why don’t you hate me ?”

“Oh Lilibeth,” he took her into his arms and kissed her forehead. “I could never hate you. You’re my best friend, alright ?”

              She sniffled and nodded.

“And I don’t want this to change. Ever.”

“Me too,” he could never hold any resentment toward her. Never.

 

* * *

 

               When Jasmine asked her why she wasn’t with Daveed anymore, she simply told her that they preferred to stay just friends, they liked it better that way. It wasn’t a lie but it wasn’t the entire truth either. The first person who actually knew about the breakup was Alex. She told him absolutely everything, about Daveed’s words, about her feelings toward Lin… The man was very comprehensive and comforted her in a way that only himself could.

               He told her that it was better that way, that she didn’t have to blame herself for everything, because who really chooses the person they love ? It’s not a choice you make, it’s a thing thrust upon yourself. And you have no say in it. She told him about her conversation with Lin. About how things weren’t going well with Vanessa. She admitted that part of her was relieved, because it meant that he could he hers. But another part felt terrible, because she couldn’t imagine the pain of breaking up with someone you spent so many years with.

               Several days had passed and she was glad that things weren’t awkward with Daveed. He was still as sweet as usual, always teasing her and messing with her. She was glad that they still were close friends, she didn’t want to lose him. And he was so supportive of her feelings for Lin, like… how was it even possible ? He told her that everything would turn out okay and that if Lin didn’t leave his girlfriend for her, then he was ‘a stupid bastard who didn’t know what he was losing’. That made her laugh. Lilibeth smiled when she saw her little brother’s face appear on her screen.

 

“Hey.”

“ _Hey, how are you ?_ ”

              Her smile grew even wider.

“Wow, speaking English now ? I’m impressed.”

“ _What ? I have to practice too, you know._ ”

“I’m fine, how are you ?" she chuckled. "I’m surprised you managed to find time to FaceTime me.”

“ _I’m fine. And I should be the one telling you that ! You’re always busy with your musical._ ”

“You know me, always working hard.”

“ _Don’t forget me when you’re famous, right ?_ ”

“I could never forget you. Nor mum or Molly. Speaking of her, how is she ?”

“ _She’s fine. She’s working really hard because she has some exams coming up,_ ” he beamed and her heart melted.

“And you, is everything alright ?”

“ _Yeah. I’m a little bit nervous because of the competition coming. Mum told me that she already asked you ?_ ”

“Yeah. And I’d be delighted to be your accompanist, Atlas.”

“ _Thank you. It means… a lot to me,_ ” he sincerely said.

           She knew how important music was in his life. Ever since they were kids, they'd always played together.

“ _I can’t wait to see you again._ ”

“Me too,” she honestly replied. “I miss seeing your face. And hearing you play.”

“ _I can play a little something for you if you want. I recorded a lot of demos._ ”

“Yes please. And could you send them to me ?”

“ _I’ll do that tonight,_ ” he promised. “ _So wait…_ ”

                 He put his phone on his music stand and took his violin.

“ _Okay, you ready ? It’s something I composed,_ ” he explained as he started playing.

 

      Lilibeth couldn’t help but smile. Her brother was her favourite musician. He was a little prodigy too. It wasn’t surprising, they tended to be good with music in their family. Atlas was incredibly talented and he played violin better than anyone she had heard before. She closed her eyes as she listened to the beautiful yet melancholic melody. She couldn’t help but feel a sense of longing and yearning when she listened to the song. Atlas had the same way as her to put his raw emotions into partitions and make the toughest cookie cry.

 

“That’s beautiful, Atlas.”

“ _I wrote it for you. Because I miss you,_ ” he grinned, chest swelling with pride

“I miss you too. I can’t wait for you to come here, you know ? Soon, I’ll get a new flat and you’ll be able to come here during your holidays.”

“ _I just can’t wait,_ ” he beamed.

“By the way, what do you want to play for your competition ?”

“Easy, _Saint-Saëns – Introduction and Rondo Capriccioso._ ”

“I love this one,” she approved, nodding. “I’ll start working on it.”

“ _Thank you, Lilibeth_.”

“Anything for you.”

       And she meant it.

“ _What about Lin ?_ ”

             Atlas knew everything that happened between her and the Puerto Rican. Everything.

“He’s not doing so well at the moment. He keeps arguing with his girlfriend.”

“ _Cool, maybe he’ll leave her and be with you instead._ ”

“Shut your mouth !”

              He only chuckled. She knew he meant no harm, he just wanted to see his big sister happy. But that didn't mean that he could say things like that. She knew that Lin cared about Vanessa, despite everything. She heard someone knock.

“Hey, I gotta go, but I’ll talk to you later, alright ?”

“ _Yup. I’ll send you the demos don’t worry. Love you._ ”

“Love you too !” she said as she hung up and turned around. “Yes ?”

“Hey Lilibeth !”

                   She smiled when she saw Lin coming in.

“Damn you look happy.”

“I just face timed my little brother.”

“Atlas, right ?”

“Yeah," she nodded. "He played a little bit of violin for me, so yeah, I’m pretty over the moon right now.”

“I’d like to hear him play.”

“He’s supposed to send me a few demos of things he composed. I’ll make you listen.”

“That’s cool.”

“You know, you really look good in these clothes,” she chuckled to her friend as she eyed him up.

                She adored 18th century costumes.

“Yeah, I know, green suits me so well,” he dramatically sighed.

“What’s up ?”

“Is everything alright ?” he asked, catching her off guard.

“Sure,” she nodded. “Why ?”

“Oh, it’s just that I saw you with Daveed and you seemed… different ?”

               She gently smiled. Of course he would come to notice it.

“Yeah, we’re not together anymore.”

“W-what ? Really ?” he raised his eyebrows in surprise.

              So many questions appeared in his mind.

“Why ?”

           She shrugged.

“I guess… we are better as friends than as something more.”

                He thought his heart was going to explode. He immediately kneeled in front of her, a frantic look in his eyes.

“Are you alright ?”

                 She blinked a couple of times and then slowly smiled.

_Typical caring Lin._

“Yes,” she took his hands and slightly squeezed them. “I’m fine.”

“Do you want to do something ?”

“When ?”

“Now.”

“Now ?”

“Now !” he nodded vigorously. “The rehearsals are over for today. We could go grab a drink, clear your mind ? What do you say ?”

 

       She observed him for a couple of seconds. He looked like he really wanted to help her to get better. She could tell him that honestly, it wasn’t a big deal, because she didn’t get hurt. Not by Daveed anyway. She could tell him that he didn’t need to make her feel better. She could tell him that she was okay to spend the rest of her night alone in her small flat. She could.

 

“Yeah, I’m totally on it.”

 

      But she wanted to taste the little happiness she could sometimes reach with him. Even if it didn’t last.

 

* * *

 

“OH COME ON !” 

 

               Turned out they were both quite tired because of the rehearsals and they didn’t really want to go outside, so Lilibeth invited Lin to come to her flat so they could eat and play some video games. They ordered pizzas and Lin had bought beers on their way home so they could spend a good evening. He knew that Vanessa wasn’t coming home tonight so he didn't need to worry about the clock. They were both comfortably seated on her small couch, a controller in their hands as they were fixing the TV screen.

 

“You cheated !” he whined and she smirked.

“I didn’t cheat. You’re just bad, that’s all.”

“I am not ! I want a revenge !”

“Again ? Don’t you want to play another game ?”

      They’d been playing to Mario Kart for half an hour.

“Yes again !” he repeated, scrunching his nose at her, making her laugh. “I want to win against you.”

“You won’t,” she warned.

“Fucking watch me.”

        But of course, he didn’t. Lilibeth explained him that she spent an awful lot of time when she was a kid playing with this game with the twins.

“That’s not fair. You can’t be good at everything,” he pouted like a child.

“What ?” she chuckled. “It’s not like I’m good at everything. I can't draw to save my life.”

“Me neither,” he sighed. “But you’re better than me at singing and dancing and playing piano !”

               She shook her head.

“Lin, you’re incredibly talented too. And you know it,” she grabbed a slice of pizza.

“Yeah you’re totally right,” he finger-gunned at her.

               She rolled her eyes.

“You’re such a child.”

“But you love me," he retorted.

“Yeah sure.”

“So, you said that Atlas played violin right ? And your sister, Molly ? What does she do ?”

“She’s studying to become a midwife, actually.”

“Wow, that’s something clever. Not music related at all.”

“She likes music but she never really played,” she shrugged. “She's more interested in the human body than anything else. But she’s doing great so I’m not worried.”

“And what does Atlas want to do later ?”

“Professor, I’m sure. But he’s enjoying being a musician at the moment. He’s really good. Actually, in January, before we start performing _Hamilton_ , he has this competition. I’m going to play with him as his accompanist.”

“Can I be here ?”

“Lin… It’s in France.”

“So ?” he replied, unfazed.

“You want to come to France just to see me play with my brother ?”

“Absolutely.”

              She perfectly remembered when he told her how he wanted to go to France with her, back in the hotel room.

_"I could take you to Paris."_

_"You are Paris."_

“Yeah but I’m going there for Christmas and I’m not sure your family will appreciate having you an ocean away for the holiday,” she chuckled.

“I don’t care if it means I get to be with you,” he shrugged.

“Lin…”

“I know, I know. I’m sorry,” he chuckled. “Or… am I ?”

               She playfully slapped his shoulder.

“Stop messing around,” she told him and looked at the clock on her wall. “It’s getting quite late. Don’t you have to come back home ?”

                 He took a sip of his beer and shook his head.

“No, not tonight.”

“You can stay here if you want for the night. I only have the couch to offer you, though.”

“You mean that I can’t sleep in the bed with you ?”

              She tried to ignore the warm feeling that spread into her lower abdomen.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” she scoffed. “You wish.”

“I do.”

                 She blinked.

“You really shouldn’t go around saying these kind of things…” she murmured with a rueful smile.

“I know,” he acknowledged. “But you and me both know that I just can’t shut up about it.”

“You definitely should.”

“Because of Vanessa, right ?” he sighed.

                   She couldn’t help but notice that something was different. Did the situation get worse between them ?

“It’s alright Lin. She’s your girl. I’m not.”

“Do you want to be ?”

_Yes._

“You can’t ask me this question,” she frowned.

      Didn’t they already have this conversation before ? 

“I want to break up with her,” he stated and she blinked. “But I can’t right now because she’s working on a huge case and she needs to focus on her work.”

                Lilibeth took his hands in hers and gently squeezed it.

“Lin… You’re going to throw away five years of relationship. And for what ?”

“I told you before. She doesn’t want children and I can’t just stay with someone I know I won’t have a family with,” he whispered, frowning. “And also… for you.”

              She felt relieved to know that she wasn’t the main cause of his future break up with Vanessa.

“I don’t want to destroy your happiness, Lin.”

“Lilibeth, you are the happiness I’ve always tried to reach,” he confessed, leaning closer. “What I told you in the lounge the other time… That was true. These words are yours and yours only."

                  She closed her eyes as she felt the ghost of his lips on the corner of her mouth.

“Just… wait for me, okay ?” he pleaded. “I know how you told me that you didn’t want to wait but I’m begging you. Please. Wait for me. I’m coming around.”

              She opened her eyes and smiled.

      The way his eyes were burning with hope gave her a sense of security in her life she had never felt before.

“Okay,” she slowly nodded and his smile grew even wider.

“Okay," he gently kissed her hands. “Can I sleep with you tonight ? No funny business,” he promised. “I just want to hold you close.”

“Alright.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Come say hi to my tumblr.


	19. ALL I WANT IS THE TASTE THAT YOUR LIPS ALLOW

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lilibeth performs her song in front of Lin. He is enamoured.

 

“Did something happen between you and Lin ?” Daveed asked as he messed with Lilibeth’s hair in his lounge.

              Javier had not arrived yet.

“How did you know ?”

“I know you and I know him,” he simply shrugged. “So ?”

“He… He told me that he was going to break up with Vanessa.”

“Fucking finally,” she gently slapped his shoulder. “What ? I don’t have anything against her but someone has to be blind not to see that Lin is not really… satisfied with his relationship,” he shrugged. “I’d rather have him with you than with her.”

“I thought you liked her.”

“Just because I like her doesn’t mean that he’s the perfect person for Lin," he replied. “I admit it, I thought that she was, at some point. But now ? We all know who’s perfect for Lin.”

       He gave her a pointed look and she couldn’t help but smile. She was glad to be able to talk to him about her relationship with Lin, considering their history.

“That’s really sweet for you to say that," she smiled.

“Guys have you seen Anthony ?” Jasmine asked, poking her head in the room.

“How do you manage to loose your boyfriend in a theatre, Jazz ?”

“I didn’t lose him,” she retorted.

              Daveed and Lilibeth arched an eyebrow.

“Okay, I lost him. But it’s not my fault !”

“He must be into the break room, eating something. You know how he is.”

“Yeah, you’re right, I’m going to check, thanks !” she waved as she left.

“You know… I wrote this song, months ago. I’m going to perform it tomorrow night, at the Chélie.”

“Is it why you are so tense ?”

“You know me so well,” she chuckled. “But yes. I mean… I wrote this special song for him. I’ve laid all of my heart in this song.”

“Are you ready to perform it ?” he wondered.

“I… I think so. I’ve been meaning to do it for a while but I couldn’t because of…”

_Vanessa._

“But now…”

“Everything has changed.”

“Everything has changed.”

“Could you sing it to me ?” he softly asked.

“Sure.”

 

* * *

 

               Lilibeth couldn’t stop messing around. She recorded many vines, recording her friends and the ensemble as they were performing on stage and sending the videos to the group chat. She sent a lot of snaps to the twins. By now, they basically knew everyone even though they had never stepped into Richard Roger. When they weren’t rehearsing, they spent most of their time drawing in the break room or just hanging out with each other. She couldn’t help but grow excited as days passed, because it meant that _Hamilton_ was coming closer and that she was soon going to see her family again.  
               But most importantly, she was going to see her beloved Atlas again. Even though she was enjoying herself, she didn’t forget to work on _Saint-Saëns – Introduction and Rondo Capriccioso_. By now she had perfectly memorized it and could play it with her eyes closed. She could almost hear Atlas playing with her. She couldn’t wait to see him again.  Once she was done with the piece, she heard someone clap and cheer for her. She turned her head to see Lin and Alex.

 

“Hey, I didn’t see you there,” she smiled.

“Maybe because you had your eyes closed,” Lin arched an eyebrow. “How can you play something like that with your eyes closed ?”

“I know it by heart.”

“I’m so glad I got the chance to see you play,” Alex beamed and she couldn’t help but chuckle.

“It’s nothing, really,” she responded but he shook his head.

“Lilibeth, don’t try to be modest with me. We’re talking about Lilibeth Williams here. I can brag about having seen you play piano.”

                  They laughed.

“It’s the song you are going to perform with Atlas for his competition, isn't it ?” the Puerto Rican asked.

“Yes. I need it to be perfect.”

“You’re playing as an accompanist ?” Alex questioned.

“Yes, with my little brother, Atlas. He’s a violinist,” she explained.

“Oh yeah, I heard about him. Doesn’t he have a twin sister ?”

“Molly,” Lin replied. “You played beautifully.”

“You think so ? I’m not ready yet.”

“You’re not ?” he sounded surprised. “But… it sounded perfect.”

“It was far from being perfect, Lin.”

“Lilibeth’s demands toward her playing are different than ours,” Alex explained and she nodded in agreement.

“I need to work harder if I want Atlas to win.”

“He’s going to win,” Lin assured.

“We weren’t taught anything less,” she chuckled. “I don’t want to disappoint him.”

“You won’t.”

“Could you play it once again, please ?” Alex asked her.

“Of course.”

 

               Vanessa did not make his life easy. Every time he tried to talk to her, he never managed to go to the point. Then, she had to leave once again for her work. She'd be back in a week or so and he didn’t know what to do. He told Lilibeth, explaining that they just needed to wait a little bit more. His patience was wearing thin and all the waiting was slowly killing him, but he knew that in a week from then, he’d be able to be Lilibeth’s. And there was nothing else he’d rather be.

               It made his life easier to know that Lilibeth also wanted to be in a relationship with him. He didn’t really have to hide anything to her anymore. Well of course, they couldn’t just go around and kiss each other in public while he still was with Vanessa. They did hug a lot, though. Except for Daveed and Alex, no one knew of their plans. But Lin had made the decision to call his parents, to tell them everything.

               When he called his mother, he could tell that she was shocked by the news he brought her. The last time he had called to talk about his relationship with Vanessa, it was to tell his mother that he was going to propose. He explained her how complicated his relationship with Vanessa had become. That he still hadn’t proposed and that he wasn’t planning to. He told her about Lilibeth and his love for her. It wasn’t the first time he'd talked about Lilibeth to his mother, but it was the first time he was honest with his feelings for her.

               He explained them how he wouldn’t stop arguing with Vanessa, because she didn’t want children. And Lin’s parents perfectly knew how building a family was important for Lin. They told him that no matter what was next, they’d be there for him. They hoped that he really did think this through. He did. He really did. His mother told him that as long as he was happy, she’d be fine.

 

“Lin ?”

“Yes, Lilibeth ?”

“Tomorrow night I’m going to perform at the Chélie. I’d like you to come.”

                 He sat up to meet her eyes.

“I’d love to.”

 

* * *

 

               The French woman tweeted that she’d be singing at the Chélie on this Friday night. And that if anyone was interested, she’d be more than happy to meet them. In the hope of seeing Lilibeth performing, the place was packed. There were twice as more people as usual. When she entered some people asked for pictures and autographs. It felt different, but good. People were sweet, telling her that they couldn’t wait to hear her sing. Lilibeth was beyond thrilled. It had been quite a long time since she had last seen Tim. So when her eyes landed on him, she jumped into his arms. The first thing he told her was that Penelope was expecting.

               She screamed into his ears, rending the poor man almost deaf, before asking to know whether it was a boy or a girl. It was no real surprise when he told her that they'd made a bet regarding the gender of the baby. Tim, having lost the last bet, promised himself that he wouldn’t have to see his wife buy another pair of shoes for a least a year. He was sure the child was going to be a girl. She didn’t dare asking him what Penelope would benefit from the bet if she won.

             She had asked Alex, wise, wise Alex to come too. He was the one who had helped her write the song and he was the best person to accompany her while she sang. She wasn’t anxious because she knew that her song was good. She simply hoped that Lin was going to love it. She had written it for him, after all.

 

“Are you ready ?”

            She nervously smiled at her curly haired friend.

“Yeah. I mean, it’s just my first song going public, it’s no big deal, is it ?”

                 Her smile slowly faded.

“Is it, Alex ?”

                    He merely chuckled.

“No, it’s not. It’s going to be okay. We rehearsed it a lot of times. You know it by heart, I know it by heart, everything is going to be perfect.”

“And for…?”

_Lin._

“Well, we did say that you both had to talk about it, right ?”

                   She nodded.

“Then you will have done your share. It’ll be his turn.”

“He already did, though.”

“Fair enough.”

“Hey !” Lin smiled as he joined them.

            Lilibeth beamed at him.

“Lilibeth you look gorgeous tonight.”

“Thank you ! Oh, by the way, Tim told me that his wife was expecting !”

“Really ?” he raised his eyebrows. “That’s nice ! A boy or a girl ?”

“They refuse to know now, they actually made a bet about it.”

“Didn’t Tim loose the last bet ?” Lin recalled and that made her laugh.

“Yes, this is exactly why he wanted another one.”

“Quite silly,” he chuckled and Lilibeth couldn’t help but stare at him.

                    She was snapped out of it by Alex clearing his throat.

“How about we play this song, Lilibeth ?” he asked her and she nodded.

                  Lin frowned, confused.

“Wait, you’re going on stage together ?”

“Yup. You remember that song I told you about, several months ago ?”

“Yes ?”

“Well, be prepared, you’re going to hear it for the first time, any minute now.”

                His eyebrows shot up to his hairline, but the smile was still there.

“Are you serious ?”

“Yes !”

“I am so excited. Good luck !”

                She thanked him before heading to the stage.

“Okay guys, you remember me ?” the crowd cheered and she chuckled. “Yeah, I’m done being a barista, but I can’t stay away from a stage for too long.”

               They laughed.

“So this song is very special to me. It’s my very first song I ever recorded. It’s not out yet.”

            The crowed screamed in delight.

“So yeah, I hope you enjoy it. It’s called _Never enough._ ”

     

       She took a deep breath.

 

**_I'm tryin' to hold my breath_ **

**_Let it stay this way_ **

**_Can't let this moment end_ **

**_You set off a dream in me_ **

**_Gettin' louder now_ **

**_Can you hear it echoing?_ **

**_Take my hand_ **

**_Will you share this with me?_ **

**_'Cause darling without you_ **

****

       As soon as she opened her mouth, the pub was silent. Alex remembered when she'd come to him a couple of months ago, asking him to help her with a song she was working on. She had been quite nervous about laying out her feelings to him. But he had always been there to listen to her. Not once he had let her down. For that, she would forever be grateful. The way her voice echoed through the room only gave him even more goose bumps, even though he had helped writing the song.

 

**_All the shine of a thousand spotlights_ **

**_All the stars we steal from the night sky_ **

**_Will never be enough_ **

**_Never be enough_ **

**_Towers of gold are still too little_ **

**_These hands could hold the world but it'll_ **

**_Never be enough_ **

**_Never be enough_ **

 

**_For me_ **

**_Never, never_ **

**_Never, never_ **

**_Never, for me_ **

**_For me_ **

**_Never enough_ **

**_Never enough_ **

**_Never enough_ **

**_For me_ **

**_For me_ **

**_For me_ **

 

               It was as if Lin had lost the ability to breathe. His heart was beating fast and hard and it almost hurt him. His eyes were glued to the red head on the stage. It was like… she was home. As if… she was meant to be there. His mouth slightly agape, he slowly made his way toward the stage, but he remained standing, even though his legs felt like jelly. He was hanging to every word that were coming from her mouth.

               Was there anything she couldn’t do ? He knew that she wrote songs, she had told him about it. But he had no idea that she was THAT good. Again, it was Lilibeth Williams we were talking about. Where had she been hiding all of his life ? What if he had never met her ? He shook his head. No, it wasn’t the time to dwell on such thoughts.

 

**_All the shine of a thousand spotlights_ **

**_All the stars we steal from the night sky_ **

**_Will never be enough_ **

**_Never be enough_ **

**_Towers of gold are still too little_ **

**_These hands could hold the world but it'll_ **

**_Never be enough_ **

**_Never be enough_ **

 

               That was her present to him. Their song. A song she wrote for him. A beautiful tragedy. _I want you to be mine._ The song said. _I want you to be mine._ Oh he wanted to be hers. If only things had been different... He would have tasted this happiness the minute he had laid his eyes on her. Alex looked at his friend and slightly smiled. Who could he fool with this look on his face ? By now, he knew very well of the affections Lin had toward Lilibeth. And in that moment, when he saw how his friends had a look of pure adoration on his face as he was staring at the red head, he couldn’t help but grow sad. What they had was something beyond words. And the fact that they couldn’t share it like they wanted was heart-wrenching. But he knew that it would change very soon.

 

**_For me_ **

**_Never, never_ **

**_Never, never_ **

**_Never, for me_ **

**_For me_ **

**_Never enough_ **

**_Never, never_ **

**_Never enough_ **

**_Never, never_ **

**_Never enough_ **

**_For me_ **

**_For me_ **

**_For me_ **

****

She looked straight at him, her heart beating fast, her hands trembling. It probably was one of the best performances she had ever given. And it was all for him. The crowd was still here, but it was all for him. Her Lin. Her sweet, lovely and caring Lin. It was for them and for their future that had yet to come. It was so close she could taste it.

 

**_For me_ **

 

               Lin gasped, finally reaching for air and he blinked a couple of time. His beautiful Lilibeth, so talented and perfect in every way. The crowd erupted in cheers and applause and she bowed before leaving the stage with Alex. The latter decided to give them some privacy and went to order something to drink. He knew better than to disturb the two lovebirds. 

      Lilibeth nervously smiled at him and he slowly made his way toward her. She had clearly laid her feelings for him, she wore her heart on her sleeve. He took her hands in his and slowly brought them to his lips. Even if she was used to him doing that, it would always feel as if it was the very first time.

 

“That was beyond-words, Lilibeth.”

            She chuckled.

“It didn’t look like it, but I was totally freaked out,” she admitted, making him laugh too.

“You did great. You looked perfect. I didn’t know you could write songs like this.”

“I told you, Alex helped me.”

“That he did.”

               She leaned in so that only him could hear her.

“This is your song, Lin. Yours only," she whispered.

 

               He blinked a couple of times, registering her words. His eyes grew wide before turning back to normal, then he grabbed her by her wrist and gently led her outside. She followed him happily but her smiled faltered when she saw the look on his face. She knew _that_ look. It was the same one he had when they were in the hotel room. He looked at her with such adoration, there couldn’t be any mistaking in the love in his eyes.

               Lin dawdled in taking her in. As if he was looking at her for the very first time. His reaction to seeing her was always the same as he had when he had first met her, anyway. He plucked a wild lock of hair behind her ear and took this opportunity to caress her rosy cheek. He always loved how she leaned into his touch. She craved for it. He observed her for what seemed like a long time before he spoke.

 

“I know we shouldn’t do that, but I can’t pretend anymore…”

“Lin, what are you talking about ?” she asked but there was fear in her voice and her eyes were weary.

                 He stared at her for a couple of seconds.

“I think you know.”

“ _No_ , Lin.”

“Lilibeth, please," he breathed resting his forehead against hers. “I need this. And you need this.”

             He tilted her chin up so that she would meet his eyes.

“But we promised, we made rules…” she murmured, her resolve crumbling as each second passed.

“Rules are made to be broken,” he gently retorted, reminding her of all the times she had said that very same sentence.

                  That could have made her smile. It almost made her smile.

“I need you to understand, to show you, how much you mean to me, how deep my affections run, how much I love you,” he spoke without taking a breath.

 _I love you._ She painfully closed her eyes. _I love you._

“But we managed to get this far…”

“And it’s killing us, Lilibeth. Can’t you see it ?” he took her hand and placed it on his heart. “You feel how it’s racing ? It’s only for you. You got me helpless.”

“Lin we can’t do that. I don’t want to be this kind of person.”

“Then don’t be. I’ll take the blame,” he pleaded, cupping her face in his hands.

              How could someone say no to those eyes ?

“L-Lin I…”

 

        Did she really want to say no to those eyes ?

 

“ _Please_.”

_Say no to this._

 

“ **Please**.”

 

_Say no to this._

 

“Alright.”

 

* * *

 

      Lingering kisses, crimson ears and clothes scattered around her bed. The thick sent of sex quickly filled with fragrance the small room. How they managed to keep their hands out of their pants while they were on their way here was already a miracle in itself. But as soon as the front door was shut, Lilibeth locked her legs around Lin’s waist as he effortlessly carried her around the flat. Sure, they did bump into a few things, causing them to laugh, but not once had they stopped kissing.

      She knew it was wrong but god, why did it feel so right?  His hands were in her hair, pulling it every time she would kiss him on the right spots. She had always thought that Lin would be a gentle lover, deep down she knew he was. But there was a need in his gestures, a hunger in every kiss he placed on her skin. She had never experienced this before. She had sex with several men, yet none of them had desired her like Lin did.

       When she was laying on the cold mattress, he stripped her naked, and set her as in the day that she was born. He worshipped her body like no one ever did before. She had never been self-conscious about her body, she worked hard to have this one, but with the way he was looking at her, she was sure that her self-confidence would have increased from one hundred percent. 

       She was beyond pleased with his body. She held him close to her, fearing that he would just disappear at any moment. With each thrust she saw the stars and she couldn’t help but wonder if it felt like being with Vanessa for him. But she quickly pushed this thought away because that night, that night… he was hers. And hers only.

       That night, everything turned upside down. All the things they shared. The song. The story of a woman who fell in love with a man, the very same man who became her dream. About all the missing opportunities and the happiness they almost reached. That night, had touched it, her happiness. She griped it tightly so it would never go away.

      Everywhere he touched, her skin was on fire. He set her aflame. Yet when he held her in his arms, he was delicate and loving. She knew that he had ruined any other sexual experience she could have with another man. No one could compete with him. She wanted to cry because she knew he loved her in a way that he had never loved before. He didn’t need to tell her, even though he did.

     He whispered so many times that he loved her that she didn’t remember what it was like to hear him utter different words. But she was not going to complain. She was completely fine with that. She had never felt so loved before. And for the first time in a while, she felt satisfied. And so did he.

       While they laid in bed, relishing in the afterglow sex, Lin talked about everything that was on his mind. He spoke of how much he loved her, how he adored her messy hair and her mismatching eyes. How he loved her care-freeness and her bold attitude. He vowed to bring down heaven and to rise hell for her. All these promises made her heart swell with pride and joy.

      When it was her turn to speak, she told him about the song. She told him how months ago she asked help to Alex. Alex, wise, wise Alex who immediately understood who she was talking about in her song. She told him that he was a poem with a heartbeat. That he was everything she had ever wished for. In this long conversation, they both ignored the fact that when the day would start, it wouldn’t be the same. They made love three times and refused to sleep. Their heaven was numbered, they wanted to enjoy it while they still could.

      And when the morning sun kissed her pale glowing skin, Lin realized that he could never be able to go back to Vanessa. He realized as he was gently caressing her small denuded body, that he had never felt happier. With his red haired angel sleeping beside him, he was over the moon. He knew that there could not be any more perfect view than this one when he woke up.

      What he felt for her, deeply felt for her, it couldn’t be put into words. He couldn’t even put it in a song. It wouldn’t be enough. It would never be enough. He wondered about how he had managed to live without her before. He was certain he couldn’t anymore. Not after everything that happened between them. Her perfume drove him crazy, bit by bit it became his oxygen and then he realized he needed her to breathe.

       He couldn’t help but take a picture of her as she laid in all her glory on his bed. The sun was kissing her auburn hair, setting it aflame and he had never thought that someone could look as holy as her while being asleep. He never wanted this moment to end. He wanted to lock her bedroom door and stay there for the rest of his days. He’d made his decision then.

               He couldn’t cope anymore. He couldn’t pretend. Not after everything that happened. He couldn’t go back to work and treat Lilibeth as a friend when she was so much more. He was going to break up with Vanessa. As soon as she came back from her business trip, he would have “the talk” with her, tell her everything.

      Hopefully, things would go fine.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta reader : HeyItsValeria13 
> 
> Your kudos and comments give me life.


	20. ONE AND ONLY

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lin and Vanessa have the talk. A rap happens and a letter is written.

 

              Vanessa had a long day but fortunately for her, Mike had helped her get through her case and bought her two coffees so she could survive. She really loved her job, she worked very hard to be where she was right now. Surely, she felt guilty for getting closer to Mike and for neglecting Lin but she couldn’t stop. She knew she shouldn’t be feeling what she was feeling toward her friend, that it was wrong… Yet, she couldn’t help the blood that rushed to her cheeks every time he complimented her or smiled.

               She was no fool too. She knew how Lin behaved with Lilibeth. She had only met the girl a couple of times, and she was lovely. But she knew that Lin cared a lot about her, perhaps a little too much. She wasn’t blind. She could see that they both liked each other. But Vanessa thought it was just a fling, that it wouldn’t last. She had never been so wrong.

               With the recurring arguments they had, she knew that something had changed. She understood Lin’s wish to have children, but she didn’t want them. She preferred spend day at her work instead of taking care of children. She was a rising lawyer; she couldn’t just get pregnant now. When she voiced her insecurities to Mike, he told her that it was okay (he didn’t really care about having kids anyway.) that she didn’t need to worry about that.

               He had kissed her after that and all of her worries had disappeared. She knew that it was wrong, because she was with Lin but god… how did it feel so right then ? That’s when she realized that she needed to have ‘the talk’ with Lin. They couldn’t go on like this. Not when they weren’t both honest to each other with their feelings. So when she saw on twitter that Lilibeth was performing at the Chélie in the evening, she knew that Lin was going to be there.

                 It was the very first time she had decided to come to this bar. She knew that Lin preferred to be alone, he told her that it was like his secret garden. She had accepted that. She knew that he needed his special place. But she was back from her business trip earlier than she was supposed to and she needed to see him. She immediately was entranced by the voice she heard when she came in. She looked on the stage and she saw one of the most beautiful women she had ever laid his eyes on. Even after all this time of seeing Lilibeth, she couldn’t help but be amazed by her beauty. 

                When she managed to detach her eyes from her, she noticed how everyone was bewildered by her and by her song. Then her gaze fell on Lin. That’s when she knew.  Never before had she seen that look on her Lin’s face. Well, on Lin’s face. He wasn’t hers anymore, was he ? Lin’s eyes were the most expressive thing Vanessa had ever seen. And the way they were sparkling with adoration toward the red head was breath-taking. There was no mistaking in his eyes and his smile.

                 He looked at her as if she was his whole world. It was heart-breaking, being able to see these two people, one she knew and the other she didn’t, sharing something she could never have with Lin. She realized that he looked at Lilibeth that way because he was alone, because she wasn’t there. She remembered all these times she had seen them together and they had been just friendly.

                   She wondered how Lin had managed to hide his feelings for the redhead when she was around. She smiled sadly, defeated. It explained so much things. Why he would always come from work happy. Why he would spend more and more time in this bar or in Philipp’s café. Why he would always speak highly of her. It was because he loved her, incredibly so.

                 She couldn’t even be mad at her. Because knowing Lilibeth, the girl was sweet, and she would never hurt a single soul. She simply fell in love with Lin. Just like she did five years prior. She couldn’t even be mad at Lin. Because he had tried to protect her and preserve her. She knew he still loved her, but not as he used to. At least she knew that the talk was going to be easier than she excepted. She swallowed hard and made her way back to the flat.

                 She patiently waited until Lin came back home. Yet, because of all of her work, she quickly fell asleep. She woke up when she felt a kiss pressed on her forehead. Mike would tend to do that too. It was already the beginning of the afternoon. She didn’t know if Lin slept in their apartment at all. She couldn’t help but notice how he smelled a little bit of Lilibeth’s perfume. He seemed different. She was going to speak but he cut her first.

 

“Vanessa, I think we need to talk," she closed her mouth.

“Alright.”

“I… I haven’t been… truthful with you, lately,” he admitted. “I… I got quite… close with… hum… with Lilibeth,” he looked down, almost ashamed. “Ever since I met her I… I couldn’t stop thinking about her and…”

“I saw you,” she blurted out and he tilted his head in confusion. “The two of you at the Chélie.”

“Oh ?” realization dawned upon his face. “Oh.”

“I arrived a day earlier,” she explained. “I really needed to talk to you. But when I saw the way you looked at her…” she almost chuckled. “I’m pretty sure you never looked at me that way,” he opened his mouth to speak but she kept on talking. “But that’s okay, I understand.”

“I’m sorry, Vanessa,” he apologized, sincerely. “I never meant to hurt you.”

“I know,” she smiled. “But I have to be honest with you, Lin,” she paused. “I… I think we both know how it is going to end,” Lin swallowed hard as she kept talking. “We have not really been honest with each other lately. With you spending more and more time with Lilibeth and I with Mike… I guess it was bound to happen.”

“Mike ? From work ?” he tilted his head.

“Yeah. We’ve always been close friends but as time passed by I realized that… maybe there was more to it,” she thought about the kiss she shared with him during her business trip. “Just like you did with Lilibeth,” the was a pregnant pause.

“Are you not mad ?”

“About what ? I can’t really blame you Lin, because I did the same," she honestly replied. “We’ve both been distant and we’ve both taken comfort in someone else’s arms," she shrugged. “I do care about you.”

“But not the way you used to,” he finished, because he perfectly knew what she felt. And by the look she gave him, he knew that she knew it too. She nodded. “I guess this is it, right ?”

“Yes.”

                       They both stood up and Lin hugged her.

“Thank you, V, for everything.”

“And thank you Lin.”

 

* * *

 “I want a wedding dress like this," Lilibeth hummed as she was twirling in her costume.

“Don’t we all ?” Jasmine asked, while she was adjusting her makeup.

“Won’t it be too much ?” Alex, who was with them in their lounge, pondered. “I mean, for the reception, you can’t actually sit with a dress like this and eat.”

“That’s why we have a second dress, Alex,” the red head chuckle.

“You do ?” he scrunched his nose. “My wife didn’t.”

“Perhaps because she had a convenient dress.”

“Yeah, I think that was it.”

“Where’s Lin ?” Jas wondered. “The next show is in half an hour and he still isn’t here. He’s coming right ?”

“Of course he is, I’m pretty sure he was busy with something.”

“Or he fell asleep in the subway, once again,” they all chucked.

“Come on guys, it happened once or twice,” Lilibeth retorted playfully.

“Yeah but who does that ?”

“Someone who never gets enough sleep,” Lin replied, making them jump.

“Where do you even come from !?” Jas screamed.

“Puerto Rico.”

“Fuck you, Lin,” they laughed. “Don’t give me heart attack like this. I don’t want to die now.”

“I bet you don’t. By the way, a certain Mr. Ramos is looking for you,” she beamed and Lilibeth couldn’t help but smile.

              Even though they’d been together for several months, they truly adored one another. She knew it was going to last.

“Well, I’ll join him. See ya,” she waved as she left. By the look Lin had on his face, Alex decided to give them some privacy.

“I’ll go too, I have to get ready.”

“See ya, Alex.”

“See ya.”

                When they were both left alone in the lounge, a comfortable silence settled. Lilibeth was now adjusting her makeup, almost done. She chuckled when she saw her friend’s wild hair.

“Lin, you should get ready. You don’t want to turn into another Groff, right ?”

“You bet I wouldn’t. Besides, they can only be one Groffsauce,” he dramatically sighed. “Just like there can only be one girlfriend,” Lilibeth froze right in the stop, looking at him through the reflection of the mirror. He was smiling, hell no, he was _beaming_.

“Did you… ?” he silently nodded. Lilibeth blinked her tears away and sighed in relief.

“Now, I do have something for you, Miss Williams,” she arched an eyebrow as he pulled out his phone and a little piece of paper. “Okay, look,” a beat started playing and that’s when she realized he was going to rap. “ ** _Hey, yo. I know it’s the perfect time, so you can hear me rhyme, cause I got a question to ask, but please bear with me, it’s not an easy task. Right now it’s just you and me, and I'm so glad that now I’m finally free, to ask you to be mine so I can make you shine. I’ve dreamt about you so many times, I’m kinda worried it’s one of my biggest crimes. I have so many plans for you and I but only if you’re willing to give it a try. I’m thinking about dancing, I’m thinking about ice cream. Let us wine and dine, everything’ll be fine. Yeah, damn, you’re perfect and so lovely, I know it’s a good idea, so please, go on a date with me_** ?”

            She smiled, biting the inside of her cheeks to prevent it from growing wider. She took a deep breath, overwhelmed.

“Okay. That was… the best… way to ask me on a date I think,” he chuckled. “No one has ever rapped for me before.”

“Get used to it, babe,” he winked and she smiled at the pet name. “So ?”

“Yeah, I’m in.”

 

               Saying that they were both over the moon would be an understatement. Everyone noticed that something was different, but no one dared to say anything about it. Except Alex. Wise, wise Alex who immediately shot a grin at Lilibeth when he saw Lin arrive with his arms around her waist. Alex who wiggled his eyebrows during _Helpless._ Her sweet Alex. Once the rehearsals were done, Lilibeth practically ran into her lounge to change as quickly as possible and when she opened her door to leave, Jasmine was barely coming in.

 

“Wow, you’ve already changed ? Wait…”

“I can’t !” she grinned as she left. “I have a date !” she quickly knocked on Lin’s door.

“Come in !” she entered as he was putting his shoes on. “You did get changed quick.”

“I’m a little bit excited,” she admitted and he chuckled.

“You are so cute,” he got up and walked toward her before cupping her face in his hand. “And now I can do this…” he whispered as he slowly kissed her. Lilibeth practically melted into the kiss as her hands found their way into his hair. “As much as I want to.”

“I’d love to kiss you all night but didn’t you say that we had something planned tonight ?” she teased, still dazed by the kiss she shared with him. He dramatically sighed before nodding.

“Come on, love,” he took her hand and gently squeeze it. “I believe we have a date tonight,” he never let go as they were walking down the street. Lilibeth was glowing, radiating happiness as she was looking at him. They were both smiling.

“Where are you taking me ?”

“Fancy restaurant.”

“You’re kidding ? I’m not dressed for a fancy restaurant.”

“You’re perfect,” he retorted, kissing her.

“And you can’t just walk in here and say, hey, I know it’s late but we got hungry and…”

“You really think I’m this stupid ?” he scoffed, feigning offense. “I called.”

“When ?”

“A week ago,” she put her hands on her hips.

“What if I had said no ?” he laughed.

“Please, as if you’d miss an opportunity to go out with me.” he arched an eyebrow as he smirked. “Now that I am single.”

“Oh, but are you really single now ?” she smirked back.

“God I love you.”

“And I am hungry,” she laughed. “Hurry up !”

 

             If their clothes weren’t appropriate, the waiters didn’t say anything about it. Maybe it was because they knew Lin. He was used to come here. The place was quite quiet and almost empty. They knew that it was because it was quite late, but they didn’t mind the intimacy. Their table was situated next to a window. He knew Lilibeth adored the view. And boy, she did. Her eyes were sparking with joy. They both looked a mess, they probably should have gone for a shower first, but their hunger was way more important.

           Her hair was tied in a messy bun with a lot of wild locks framing her ever so perfect face. She still wore her stage makeup and the wedding ring, as he noticed. She’d been too excited to leave to even realize she didn’t take it off. He didn’t mind at all. He could grow used to the view. He snapped a photo of her and twitted it. The picture was beautiful. We could only see the shadow of Lilibeth’s perfect profile as she was looking at the buildings through the windows, smiling.

 

**@Lin_Manuel : I’m currently the luckiest man on earth. #blessed**

 

“What are you doing ?”

“Taking a picture of you.”

“Again ?” he chuckled.

“I’ll never have enough pictures of you.”

“Cheesy.”

“You like it,” he retorted and she shook her head as she took a sip of her wine.

“You know… it feels almost unreal,” she admitted as she was admiring the view.

“What ?”

“Us," she shrugged. “I mean… I’ve been longing for this…” she gestured to the two of them. “Ever since I met you. I… I don’t really know how to explain. Meeting you was like…”

“Having all the ‘I love yous’ said at once ?” he guessed and she gently smiled.

“Exactly… It’s amazing Lin, it’s like… you always find the right words to say. Every single time.”

“I…” his smile slowly faded. “I’m not really sure, I’ve hurt you in the past, with my words.”

“You were just jealous,” she shrugged.

“Yeah, I guess I was…” he sighed, zoning out a little bit.

“But hey,” she squeezed his hand and he gazed up to meet her eyes. “It’s alright now. We’re together and nothing hurts.”

“I love you.”

“I love you too, Lin.”

              It made his heart go.

“I’ve been wanting this for so long, you have no idea,” she chuckled.

“Believe me, I do. Been there, done that,” he joined her.  “We’re going to work, Lilibeth,” he promised. “I know this because we are just perfect for each other, right ?” she nodded. “Oh my god I can’t believe I get to call you mine,” she blushed.

“Stop with all of this, you’re embarrassing me.”

“I could never embarrass you,” he taunted, sticking his tongue out.

“Have you made your choices ?” the waited asked.

“Yes.”

 

               The night was particularly pleasant. Lin would never stop touching Lilibeth in any way possible. If he wasn’t holding his hand, his feet would press against her leg, his finger would brush against her skin. She didn’t mind. Once they were done eating, they decided to head back home. And by home, it meant Lin’s apartment. He explained Lilibeth that Vanessa had decided to go back live to her parents’ house. She had decided to sell the furniture she had bought, meaning that the flat was fleet furnished compared to the last time Lilibeth had come.

               He asked her if she didn’t mind sleeping on the mattress, because he didn’t have a bed base anymore. She simply smirked and told him that she didn’t mind not sleeping at all. That made him stutter, which was quite unexpected but since he looked so cute with his flushed cheeks, she had decided to let it slide. She loved Lin’s flat. He had an amazing view of the Georges Washington Bridge and she’d be damned if she didn’t snap a picture of it. As she comfortably sat on the couch, Lin offered her a glass of wine, which she gratefully accepted.

 

“I really like your flat,” she stated.

“Now that it had less furniture of course,” he sneered and she couldn’t help but giggle.

“You know what I mean. But yeah, it does seem quite empty.”

“I was a broke substitute teacher, when I met Vanessa. I didn’t have as much money as I did know. So obviously, being an attorney, she was able to buy more things,” he shrugged. “But I’m okay with it. It’s like a new start,” she interlaced her fingers with his and smiled.

“It’s a new start.”

 

               Lilibeth pretended not to notice how Lin would squeeze her hand, refusing to let her go, fearing that at any moment she was going to disappear. He was glad she didn’t find my clingy or anything. She seemed to like the affection and attention. The Puerto Rican couldn’t but smile when he saw how she leaned into his touch.

When he woke up, the first thing he saw was Lilibeth. And he clearly felt blessed. The sun and not risen yet and he couldn’t wait for its ray to kiss her beautiful red hair, just like it did in her flat. Feeling overjoyed, he silently started to write a letter, on his bedroom floor.

 

_My dearest, Vairon,_

_I cannot believe what I am living. You are gracing my life with your darling self and I will forever be grateful to God for sending you to me. Because I refuse to believe that our meeting was a simple coincidence. You and I are meant to be, Lilibeth. If there is only one thing I am sure about, this is it. I can finally call you mine and I swear that you make me the happiest man on earth by granting me this honour._

_It is not my intention to scare but you I have so many plans for us. I am totally fine to work around your schedule because you are my future and I don’t know what I would do without you. I am delighted to know that you play my wife not only on stage but in real life too. Well, my ‘wife’ not yet, because I didn’t really put the ring on you yet. But that, it’s a question for another day._

_I have so many questions I want to ask you, Lilibeth and it pains me to know that I have to wait because I know that some things take time. I have this impression that we’ve been together for years. Maybe we have, in another life. I believe that we are soulmate, Lilibeth. Do you think the same ? The way my soul longs and aches for yours is just another proof, I am sure._

_Remembering us the way we are,_

_Lin._

 

                 When he realized that Lilibeth wasn’t going to wake up any soon, he had decided to make breakfast.  He truly hoped that she wouldn’t wake up because of the noise so he tried to be as quiet as possible. He wanted to be the first thing she saw in the morning. He woke her up with a small kiss in her neck, his trimmed beard tickling her. She smiled, barely awaken.

 

“Hey.”

“Hey,” he breathed and he truly felt blessed. “You so look beautiful. I could marry you right know,” she chucked and lazily threw him a pillow in his face.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” she sniffled. “Now, what’s that wondrous smell ?”

“I made you breakfast,” he sat cross-legged in front of her as she took in what he had prepared.

“Wow, that is a lot of food Lin,” she frowned as she saw the pancakes, omelette, bacon…

“I figured it out you’d be hungry after all of yesterday’s… sport,” he smirked and she arched an eyebrow. “That was quite tiring, you know.”

“Is that so ?”

“Yeah but you know, I rested long enough, if you want to…” he wiggled his eyebrows. She kissed his cheek.

“Do you have a balcony ?” he slowly nodded.

“Yeah, but it’s not huge. Why ?”

“Do you mind if we eat our breakfast there ? I’d like some fresh hair.”

“No problem,” he took the tray as she got up to get dressed and put it on the table on the balcony. He quickly poured two cups of coffee into the mugs.

“It’s cold,” she whined and he gazed up. He couldn’t help but beam when noticed that she was wearing one of his hoodies.

“You look incredibly cute,” he complimented, kissing her hair as she took a seat.

“Look at this hoodie, okay ?”

“Why ?”

“Because you’re never getting it back.”

“Oh, god, I’ll have to hide all of my clothes,” she smirked.

“As if that would stop me,” he dramatically sighed.

“Touché, Lilibeth, touché.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta reader : HeyItsValeria13   
> Your kudos and comments give me life.


	21. A TALENT OF HERS

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lin and Lilibeth become official.

 

 

                    Lilibeth and Lin came to an agreement concerning the way they would announce the news to their friends and family. Well, Lin had already done it by tweeting the picture of her at the restaurant.  
                    His fans were quick to respond, asking if it was official. It was no secret that almost everyone in his fanbase shipped him with Lilibeth, except for the few who preferred him with Vanessa.

                  The idea came up in the morning, when they were doing a face mask. It had been Lilibeth's idea, telling him that they both needed a little bit of rest and that a good bath and a face mask would make everything better.  
                  They looked both atrociously ridiculous with their green faces, but they didn't really care. Lin snapped a picture of them and posted it on his twitter with the caption : _Relationship goals._ She laughed at it and simply decided to post a picture of Lin, she had taken during the rehearsal, on her instagram.

 

 

  But she called Alex, though. She had to. She told him everything that had happened and he couldn't be happier for his friends. He teased her by telling her that he could already hear the wedding bells. The texts they got from their friends arrived quickly and soon there was a facetime with the whole HamFam, except for Leslie and Daveed, who probably were busy.

" _That's what I'm talking about !_ " Anthony boasted as Jasmine rolled her yes.

" _You guys are so cute together,_ " Renée smiled.

" _Wait, what ?_ " Oak asked,confused. " _You two ? When ?_ "

" _Oh my God, do you even have eyes ?_ " Jasmine whined. " _They've been dancing around each other ever since they met !_ "

" _Okay,_ " he slowly nodded. " _But how ?_ "

Everybody laughed.

" _What about Vanessa ?_ " Chris asked him.

"Yeah, but we broke up," Lin explained as he took a sip of his coffee. "In good terms, though."

" _Oh okay._ "

"Hey, how do you think of a HamFam bounding night, tonight eh ?" he asked. "We could watch a movie, chat a little bit, you know."

" _Sure. We crash at your place ?_ " Jazz asked.

"Why not, I have plenty of room for you guys."

" _We can take care of the drinks, if you want,_ " Anthony offered.

" _We can get some food too_ ," Oak offered. " _Chips and shits._ "

"Okay I can make some pizza..." Lilibeth trailed off.

" _But Lilibeth you have to bring that gamecube of yours because there's no way I'm not taking a revenge on Mario kart,_ " Anthony frowned and she clearly heard Jasmine sigh next to him.

" _Babe I love you but please, you have to realize that you're never going to beat her._ "

"She's right," Lin nodded. "Even I couldn't beat her."

" _Cause you suck,_ " Oak chuckled.

"Hey, you never actually played against her ! We'll see if I still suck tonight once she beats your ass !"

           He looked at Lilibeth.

"Don't let me down, baby."

"I just might, just to see Oak's reaction."

" _I love you, Lilibeth_ !" the man shouted and she couldn't help but laugh.

"Guys, it's not like we don't love you or anything, but we have to get this," she gestured to their faces. "Out of our faces."

" _Alright, we'll see you tonight !_ "

"See ya."

        They ended the call and immediately washed their faces.

"I'm glad we're not working today," Lin hummed as they were getting dressed.

             He didn't know if he was supposed to take pleasure in sharing such a domestic thing with Lilibeth but he couldn't help himself.

"Same for me. I'll have to swing by my apartment, you'd like to come ?" she asked and he nodded.

"Yeah, you could actually bring some stuff here, you know."

        She looked at him.

"I mean... I'm not asking you to move in or anything, I'm just telling you that it'd be more convenient."

"Chill Lin," she laughed. "I'm totally okay with that. I know for a fact that I'm going to spend a lot of time here. So, I'd rather have my clothes instead of stealing all of your hoodies."

"Yeah, please don't," he begged but she could hear the smile in his voice. "After we grab your things we should go grocery shopping for tonight, what do you think ?"

"Good idea."

       Since they felt quite lazy today, they decided to take a cab to go to Lilibeth's flat. Once inside, she opened the window so that a little bit of fresh air could enter, while Lin just hung around. She quickly made her way to her room and packed a small suitcase.  
      She didn't want to fall short on clothes or anything. She sang, mostly to herself as she grabbed a few books and her notebooks. She wanted to be able to write her songs at Lin's place too, if needed.

       Once she got everything she needed, they left their flat, quickly made their way to Phillip's so they could grab a coffee before going to the grocery store. Lilibeth couldn't help but smile at how domestic their situation was and she was completely fine with it.  
      She wouldn't change it for the world. Lin made sure that she got everything she needed for her pizzas. He also begged her to make an apple crumble. (She really couldn't say no to those eyes.) Obviously, she accepted.

      At some point, she got a call from Atlas, who had seen the picture on instagram. He told her that he really liked his brother-in-law and that he couldn't wait to meet him. Speaking of that, their mother wanted to have him for dinner on Christmas.  
       She explained him that his family probably wanted him with them, but she promised she would ask. She asked some news about Molly, who apparently aced all of her tests while her mother had taken a liking into gardening. In winter. How typical of her.

      Lilibeth sighed as they finally made their way back to the flat. Lin offered to get her stuff into his closet, telling her that he had plenty of room, since Vanessa had left and that meanwhile, she could put what they bought into the fridge.  
      She quickly tweeted a couple of stuff she had on her mind before cooking. She couldn't help but smile when she got a twitter notification from Lin. It was from the picture she had just posted, of him standing in an aisle in the store.

 **@thesubwaygirl : You're the prettiest silhouette the grocery shop will ever see.**  
|  
 **@Lin_Manuel : @thesubwaygirl I can't believe I get to call you mine.**

"You know... my mom actually wants to meet you," she said, making him come and sit at the kitchen isle so he could hear her better.

"Oh ?" he arched an eyebrow. "Is that so ?'

"Yeah..." she scratched the back of her neck. "Atlas may have told her that we are together. And... well, she'd heard about you a long time ago, pretty much the day I met you. And she wants you to come for Christmas. If that's okay with you. I mean... I know that your family probably wants you around and..."

"Love, you're rambling," he chuckled and kissed her forehead. "I'd love to," he replied and she grinned. "We can stay there for a couple of weeks, right ? I wanted to come to your brother's competition anyway. It's more convenient if I come earlier. And I won't pass a seven-hour flight with you."

"I'm not really sure it's a seven-hour flight... but, I'm glad you're okay with that. I don't want you to feel pressured or anything."

"I'm not," he shrugged. "I'm okay with meeting your family. I'll be more scared for you to meet mine."

"Why's that ?"

"The moment my mother will see you she will talk to you about weddings and babies and everything."

"I'm fine with that," she laughed, throwing her head on the back.

"Really ?"

               Her laughter faded as she looked at him.

"Of course, Lin. I do want to get married and I do want children. I think I can handle."

              She gently squeezed his hand.

"Well that's good to know..." he started.

"Please, don't drop on one knee and ask me to marry you right now, I didn't even have a second coffee today."

            He only laughed. He promised her that he had no such intentions today. He quickly snapped a picture before posting it on twitter : _When she starts baking it's over for you bitches._

"I forgot how you really like to post on twitter."

"Do you want me to stop ?"

"No, not really," she grinned. "I like it. Plus, I do use Instagram a lot. Wouldn't you like to join ?"

"I'm not sure. I prefer twitter. And if I had an Instagram account, I wouldn't let anyone know what it is. So I can enjoy your posts without being... followed by my fans."

"Yeah, they tend to do that," she slightly chuckled as she washed her hands.

"I love them, you know. I'm fine with sharing things on twitter but sometimes there are some things I don't want to share. I mean, some things I don't want to share with _them._ "

"I totally get it," she nodded. "Hey, do you want to help me with the pizzas ?"

"Say no more."

       The evening came sooner than expected. Lilibeth was arranging the table when the bell rang for the first time. Lin went to open the door and she heard Jasmine and Anthony's voices. Once they entered the living room, she greeted them with a hug and a kiss on the cheek for Jazz.  
      A couple of minutes later, the others started to arrive by waves and the living room table was quickly covered with pizzas and beers.

"Oh wait, it must be Daveed. I'll go get it," she said as Lin eyed her.

             She quickly opened the door and smiled when she saw her curly haired friend.

"Well, hello beautiful."

"I'm the one supposed to say that," she teased back as she took him into her arms. "Come we have..."

"Wait."

                He gently grabbed her wrist so they wouldn't join the others right away.

"What is it ?" she questioned, tilting her head on the side.

"I just wanted to tell you that I am really happy for Lin and you."

                Her smile grew wider.

"You both deserve it. I know how much he loves you and how much you love him."

              She gently squeezed his hand.

"Thanks, Daveed."

            He liked the way his name sounded on her tongue. She pronounced it the French way. It made him love her even more.

"And if you need anything, remember that I'm here, right ? I'm your best friend."

"Rascal's going to be jealous, be careful," she teased and he couldn't help but smile back.

"You okay guys ?"

                   They turned their head towards Lin who had joined them.

"Yeah, we were just talking."

"Hey Daveed."

"Hey Lin."

"You coming ?" he asked them and they nodded.

"Sure."

"Lin, isn't your apartment emptier than the last time I came ?" Chris asked his best friend as they were both in the kitchen while the others were fighting over which movie to put in.

"Yeah, Vanessa sold the furniture she bought. She went back to her parents' house."

"She didn't want to keep the flat ?" he asked, slightly surprised.

"Nope," Lin shook his head. "She told me that she didn't really want it."

"Well, that's a good luck for you," he smirked and the Puerto Rican chuckled.

"Yeah, right."

"You really got lucky," he said as he looked at the red head who was taking selfies with Jasmine and Jonathan.

"I guess I did."

                 He sounded as if he couldn't believe it.

"For how long have you loved her ?"

               He turned his head to look at Chris. Right, he did tell Alex everything but not so much to his best friend.

"Ever since I met her," he truthfully answered. "I... I think it was love at first sight."

"But that was months ago."

"Yeah, well, I waited. More like, she waited. Being with Vanessa was... complicated."

"Is that why you broke up ?"

"Yes and no. We had our disagreement."

"Children ?"

             Lin had already told Chris about the issue of children he had with Vanessa. He had thought that one day she would change her mind but apparently, he had been mistaken.

"Yes. I couldn't... I couldn't propose to her. I couldn't..."

"You're still friends ?"

"Yeah, I guess. It feels slightly weird but it's okay. At least, I get to be with her now," he said as he lovingly looked at the red head.

             Sensing his gaze on her, she turned her head and beamed at him, before being pulled into another discussion with Oak and Daveed.

"I haven't seen you this happy in a while, Lin," Chris confessed as he watched his friend. "It feels good."

"I'm happier now," he simply replied with a small smile. "I... god, I love this woman so much."

"As if we couldn't tell," he teased.

"Hey, you know that I'm actually going to France for Christmas."

                Chris raised his eyebrows.

"Really ?"

"Yeah ! Catherine, Lilibeth's mother, wants to meet me."

"Oh... it's getting serious Lin..." he joked.

"I'm already looking for ring," he blurted out and Chris almost chocked on his beer.

"W-what ?"

"Y-yeah ?"

"You're already going to propose ? Are you sure about this ?"

"I've never been surer for anything in this life," he honestly responded.

                Chris hummed and gently patted Lin's back.

"Well man, I'm glad you found your happiness."

"Me too, Jackson, me too."

______

      When Lilibeth and Lin arrived at the theatre with everyone's coffee, they were greeted like messiahs. It still was early, and caffeine was always welcomed in the place. Coming back to the theatre as a couple was an incredible experience.  
      Because they both knew that they didn't have to pretend any more. All the kisses, all the loving looks... It felt like a weight had been lifted of their shoulders. Lilibeth couldn't wait for her songs to come.  
       She left... liberated somehow. It probably was the best job she ever had, falling in love with Lin on stage, every night. She could definitely work with that. She couldn't help but feel giddy during _Helpless._

**_My sister made her way across the room to you_ **

      Lin looked at Renée who smiled and pointed at Lilibeth, just like every other day. But it wasn't every other day, was it ?

**_I got nervous thinking what's she gonna do ?_ **

"I think this one's quite smitten with you, Lin."

**_She grabs your arm, and I'm thinking 'I'm through'_ **

      He turned his head and looked at the redhead who was looking at him lovingly and singing at the same time.

 **_Then you look back at me and suddenly I'm_ ** **_helpless_ **

      His heart fluttered.

"Be careful with this one, Lin," she warned and he nodded without speaking.

                 They kept on going with the song.

_**My life's gon' be fine, cause Eliza's in it** _

      And Lilibeth knew, she just knew that these words for her and nor for Eliza. The way he looked at her while he said that sentence simply proved it. The rest of the day went rather smoothly. Andy couldn't help but be pleased to see how energetic the two of them were.  
      He was satisfied with their dancing today and before they knew it, it was time to go. Lilibeth couldn't wait to go home so she could just cuddle up with Lin and watch a movie.  
      But she had something to do first. She quickly left the stage to grab her notebook in her lounge, leaving Lin with Alex.

"So, finally, eh ?" Alex grinned, coming up on stage to join Lin.

"Yeah. It feels... so unreal, you know ?"

             The curly haired man nodded in comprehension.

"I can't believe how lucky I am."

"Be careful with her, okay ? She's waited a long time for it."

"Don't worry, I'm not going to spoil it. Damn, I'm already ready to put a ring on her finger."

                  Alex simply chuckled.

"Ask her to move in first, that'd be a good first step."

"That's actually a good idea."

"Of course it is."

"Hey Lin."

                  He turned around to see his sweet Lilibeth, still in costume.

"Yes, love ?"

"I... I wrote something and Alex helped," she said. "It's... _Burn_."

" _Burn_?" he tilted his head in confusion. "But we already have this song."

"No, it's a different one. Like... my own interpretation of the thing ? I... I don't think Eliza was naïve enough to be ignorant of what happened between Alexander and Angelica. And in _Burn_ we don't mention their children... I think it's a shame," she shrugged. "So, I wrote a different version."

"What is it called ?" he asked, genuinely interested.

" _First burn_."

"Sing it to me."

                He straightened his jacket.

"Lucky us, we're still in costume. Go ahead."

               She looked at Alex and nodded. The latter started playing.

" ** _I saved every letter you wrote me, from the moment I saw you, I knew you were mine. You said you were mine, I thought you were mine_**."

               Alexander swallowed hard.

" ** _Do you know what Angelica said when I told her what you'd done ?_** " she questioned and he frowned. " **She said... you married an Icarus, he has flown too close to the sun** ** _._** "

             She raised her hand as he tried to come closer.

" ** _Don't, take another step in my direction,_** " she shook her head, frowning. " ** _I can't be trusted around_** _**you**_."

               She took a step back.

" ** _Don't think you can talk your way into my arms."_**

             She held herself, with a sort of melancholic despair.

" ** _Into my arms..._** "

"That's really good," Jasmine whispered, as they were looking from backstage.

                 Daveed silently nodded, bewildered by the woman singing in front of his friend.

" ** _I'm burning the letters you wrote me_**."

             She turned her back to Alexander and looked at him over her shoulder.

" ** _You can stand over there if you want, I don't know who you are. I have so much to learn..._** "

              She shook her head.

" ** _I'm re-reading your letters and watching them burn."  
_**

She closed her eyes.

" ** _I'm watching them burn..._** "

             Eliza looked at him with a hard stare, frowning.

" ** _You published the letters she wrote you,"_** she accused. ** _"You told the whole world how you brought this girl into our bed. In clearing your name, you have ruined our lives_**."

             Alexander looked down in shame as she took a step forward.

" ** _Heaven forbid someone whisper "_** she put her hand next to her mouth as she fixed him with a malicious stare. **_"He's part of some scheme"_**.

             He tilted his head, his eyes wide open.

" ** _Your enemies whisper so you have to scream !_** " she cried, yet her voice was still as powerful as before.

            He blinked a couple of times, clearly overwhelmed.

" ** _I know about whispers..._** "

             She clenched her fists, a sardonic smile on her lips as she leaned toward him.

" ** _I see how you look at my sister._** "

            Taken aback, he opened his mouth, almost forgetting that it was just a song, but she cut him off.

" ** _Don't,_** " she warned. " ** _I am not naïve, I have seen women around you. Don't think I don't see how they fall for your charms. All your charms,_** " she screamed, holding her head into her hand.

              She straightened her composure and looked at him.

" ** _I'm erasing myself from the narrative,_** " she almost whispered, taking a step back. " ** _Let future historians wonder how Eliza reacted when you broke her heart_**."

               She pointed at him, tears streaming down her face. " ** _You have thrown it all away. Stand back, watch it burn. Just watch it all burn_**."

              She put her hand on her chest.

" ** _And when the time comes, explain to the children_**."

             A flash of Atlas and Molly crossed her mind.

" ** _The pain and embarrassment you put their mother through_**."

                He felt chills kiss his skin as she pointed a finger at him.

" ** _When will you lean that they are your legacy ?_** " she wept, tightly clenching the fabric of her dress. " ** _We are your legacy !_** "

                How could he have been so blind ?

" ** _If you thought you were mine, don't._** "

              She was now breathing hard as Lin stood in front of her, frozen in time. Just like the first time he heard her sing. She shook her head and then smiled, back to being Lilibeth.

"I..." he blinked. "Fuck Lilibeth. That was... Oh my fucking God, you are so good !" he beamed and took her into his arms.

                  She chuckled.

"You like it ?" she asked. "I admit it, I stole a few things from _Burn_ , but I thought that it was okay."

"This is absolutely brilliant. I mean, I couldn't have done it better."

"Shut up. You know you could have."

"No Lilibeth, I am serious."

            He took her hand in his and gently squeezed it.

"You really are talented. It's incredible. Your song is beautiful."

"It's not mine," she shook her head. "It's Eliza's."

"I love you. Really."

"I love you too."

"We need to record this," she chuckled.

"Okay."

"HOLY SHIT LILIBETH !"

                She turned around to see her friends coming toward them.

"Oh, I didn't know you were there," she blushed, chuckling.

"THAT WAS FUCKING AMAZING !!!" Jazz screamed and hugged her tightly.

"She's right, man," Anthony nodded.

"You wrote this ?" Daveed asked.

"Yes."

"You're really talented, Lilibeth."

                  Lin looked at Daveed as Lilibeth beamed.

"Thanks, Diggs."

"Anytime, darlin'," he smiled as he kissed her temple.

"I told you he would love it !" Alex grinned.

"Alex, you are the best," Lilibeth finger gunned. "I wouldn't have done it without you !"

"Shut up you know you would have !"

______

       Lilibeth found herself spending more time in Lin's flat than in hers, just as predicted. Lin lived closer to the theatre, actually. So, it was just a question of convenience. She spent most of her time revising her piece of her brother's competition on Lin's beautiful piano.  
      That was something she missed. Her flat was small and she couldn't have a real piano in it. Every time she would play, Lin would find himself sitting next to her, observing her with such an adoration that made her toes curl up in her shoes.

       Lin was absolutely extra sweet with her. He truly was perfect. Everything felt so natural with him, she had this impression that they had been together for years and years. She felt like she knew him better than everyone else.  
      When she called Atlas back to tell him that they were actually coming for Christmas, he was beyond delighted. He asked her what kind of gift Lin would like and she had to admit that she didn't really know. She promised him she would text him some ideas as soon as she could.

"Lilibeth these yoga pants are a sin," Lin whined as she passed in front of him while he was watching Netflix.

              She simply rolled her eyes and chuckled.

"You can't except me not to do anything about those," he continued, quickly following her in the kitchen.

"Oh ? And what do you plan to do ?" she questioned, tilting her head, her lips slightly parted in a way she knew Lin couldn't resist.

            His eyes darkened and she mentally smirked. _  
_

_I win._

"You," he simply replied before picking her up and taking her to the bedroom.

* * *

       After writing a sixth letter in a span of one week, Lin started writing songs. There no longer was any repression of his feelings for Lilibeth. Since he had wanted her for so long, he decided to spoil her.  
      He'd surprise her with some flowers at work, he'd always make sure she got her coffee, just the way she liked it, he'd always leave her some notes for her to find around his flat.

      He knew she liked it. He just wanted her to feel like the Queen that she was. He was so glad that she was warmly welcomed by his fans, even though some blamed her for the end of his relationship with Vanessa.  
      But he had explained that they had parted in good terms and still were friends. And that he utterly loved Lilibeth. He couldn't help but smile when he saw a video on twitter and immediately tagged Lilibeth in it.

       Lilibeth chuckled when she looked at her twitter notifications. Sure she got a hell of new followers, ever since Lin and her went public. She was okay with that.  
      She simply ignored the haters, she didn't really have time for them anyway. She couldn't help but smile when she saw Lin's mention. It was a tweet, well more like a video, with a lot of retweets and favourites.

 

 

 

       She arched an eyebrow and played the video. Two seconds in she already knew what it was. They were in the subway and she was singing _Take me to church._ She had no idea that their meeting had been recorded.  
       Hell, she didn't even notice that she was being filmed. The angle of the camera showed a part of her profile and back yet at the same time we could see people who were watching her; just in front of her. Lin was there.

        He smiled and _oh, he smiled._ No one could be fooled. He was utterly bewitched by her. And she hadn't even notice him, at first. His mouth was slightly agape as he admired her. That was true. With the way he looked at her, he couldn't fool anyone. He fell in love right at that moment.

|  
 **@Lin_Manuel : @Redandsilk you got me there.**

 

      She couldn't help but smile.

 

 

 

 

 

* * *

 

Come talk to me on my [tumblr](https://tinywhim.tumblr.com/).

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CAREFUL ! I realized that I did not post chapter 10 on AO3, it's called 'LOVE OF MY LIFE', so go check it out ! Sorry for the inconvinience.


	22. IT’S SHOWBIZ BABE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lin and Lilibeth go to Paris. The twins are here.

 

               Lin wasn’t really worried about meeting Lilibeth’s family. He was excited, yet, he couldn’t help but be slightly nervous. He didn’t know much French, even though he had taken some classes so he could impress his girlfriend. He simply hoped that it was going to be enough to have a normal conversation. He wasn’t really going to talk about politics or anything but hey, we can never know what’s coming for us.

               Yet he couldn’t be more thrilled, he finally was going to go to Paris. He was glad they were staying two weeks because there were so many things he wanted to do there. As cliché as it sounded, he wanted to visit museums and the Eiffel tower too. God, he was such a predictable tourist. He took comfort in knowing that Lilibeth would show him pretty places too.

 

“Are you sure that you packed everything ?” Lilibeth asked him as they were leaving his flat.

“Yup.”

“Okay then, let’s go. We don’t want to miss our flight.”

“I’m pretty sure your mother would kill us if we did.”

“You’re damn right.”

 

               Once they loaded the cab with their stuff, they headed for the airport. Lin was glad that he didn’t really sleep the night before, because he had planned to take a long nap during the almost eight hours flight. Lilibeth decided to watch a movie, _You’ve got mail_ , because it was one of her favourite. But unfortunately, he didn’t sleep during the whole flight.

                When he opened his eyes, his darling Lilibeth was leaning on him, her notebook in her hands, scribbling something. When he asked her about it, she first gave him a quick kiss, the one that made his heart go, and she explained that she was working on her album. She had so many things she wanted to put into songs. Both from her personal experience and from her own fantasies. She told him that he was a great source of inspiration too. It made his chest swell with pride. He gave her the numbers of some good agents he knew. She told him that she’d be interested in being an actress too.

               Quite far from teaching, of course. When he teased her about it, she simply replied that once she got tired of being in the industry, she could be a professor. It was fair, he thought. Yet, if he were a student of hers, he wasn’t sure he’d be able to concentrate on anything she was saying. He already thought about the lucky students who were going to be blessed with her darling self in the classroom.

                They spent the rest of the flight talking about their family, though Lilibeth didn’t really talk about her father. He knew it was a rather touchy subject and he knew it’d be better just to wait until she came to terms with. The last time she told him about him, she was drunk and she cried. He didn’t want the circumstances to be the same. He knew that one day, she would open up about him.

                 He was more than thrilled when they finally landed. He just wanted to walk and to sleep in an actual bed, because they weren’t in first class and the seats weren’t exactly the most comfortable things in the world. He didn’t mind flying, he liked it. When he told Lilibeth about it, her answer was similar to him. _I love in-betweens,_ she told him. _I love being between the sea and the starts._ He realized that everything coming from her mouth was pretty poetry. He quickly twitted as they landed. 

 

 

           Alas, he also needed coffee. Lilibeth had assured him that James made the best coffees.

 

“Who’s James ?”

“Our butler.”

“Your… butler ?” he repeated. “You… you have a butler ?”

“Yes,” she smiled, rather nervously.

“Are you rich or something ?”

“Or something,” she simply replied before they left the plane and took their luggage. “James is the one who’s coming to get us. They’ll be waiting for us at home.”

“Alright,” he nodded as he looked around.

              He had no idea how the man looked like, so he simply relied on the French beauty.

“There he is !” she pointed a man, he couldn’t be more than sixty, perfectly dressed in a suit. He was holding a small ‘Williams’ sign in his hands.

“Bonjour, Mademoiselle Lilibeth,” the gentleman bowed as he saw them arrive. ( _Hello, Miss Lilibeth_ )

“James !” she grinned as she saw the man. “Ça fait longtemps !” ( _James ! It’s been so long !_ )

“En effet mademoiselle, beaucoup trop,” he nodded. “Votre voyage s’est bien passé je présume ?” ( _Indeed, Miss, too long._ _You travelled safety, I presume_ ? )

“Parfaitement," she turned her head. “Oh oui, James, voiçi Lin-Manuel Miranda. Mon petit ami.” ( _Perfectly. Oh yes, James, this is Lin-Manuel Miranda. My boyfriend._ )

“Enchanté, Monsieur,” lin said as he shook hand with the butler, slightly surprising Lilibeth. ( _Nice to meet you, Sir_.)

“Pareillement.” ( _Same to you_.)

“That’s almost all the French I know,” he sheepishly smiled.

“That’s alright, for I know how to speak English as well,” the old man smiled as he took their luggage to put them in the trunk. “Etes-vous prête à y aller, Mademoiselle Lilibeth ?” ( _Are you ready to go, Miss Lilibeth ?_ )

“Oui.” ( _Yes._ )

 

               Once they got in the car, Lilibeth started speaking French with the man. It was always weird to hear her speak in her mother tongue but at the same time, it was bewitching. The way she could easily switch from one language to another was astounding. He was used to do it too, when he spoke Spanish. He could understand a little bit of their conversation.

               He knew that they spoke about Lilibeth’s family and the house. And about her mother’s… garden ? When she saw the confused look on his face, Lilibeth explained him that his mother had decided to take a liking on gardening in the middle of winter. Apparently, it was typical of her. She also told him about James, who had been their butler for more than thirty years.

                He had known Lilibeth her whole life. He raised them, saw her grow up. They were quite close, now that he noticed. He could tell that his girlfriend greatly respected the man. He also learnt that apparently, Lilibeth’s family came from old money and was quite rich. To say that he was surprised would be an understatement. His eyes grew even wider when they entered the estate.

 

“Damn Lilibeth, what’s this house ?”

“What ?”

“It’s huge !?” he squealed.

“My mother always loved huge places,” she shrugged.

“The thing looks like a castle.”

“Please, we have one and it’s nothing like that,” she sneered.

“You have a castle ?” she slowly nodded. “I had no idea you were so loaded,” she chuckled.

“Personally, I’m not. Well, now that my father died, I guess I am but it’s mostly my mother who is. But yeah, we do have a lot of savings.”

“Why do you live in such a shitty flat then ?”

“Hey, fuck you,” she frowned and he only laughed. “And that’s the point of making savings. I don’t have to buy a flat right away you know, just because I have money.”

“You’re richer than me.”

“And prettier~” she sang.

“We already knew that,” he smirked. “But… I have the impression that I don’t know anything about you. Every time I think that I know you, something else just comes.”

“I guess you have plenty of time to figure me out, then,” she winked before leaving the car.

“Je m’occupe de vos affaires, Mademoiselle. Votre mère vous attend dans le salon.” ( _I’ll be taking care of your luggage, Miss. Your mother is waiting for you in the living room_.)

“Merci, James.” ( _Thank you, James._ )

“Je vous en prie.” ( _You’re welcome.)_

“Now come, we have to meet my family, don’t we ?” she said as she took his hands.

“I really, really hope they will like me,” Lin mumbled, feeling more and more nervous as they got closer to the villa.

                  She opened the door and took a deep breath. It smelled like home.

“Maman, on est là !” ( _Mum, we are here !_ )

“Je suis dans la cuisine, mon ange !” ( _I’m in the kitchen, honey !_ ) he silently followed her to what he assumed was the living room.

 

               There stood a beautiful woman. He quickly recognized the heart-shaped face and full lips. Even though she looked around her fifties, she had aged like fine wine and Lin could see the striking resemblance with Lilibeth, despite her straight brown hair. The corners of her eyes were kissed by wrinkles, witnesses of a life full of joy and laughter. Her eyes were the prettiest shade of grey he had ever seen, but they weren’t like Lilibeth’s.

               He had expected to see someone rather uptight and strict but the only think he could think of when he was observing her was how she carried the same energy as Meryl Streep in _Mama mia_ _!_ He had expected someone who pushed their children to the end of their limits to be the best. But he knew better than that. She looked incredibly sweet. She gazed up from the magazine she was reading and beamed when her eyes landed on her daughter.

 

“Lilibeth !” she hugged the woman tightly, kissing her cheek. “Tu es si ravissante, ma chérie !”

“Tu m’as manqué, maman,” her eyes fell on Lin and before he could say anything else, he was pulled into a hug too.

“And nice to meet you Lin !”

“Nice to meet you, Ma’am.”

“Oh please,” she scoffed. “No ‘Ma’am’ here. You can call me Catherine, alright ?” he nodded. “Now I’m pretty sure the two of you must be tired. Why don’t you go into your room while I cook for tonight ?”

“Where are… ?”

“In their room. Molly is studying and Atlas, well… You’ll hear him,” she explained with a knowing smile. “Go on.”

 

           Lilibeth nodded as she led Lin to the stairs. He was quite intimidated by the old building. Even though it looked quite modern, there were some vintage parts that struck with the house, in terms of furniture or wallpapers. And it seemed that Catherine was right, because as soon as they reached upstairs, Lin could hear the tune of a violin. He was surprised when they stopped in the first room on their right, instead of immediately going into what he assumed to be Atlas’s room. She gently knocked on the door and a muffled “ _Entrez._ ” was heard.

           Lin didn’t see her at first. The room was quite big, with what looked hundreds of different books, all about medicine and sciences, tossed on the floor. The sun was barely passing through the venetian blinds, which explained why the lighting in the room coming from the small lamp was totally artificial. He noticed a lot of notes on the walls, most of them in French and complicated words he didn’t understand.

          A sigh escaped pretty pink lips and his eyes were drawn to the figure awkwardly sitting on the desk chair. She was hunched over the desk, maniacally scribbling something in her notebook. He immediately spotted her red hair underneath the hoodie she was wearing.

 

“She’s used to study past midnight, that’s why she always uses her desk lamp,” Lilibeth explained and Molly gazed up to meet them.  “I’m pretty sure she doesn’t even know what time it is.”

“C’est le matin ?” she asked. ( _Is it the morning ?_ )

“Non, milieu d’aprem,” Lilibeth chuckled. “Tu devrais te reposer, c’est les vacances, tu sais.” ( _No, middle of the afternoon. You should get some rest, you know._ _It’s the holidays._ )

“Pas le temps,” she sheepishly shrugged. “Tu penses que je les réussi comment mes examens ? Je taf dur.” ( _Don’t have the time. How do you think I pass my exams ?_ _I work hard._ )

“J’imagine. Mais j’espère que tu pourras au moins te libérer un jour dans la semaine pour qu’on puisse le passer ensemble.” ( _I guess. But I hope you’ll be able to have one day free this week so we can spend it together._ )

“Promis,” she vowed with her heart on her chest.  ( _I promise_.)  She stood up and hugged her sister. “Tu m’as manqué, Lilibeth.” ( _I missed you, Lilibeth._ )

“Tu m’as manqué aussi,” she assured. ( _I missed you too._ )

 

                  Her eyes then settled on Lin. Now that she was standing still, Lin couldn’t help but be amazed by her beauty, despite the dark circles under her eyes, hidden with makeup. It surely was something in this family. He noticed how she inherited her mother’s grey eyes and facial features. He guessed that the red head was from their father.

 

“And you must be Lin, right ?” he nodded and she kissed his cheeks two times. “I have heard a lot about you.”

“Nice to meet you, Molly,” he smiled. “And thank you, for speaking English.”

“I don’t mind, I like it. And well… our mum told us we had to speak English with you during your stay,” she shrugged. “It’s not a big deal and it always helps improving it.”

“That’s really nice. And congrats on your exams ? Lilibeth told me that you aced them.”

“I’m not sure that aced would be the perfect world for that but… yeah. Thanks.”

“She told me you wanted to become a midwife, right ?”

“Yep. I’m really excited. I’m still in my studies and it’s really hard but I know I’m going to do it.”

“Wow I do love that confidence," he teased and she chuckled.

“She was right, you’re really cute you know,” he blinked, not really knowing how to react. “I can’t wait to see _Hamilton._ Lilibeth told me so much about it, I feel like I already know what’s going to happen.”

“Ha ha ha, I really hope you’ll like it,” a timer started ringing and she winked.

“I gotta go, my studies are calling me. I’ll see for dinner,” she said with a salute while she was walking back to her desk.

“Come on, love,” Lilibeth took his hand. “You’ve got to meet Atlas.”

“Okay.”

 

        They walked toward the room where the music came from, sounding louder and louder with each step they made. She had barely opened her door that a red head ran into her arms.

 

“Wow.”

“Tu m’as tellement manqué !” ( _I missed you so much !_ )

“Toi aussi, Atlas !” she laughed. “Atlas, voiçi Lin,” she gestured to the Puerto Rican who shook his hand. Apart from having his features more masculine, he truly was the splitting image of Molly. ( _Me too, Atlas. Atlas, this is Lin._ )

“Nice to meet you, Lin.”

“Nice to meet you, Atlas.”

“Lilibeth told me that you were also coming to the competition ?”

“That’s right. I never really got the chance to hear her play something so… classical,” he explained. “And she told me a lot about your musical talent as well, I was curious,” he could see how Atlas’s chest swelled with pride.

“Well I guess I can’t disappoint you, right ?” Lin chuckled.

“I’m pretty sure you couldn’t even if you tried.”

“Atlas, we’re going to rest a little bit, the flight was exhausting. We’ll talk later, okay ?” Lilibeth said and he nodded.

“Okay.”

 

               With her hand still in Lin’s, she gently guided him to what he presumed to be her room. What amazed him was how huge her bedroom was compared to the one in New York. Back in the US, she could only fit her bed and a few stuffs in it. Her biggest regret was that she couldn’t fit a desk, so she had to write on her couch. He promised himself that he would get her a desk to put in his flat.

               The walls were white, coloured by different notes and pictures hanged across the room. It was rather tidy; even though there were hundreds of books stuffed on several shelves, a desk covered in papers, probably some poems and music. At the corner of the room was a piano which wasn’t dirtied by one speck of dust. He noticed that their stuff was there, he supposed that James was the one who put them there in the first place.

                He was surprised to see that she didn’t really have a bed frame either and by how colourful the plants in her room were. _James is the one who keeps them alive when I’m not here_ , she explained. As she was taking her shoes of, he lifted the fall board and started playing a little something. He raised his eyebrows in surprise when he realized that the piano was not out of tune.

 

“James makes sure that it doesn’t go out of tune. Makes it easier for me to play it when I come back.”

“Can you play something for me ?”

“Not right now, because I’d like to take a nap. But I’ll definitely play something later, okay ?” she offered and he merely nodded, slightly disappointed.

“Okay,” she sighed as she settled on the bed and he quickly joined her.

 

             He felt his muscles immediately relax when his back hit the soft mattress and let out a sinfully moan, making her laugh.

 

“Careful, everyone in the house will hear you.”

“Oh but Lilibeth, it’s so comfy,” he mumbled, feeling his fatigue catching up on him.

“Yes it is. But you’re comfier,” she added, her head resting on his chest. He hummed in contentment and soon enough, they were both asleep.

 

* * *

 

“Atlas, Lilibeth, could you play us a little something please ?” Catherine asked and they both grinned.

 

               Dinner was pleasant. James had helped Catherine cook a roasted beef with some potatoes and vegetables and the butler had prepared a strawberry cake for Lilibeth’s return. Lin learnt that it was her favourite. The Puerto Rican got the time to learn a little bit about the Williams as they were eating.

               He learnt about the weird sleeping habits of Molly and wondered how such a small human being could still be alive and healthy while drinking a minimum of six coffees a day. She simply replied ‘ _It’s showbiz, baby._ ’ And he clearly saw Lilibeth roll her eyes at her little sister’s comment. But still, he knew that she was passionate about what she was doing.

               Ever since she was a child, she wanted to become a midwife, or at least, involved in the medical field. Apparently, studies in France were harder than in America, which is why most of the time, newly graduated French students left their country to go work in the United States. They were guaranteed a good salary. When he had asked her if it was her intention, she said that she wasn’t really sure.

               She liked the US, she had been there several times to visit her sister but she knew that everything about healthcare kinda sucked and she didn’t know if she was ready to give up on French luxury regarding healthcare programs. They also debated about American food and products. Lin knew very well that if one wanted to eat healthy in the US one had to pay for it.

               He was glad that his salary allowed him such luxury. Yes, people were right, French food was absolutely fantastic. As for Atlas, the man was completely talented with a violin between his finger. His goal was to become the first chair of the Paris orchestra. He was still quite young and in the middle of his studies, so he knew that it wasn’t going to happen right away, but Lilibeth told him that he was promising and that his teacher had great plans for him. Lin did not miss the flash of pride that flickered in the young man’s eyes at his sister’s praise.

 

“Sure thing !”

 

             They both stood up and Lilibeth quickly sat on the piano bench. They both stated playing what Lin knew to be the piece for the competition. Atlas was standing right next to her, his eyes closed as he played too. Lin always loved violin. It pulled on your heartstrings.

 

“They are so close,” he whispered as he looked at the red heads.

“You know, when they were little, Atlas would follow her everywhere,” Catherine began as she watched her children playing together. “Even though they had a gap of eight years, it didn’t prevent him from following her around, especially when she played. He first wanted to play piano but then, when he went to one of Lilibeth’s competition, he told me that he wanted to play violin instead.”

“Why ?”

“Because during competition a violinist always needs an accompanist," she simply replied.

“And he wanted Lilibeth to be his accompanist,” he guessed and she nodded.

“Yes. He’s working very hard to make her proud.”

“She is. She tells me so.

“Of course she is. It’s her baby brother we are talking about,” she chuckled and he couldn’t help but smile.

“I’m quite sad knowing that in two weeks we’ll head back home and I’ll go back to eating garbage.” He dramatically sighed, making Catherine laugh.

“Do not fret, my dear. I’ll give you some of my recipes.”

“You are a life saver, Catherine.”

“So I was told.”

              

* * *

 

               On the next day she took him outside, with the twins, so he could see the city. He wasn’t disappointed. He immediately told her that they needed to come back in Spring, so that it wouldn’t be so cold. She laughed and told him that they were in the North, either way, it was going to be cold. With Christmas being in three days, all shops were packed and Lin almost regretted not having bought present for everyone back in the US.

But it wasn’t like he would have been let through by the airport security. They could be real pricks sometimes. At some point, they split us, boys with boys, girls with girls, so that they could get each other’s present. He was glad he wasn’t left alone in the city. He would have gotten himself lost. He could rely on Atlas to guide him through the capital.

 

“Are you going to come to the US once for Hamilton ?” Lin asked as they were walking.

“When you take it to Broadway, of course.”

“Oh, so it’s a “when” and not a “if” ?” he arched an eyebrow. “You put more faith in the project than I do.”

“Ha, as if. We both know that the show is incredible. I mean, it has my sister in it, it’s meant to work,” Atlas proudly grinned and Lin’s heart melted at the sight. “She… She’s incredibly talented, you know ? Everything she does, she excels at it. It’s common knowledge around here.”

“I know.”

“So you’re not with your girlfriend anymore ?”

“My girlfriend ?” he asked, confused.

“Yeah, Vanessa… ? Was it ?”

“Oh, yeah. No I’m not with her. We broke up.”

“So that you could be with my sister.”

“So that I could be with your sister.”

“She really loves you, you know.”

“Is it the moment you warn me off about hurting her ?” he teased and Atlas merely threw his head back as he laughed.

“Not at all, she’s a big girl, she can take care of herself. I mean, I’m not afraid of you hurting her. You love her too much. I see it in your eyes. Even Papa didn’t look at Maman the way you look at Lilibeth,” he explained.

“Oh…”

“So I know she’s in good hands,” Lin put his hand sin his pockets, trying to act casual.

“What… what would you think if I were to propose to her ?” Atlas stopped walking and arched an eyebrow. Even though the man was more than ten year younger than him, Lin felt so small under his gaze.

“Are you asking for my blessing, Lin ?” Atlas teased him and he couldn’t help but chuckle nervously.

“M-Maybe ?”

“I am fine with it,” he assured with a smile. “As long as you keep her happy, I’m fine.”

“I will,” he promised. “I will.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beta : HeyItsValeria13


	23. WHAT'S DECEMBER WITHOUT CHRISTMAS EVE ?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Christmas is here. A call is made. Atlas receives his gift.

 

“Bon Lilibeth, il faut que tu me dises tout.” ( _So Lilibeth, you need to tell me everthing._ )

“Molly, je n’ai pas grand-chose à te dire,” she chuckled. “Et je pensais qu’on parlait anglais ?” ( _Molly, I don’t have much to tell. And I thought we were supposed to speak English?_ )

“Je pensais qu’on devait parler anglais uniquement quand on était avec Lin, pas juste entre nous,” the younger redhead pouted. ( _I thought we only had to speak English when we were with Lin, not among us._ )

“Non, il me semble que maman a dit de parler anglais pendant tout notre séjour. Ça ne peut que t’aider pour plus tard. En plus, tu es forte en anglais.” ( _No, I think that mom did say that you had to speak English during our whole stay. It can only help you, for later. Plus, you’re good with English._ )

“Fine,” she dramatically sighed. “But you know what I mean. Last time we talked, you were still dating… what was his name again ? Dave ?”

“Daveed,” she corrected.

“Yeah, Daveed. From what I saw, he was cute.”

“He’s my best friend. He is… very supportive of our relationship with Lin, you can be sure of that.”

“Really ? Even though you dated ?”

“Yeah.”

“Damn, I need to find myself a man like him,” she chuckled.

“As if you’d have the time for a relationship,” Lilibeth snorted.

“I could !” she retorted with her hands on her hips. 

“Molly, you spend all of your time either studying or at school,” she pointed out.

“Only because I want to be the very best. You know that if you’re the top student, you get to choose where you can go. I have no fear about my position in my academic results. It’s just that… I kinda… I think I need to take a break to. I’m thinking about being an AU Pair.”

“When ?”

“After my bachelor’s degree. I wanted to take a gap year to be an AU pair between my bachelor’s and master’s degree. What do you think ?”

“Have you told mom ?”

“Not yet. I… I wanted to talk about it with you first. I’m really not sure about it at all. It’s just that… I really need a break but at the same time I don’t want to do nothing for a whole year, I want to work. I love travelling too.”

“But why an AU pair ?”

“I love children,” she simply shrugged. “It’s an absolute win.”

“I think… that’s a good idea. Do you know where you want to go ?”

“The US. I’d love to go to New York, actually.”

“Why ?”

“Because you’re there,” she teased. “No, but I really fell in love with this city. I don’t know why. I know the living is expensive there, so being an AU pair would be the perfect opportunity for me of being housed ‘freely’, if I may say so. I’d be able to visit everything there and make friends too. I’d get to see you more often too. That’s a plus,” Lilibeth nodded in agreement. “I could even find myself an American boyfriend like you did.” She smirked. “I’m going to get myself a Daveed.”

“Why do you only talk about Daveed ?” the elder one let out an exasperated sigh.

“He’s the only American I know !”

 

_And a cute one on the top of that._

 

“Lie ! You also know Tim and Lin.”

“Yeah but they are both taken. Daveed is pretty much single,” she dramatically sighed and Lilibeth couldn’t help but laugh at her sister’s tantrum. “And I’d be damned if he isn’t handsome.”

“I’ll make sure to tell him,” Lilibeth smirked.

“Oh please do,” she snorted. “Do you think mum will be okay with that ?”

“Well, I don’t why she wouldn’t be…. I mean… you’ll be twenty one, which is a plus.”

“I mean… if she doesn’t want me to go… could you help me change her mind ?” Lilibeth gently smiled.

“I’ll do my best, ma belle.”

 

* * *

 

“So, did you manage to get anything you wanted ?” Catherine asked the children as they arrived home.

“Yup,” Atlas nodded.

“Same here,” Molly replied.

“Perfect,” the matriarch nodded as the twins made their way upstairs. “Oh Lilibeth !”

“Yes, mum ?”

“Your Aunt Sarah called.”

“What does she want ?”

“Why, to see you of course, my dear !” she chuckled. “When she heard that you were coming, she told everyone and now they all want to come to my Christmas diner.”

“I thought that everyone was coming to your Christmas diner,” she tilted her head, slightly confused.

“No, Sarah wasn’t sure that she could make it, just like your cousins John and Mick.”

“So who’s coming ?”

“Sarah with her children, your cousins John, Mick, Claire and Sacha. Then Jean said he would come too, with his wife and Laura. And but the twins can’t come this year.”

“That’s a lot of people…” Lin mumbled as he heard the guest list.

“Don’t worry, you don’t have to remember all their names,” Lilibeth teased.

“Yeah… I heard you mentioned other twins ? Like Atlas and Molly ?”

“They’re my father’s elder brothers,” she explained. “Baptiste and Xavier.”

“Okay. Baptiste and Xavier,” he repeated.

“I glad I had made the groceries for at least twenty people,” the woman sighed as she looked into the fridge.

“Don’t you mean you’re glad James made the groceries for a least twenty people ?” Molly snorted.

“Hush you.”

 

              They all laughed.

 

“I’ll give you a hand tomorrow.”

“Thank you darling.”

 

* * *

 

               There was nothing like waking up next to Lin on Christmas Eve. The moment Lilibeth opened her eyes, she was attacked by many kisses and sweet nothings whispered into her ears. Lin wanted to make sure that she wouldn’t forget how loved she was, even if it meant smothering her with said love. She didn’t mind at all. She knew how sensitive Lin was when he came to touching and she was not going to deny him that.

 

“Nervous ?” she asked.

“Slightly. But I’ve got you with me, so I’m fine,” he replied and kissed the tip of her nose.

“Shower ?”

“Shower.”

 

               Since Lilibeth had offered her help to James and Catherine to settle everything for tonight, Lin was let alone for the day, roaming around the big house. He didn’t mind at all. He got to see many framed pictures of his darling and her family. That’s how he discovered how Charles looked like. Lilibeth definitely got his mismatching eyes and the red head. He was a handsome man; Lin couldn’t deny that.

When he looked back at the children, it wasn’t hard to understand why they looked so gorgeous. It was a family trait, basically. He couldn’t help but snap some pictures of Lilibeth when she was younger. There was one, in particular, that he really liked. They probably were in a park and it was spring. He could tell because of all the flowers surrounding them. Lilibeth looked around eleven or twelve.

A four years old Molly was clinging on her back while she had her arms extended, ready to catch Atlas who had jumped into her arms. This precious moment of their childhood was frozen in time. In a time where they were still kids, in a time where Lilibeth still lived in France, where she still played piano with her mother. A time where her heart was not broken yet. A time where her father was still alive. Lin turned his head when he heard a laugh coming from Molly’s room. He made his way upstairs and arched an eyebrow as he saw how wide Molly’s grin was as she was looking at her phone.

 

“Boys ?” he asked, curious.

“Fanfictions,” she replied, looking at him dead in the eyes.

“Okay. No judgement from me,” he chuckled. “Hamilton is a sort of huge fanfiction too so…” she shook her head and laughed. “I am surprised to see you chill instead of studying. It does happen then !”

“Only during full moons,” she playfully retorted. “No, I’m kidding. I…”

 

             She bit her lower lips and adverted her eyes. Lin could clearly sense the nervousness radiating from her.

 

“Hey,” he sat up next to her. “What’s up ?”

“I… Can I tell you a secret ?”

“Of course. I won’t tell. Cross my heart and hope to die,” he vowed, his hand on his heart.

“You can’t even tell Lilibeth. Especially not Lilibeth.”

“I won’t,” he promised.

“I… I met someone,” he wiggled his eyebrows.

“Ho, ho, ho Molly Williams…”

“Shut up,” she chuckled.

“Now, please, details,” he asked rather giddily and Molly couldn’t help but smile.

 

               He truly was sweet and the way he seemed genuinely interested in her stories warmed her heart.

 

“Okay, okay. Well, I met him on Instagram actually.”

 

Molly didn’t even know it was possible for someone’s eyebrows to wiggle that much.

 

“He’s American.”

“So that’s why you want to go to the US.”

“No. Yes. Maybe. I mean… I don’t want to go there for him. I want to go there because I love New York. Him being there is just a…”

“Plus ?”

“Coincidence, I was going to say,” she rectified.

“Yeah, right,” he snorted. “And… ? What’s happening between the two of you ?”

“Nothing really, we’re just good friends,” she smiled. “We do talk a lot, about my studies about his life. He’s… He’s really sweet. He understands me. I mean, the poor man doesn’t understand a thing when it comes to my studies but he’s so supportive and everything. And he does send me a lot of memes.”

“Damn, he’s a good one.”

“I know right ?” 

“What’s his name ?”

“Danny.”

“Danny?” he repeated and she nodded. “How do you feel about him ?”

“I… I don’t know. We’ve been talking for some time now and… I have a good feeling about him.”

“Have you talked ?”

“Talked ? We talk all the time,” she frowned, confused.

“No… What I mean is… Like have you called him ?”

“Now, Lin, what kind of garbage advice is that ?”

“Come on. It’s not that bad. I’m not talking about a video call, if you’re concerned about him seeing your face. But just so you can hear each other’s voice.”

“I know how he sounds like.”

“You do ?”

“Yeah, he posted some videos on his Instagram.”

“Now you’re not really being fair on him. You get to know how he sounds and looks like but he doesn’t.”

“You think ?”

“Well… Have you asked him ?”

“We did talk about it… But I was…”

“Scared ?”

“I’m not scared,” she frowned. “I’m… I mean, I’m nervous. What if he doesn’t like my voice ? I love his voice but God what if he thinks I sound stupid ? Maybe he’ll never want to see me and we’ll stop talking.”

“I don’t see why he wouldn’t like your voice. You have a lovely voice, Molly,” he tilted his head, confused and she just wanted to hug him because he was so genuine and caring. “If you spend your life dwelling on ‘ifs’ and ‘might-have-beens’, you’ll never be happy. Believe me, I’ve been living like that for several months until I made the choice to be with your sister. And everything’s been perfect ever since. And if that Danny of yours stops talking to you because he doesn’t like your voice, then he can fuck off !” she slightly smiled. “His sorry ass won’t even know what he missed !”

“Okay, Lin, I think I get it.”

“Why don’t you want your sister to know about this ? Especially if you’re just friends.”

“Because… Because maybe I don’t want to be just friends with him. Right not I’m fine being friends but who knows maybe in the future that’ll change and if it does…” she sighed. “My last relationship isn’t a glorious one. I was with a condescending prick who treated me like shit and only wanted my money. Lilibeth was there to pick up the pieces after. She became quite protective with me in this area. That’s why I don’t use my personal account on Instagram to talk to Danny. I have a… a studygram.”

“A studygram ?”

“It’s basically an Instagram account with me posting pictures and videos of me studying,” she explained and he beamed.

“Oh, that’s cool ! Like that, you can motivate people !”

“That’s the spirit yes. I have a youtube channel too.”

“What do you post there ?”

“Study with me videos.”

“It’s basically you studying, right ?”

“Yeah,” she nodded. “I know that a lot of people lack motivation to study and that studying with someone, even if it’s just having them on screen with or without music on the background, it helps. A couple of friends asked me to do this and I gave it a try. Many people liked it,” she shrugged. “I like it too.”

“But how did you even come across Danny ?” he questioned, confused.

“Let’s say… I saw a picture of him and I liked it and I commented on it and then we simply started talking. Turns out we have a lot in common.”

“Do I smell a romance ?” he teased and she couldn’t help but chuckle.

“You’re really sweet Lin,” he blinked. “I’m glad my sister found you.”

“I’m glad I found her,” he honestly replied and he could see that Molly was satisfied with his answer.

 

              He observed her for a couple of seconds.

 

“You should call him.”

“You think so ?”

“Well you’ve been talking for a while and you both like each other. Why don’t you call him now ?”

“Now ?” she blinked. “As in now, _now_?”

“Well, you were talking to him right now, right ?” she carefully nodded. “And it must be…” he looked at his watch. “Around eight in the morning for him. It’s not THAT early. And it’s Christmas Eve. It could be… like your present to him.”

“I-I don’t know… I’m not sure.”

“Hey,” he gently squeezed her hand. “I’m sure that’ll make him very happy. And don’t you want to hear his voice directed to you, instead of having to watch his videos ?”

“I’d love it.”

“What’s holding you back, then ?” he chuckled.

 

She tried to find an excuse; anything could work. But really… she didn’t.

 

“Nothing,” he arched an eyebrow as he looked at her phone rather expectantly. “Fine, fine. I’m sending him a message, just so I know he’s not busy being handsome or whatever,” Lin smirked.

 

They didn’t even have to wait for ten seconds.

 

_Danny incoming call._

 

“Oh shit.”

“Hey, there’s nothing to be scared of. Your English is good, you’re good, everything is good,” she took a deep breath and picked up.

“Hi,” Lin was surprised at how at ease she sounded on the phone, as if the previous conversation didn’t take place.

“ _Hello, Em._ ”

“Could you hold on a second ?” she smiled and then she muted the mic. “Oh my fucking God his voice is so hot and I am going to die,” Lin busted out of laughing.

“I’ll leave you to it,” she nodded as he stood up and left the room.

“I’m back. Yeah… Well I like your voice too.”

 

He couldn’t help but smile as he closed the door behind him. He spent most of the afternoon with Atlas. He played him different compositions of his, talked a little bit of his family, so he could at least recognize the people who were going to come tonight. He explained him that it was really nice when Lilibeth came around for the holidays, because everyone in her family adored her and wanted to see her. Again, Lin was not surprised, Lilibeth truly was lovable.

               He learnt several things about Atlas too. The man could really kill for some Oreos, which is why James always left several packets of those around the house, at least twice in every room. That made him laugh and remind hm of Lilibeth’s tendency to leave glasses of water all around the flat too.

Atlas explained him that the competition was important to him for his file that he had to turn to the university where he intended to do a master’s degree. The more competitions you won, the better. Lin was sure that there was no way a university would refuse Atlas Williams; his reputation preceded him. But at least, he was working hard for what he loved and Lin could not blame him for that.

At some point he left the young man to call his parents. They were both excited for him to be in France, knowing that he never went there before and he promised them he would take some videos and some pictures for them. When he was sure he was out of earshot for everyone else, he talked to his mother about his plan to propose to Lilibeth. She didn’t even bring Vanessa up. She merely told that she wished to meet her first and that she wanted what was best for him. If Lilibeth was his happiness, then so be it. At least, his parents approved. Even though they had never met the French lady, they already loved her. Who didn’t ?

 

“Catherine, there’s something I need to ask you,” Lin called her as he entered the kitchen and saw that she was alone.

“Sure thing, what is it ?”

“I… I want to marry Lilibeth,” she arched an eyebrow.

“Don’t you think that’s too soon ?” he vigorously shook his head.

“No. I should have married her sooner,” he paused.  “Probably when I met her,” she chuckled.

“Easy boy.”

“I mean it, Catherine. I’m not saying that I’m going to propose tomorrow or anything. That’s the point, I don’t know when it’s going to happen but if it is going to happen, I need your blessing.”

“What would you do if I refuse to give you my blessing ?”

“I’d fly her far away and marry her anyway,” he replied without missing a beat. She laughed.

“Why do you want to marry her ?”

“Because… I love her. As cliché as it sounds, I do. I don’t want to put a ring on her finger just to show the world that she is mine. She’s her own person. But I want the world to know that she granted me the honour of being by her side for the rest of my life. She’s… she a never-ending sunrise, she’s the happiness I’ve always dreamt about.”

“When did you know ?”

“What ?”

“That you wanted to marry her ?” he blinked.

“I woke up one morning, she was asleep and I was admiring her. Then she opened her sleepy eyes and said ‘ _hey_ ’,” he chuckled, more to himself, recalling the distant memory. “She simply said ‘ _hey_ ’.”

“You make her happy, you know that ?” she softly spoke. “Like I’ve never seen her before. After my husband’s death… she had never been the same. But with you ? It’s like she never left. She’s satisfied with you.”

“As I am.”

“You have my blessing, Lin,” she nodded. “But please, buy her a pretty ring, okay ?” he chuckled as he hugged her.

“I will.”

 

               Lin didn’t know how he didn’t scream as soon as she gave her blessing. Ah yes, he didn’t want to ruin the surprise. But he had to tell Chris and Alex as soon as possible. Oh and maybe he should actually show Catherine the ring he wanted to get her ?

                 Maybe he could try to look around here with her, she knew her daughter’s taste, didn’t she ? If would be safer and he knew that if Catherine helped, Lilibeth would not be disappointed by the ring. He knew it was just a jewel and that maybe she didn’t care about it, but he wanted it to be perfect.

                  Completely overjoyed, he decided to go upstairs. He knew that Lilibeth was currently spending some quality time with her brother, so he decided to head towards the younger sibling’s room, only to find her lying on the ground, staring at the ceiling.

 

“What are you doing ?” Lin questioned, tilting his head.

“Finding my inner chill,” she whispered and he blinked.

“Okay. Mind if I join you ?” she shook her head and he laid on the floor next to her. “How was the call ?”

“Perfect. He’s so sweet ? And… so hot like… How can you be so hot with your voice only ? Damn boi,” he chuckled. “I never want to forget how his voice sounds like,” she murmured. “I… I just wish I could see him.”

“Maybe next time, you could try a video call.”

“Yeah… Maybe,” she turned her head to get a better look at him. “Don’t you think it’s stupid ?”

“What ?”

“My crush over Danny.”

“W-why would it be stupid ?” he asked, confused.

“Cause he’s far away.”

“Distance doesn’t mean a thing. I mean, look at Lilibeth and I. Yes, she lives in the US, but she’s French first. I just got lucky.”

“Hm…”

“And from what you’re saying, he seems like a cool dude.”

“He really is.”

“So how could you blame yourself for falling for him ? I’m pretty sure I would have too,” she burst out of laughing, clenching her sides.

“I didn’t know you were bi !”

“Oh, I don’t know if I really am,” he admitted. “But I’ve been attracted to some guys before, yeah.”

“I feel you.”

“Lin ?” they both tilted their heads up to see Lilibeth leaning against the doorway. “Are you finding your inner chill with Molly ?”

“Yup.”

“Well, I’m sorry to disturb you, but we have to get ready. The guess will be there soon.”

“Alright, alright,” he got up and turned around. “You got this, Molly.”

“Thanks, Lin.”

“What was that about ?” the red head asked as they entered the bathroom.

“Her studies,” he smoothly lied. “You know how it can be. I wonder how she is still alive with how much she studies.”

“At least she’s the top student.”

“That’s simply amazing.”

 

               After a quick shower, they both dresses themselves up to the nines. While Lin went with a classic white shirt and green and red tie, Lilibeth opted for a long red dress too with a green bow in her hair. She looked beautiful and perfectly embodied the Christmas spirit. She was pretty as a picture. He made sure to hype her up once she was fully dress, asking her to twirl around as he took some videos and some pictures. Probably to put them on twitter. As Lin headed downstairs, since she guests were to arrive soon, Lilibeth quickly facetimed with Daveed. She had promised him she would.

 

“Well Darlin’ !” he grinned as he saw her. “You look absolutely gorgeous.”

“I was going to say the same but… aren’t you in your pyjamas ?”

“Hey, chills, it’s still early here, okay ?” he chuckled. “Give us a twirl,” she did as she was told. “You’re beautiful, really.”

“Thanks, Diggs.”

“So, happy to be back home ?”

“Of course. I missed it. I missed them so much,” she honestly replied. “It’s good to be back. And it’s for two weeks or so. We have some time to ourselves too. There are so many places I want to take Lin too,” she beamed.

“You’re cute when you’re all enthusiastic like that.”

“Fuck off,” he laughed.

“You seem really happy, Diggs,” Lilibeth noticed.

“I guess I am.”

“Why’s that ?”

“I’ll tell you once you’re back, okay ?”

“Okay,” she pouted, making him laugh.

“How is everything there ? Is Lin dying of nervousness ?”

“Not at all ! My family actually likes him. He still has some people to meet, but he’ll do just fine. He’s Lin.”

“Everyone loves Lin.”

“Everyone loves Lin,” she nodded. “What about you ?”

“Yeah, I’m at my parents’ house. We don’t have much people coming tonight but it’s nice. I haven’t seen my mother for a couple of months, which sucks. But now that I’m back she’s just so happy and never lets me out of her sight.”

“Awww, she missed you so much.”

“When are you coming back ?”

“On the tenth of January, if everything goes well. My brother’s competition is on the eighth, so yeah.”

“Tell Lin to film it. I want to see you play and I’m pretty sure Alex would die for this clip.”

“Oh my god, yes he would,” she chuckled. “But hey, don’t worry, I won’t even have to ask. Lin will already be filming. You know how he is,” Daveed cracked a smile.

“You’re right.”

“I really don’t know what got you all happy and all but I just can’t wait to know about it,” he merely chuckled, his curly hair bouncing on his toned shoulder.

“Merry Christmas Lilibeth.”

“It’s not Christmas yet,” she retorted.

“We both know we’ll be awfully busy tomorrow. Better wish it now.”

“You’re right. Merry Christmas, Diggs.”

“See ya!”

 

               Lilibeth smoothed the wrinkles on her dress before going downstairs. She could clearly hear Molly and Lin talking about her YouTube channel, Lin being particularly interested in it while Atlas was adjusting his hair through the mirror.

 

“He must break all the girls’ hearts,” Lin remarqued. Everyone in this family was pretty.

“Yeah, cause he’s gay,” Molly snickered and Lilibeth slapped her shoulder. “What ? You know it’s true. But hey, at least the boys are lucky.”

“I didn’t know…” the Puerto Rican mumbled.

“That’s alright,” Atlas reassured, chuckling. “It’s not like I mentioned it to you before. I simply forgot.”

“How can you forget about your own sexuality ?” his twin wondered.

“Molly, you forget to eat and to sleeps.”

“You got me there,” she finger-gunned him.

“Pull the trigger, coward,” he dared.

“I will never understand them…” Lilibeth sighed as she watched them interact. Lin laughed.

“They’re kid, let them have their fun.”

“Children, come say hi !” Catherine called from the living room and everyone followed.

 

               Sarah, Catherine’s sister, came with her two daughters, Christelle, who just turned twelve and Chloe who was eighteen. Then came Lilibeth’s cousins, John, who was a landscaper, his sister Sacha, who was an accountant, Mick who was a lawyer and Claire who was studying to become an architect. Jean, Catherine’s brother, arrived slightly late, _damn traffic, I’m telling you_ , with his daughter Laura. Lin observed Lilibeth with a small smile as everyone was showering her with kisses and hugs.

 

“They’re happy to see her,” Molly told him as she watched them. “They don’t get to see her often and she’s quite the favourite around here.”

“Don’t you mind ?”

“What ?”

“Her being the favourite.”

“Not at all, she’s my favourite too,” she chuckled. “Don’t tell Atlas.”

“My lips are sealed.”

“Everyone switched to English tonight, just for you, Lin,” Catherine smiled.

“Oh I’m sorry…” he scratched the back of his neck, feeling a blush creep on his cheeks. “I don’t mean to be such a bother.”

“You’re really not !” Jean reassured. “We love to practice our English.”

“Except for the kids,” Claire pointed out. “We’ll just translate it for you.”

“That’s nice,” Lin smiled as he nodded, grateful.

“That’s my job.”

“What, translating ?” She nodded.

“Yup. I’m a translator.”

“Nice !”

 

               They spent the rest of the evening pleasantly chatting together. Many embarrassing anecdotes were exchanged and Lilibeth and Atlas were both asked to play a little bit of music by the end of the meal. Lin got to speak a little bit of French and learnt some swear words too. They were agreeable people to have around. They asked him a lot of question about his job and about America too. Especially about the food and Lin had to admit that the food in France was way, way better.

               He never once felt left out by the French around him, they always tried to include him in their conversations but he spent most of the evening with Molly. He was glad that was seated next to her. He absolutely adored the younger twin. She was witty and sarcastic yet deeply sensitive when you looked deep enough. She told him a little more about her studies and her videos. He told her that she was welcomed anytime in New York, there would always be a room for her in the flat. She told him that it’d be the perfect opportunity to film vlogs too.

               When Lin woke up the next morning, he was alone in the bed. He quickly checked the time before getting dressed and going downstairs. James was serving breakfast, with the delicious smell of pancakes and coffee handing out in the air. Molly was on her phone, probably texting Danny while Atlas was eating. Catherine and Lilibeth were nowhere to be seen.

 

“Hey,” he greeted the twins as he took a seat.

“Hey. Slept well ?” Atlas asked.

“Yeah, and you two ?”

“I did,” he nodded. “Though I’m pretty sure the Molly didn’t.”

“You didn’t sleep well ?” he looked at the red head you snorted. “Did you even sleep ?”

“Sleep is for the weak.”

“You’re going to kill yourself one day,” Atlas sighed as he shook his head.

“I bet you’d like that.”

“You’re my twin, stupid. You can’t die cause I’d die too.”

“Oh shit, you’re right,” Lin blinked at the interaction, confused.

“Good morning, Mr. Lin.”

“Good morning, James. Merry Christmas.”

“Merry Christmas. Would you like some coffee ?”

“Yes please,” he smiled as the butler poured the hot beverage in his cup.

“Sugar ?”

“No thank you.”

“Oh god, not you too,” Lin turned his head toward Atlas who was looking at him with a disgusted face.

“What ?”

“You drink your coffee back. Just like Molly.”

“Yeah, coffee buddies,” she grinned as she fist-bumped him. “He doesn’t like coffee. The only thing that keeps him running is chocolate.”

“Oh, I see.”

“Hello darling,” he gazed up to see Lilibeth coming toward him.”

“Hello, love,” she gently kissed him before taking a seat next to him.

“Slept well ?”

“Yeah. I got worried when I didn’t see you.”

“I was making some arrangements with my mother,” she simply replied. “We’ll open the gifts once we’re done breakfasting, alright ?”

“Alright.”

 

               Lilibeth was overjoyed by the books Lin got her. He knew that Oscar Wilde was a safe option for him and he managed to get pretty editions of _The picture of Dorian Gray_ and _The importance of being Earnest._ Lin got several sweaters from the twins and Catherine and a beautiful leather journal from Lilibeth, with his initial carved in it. He immediately kissed her as a thank you. Almost all the presents were exchanged until only one remained under the tree. It was from Lilibeth to her younger brother. Molly told the Puerto Rican to film its unpackaging. Confused, he did as he was told. Atlas stopped the moment he saw his present.

 

“Are you kidding me ?” he shrieked. “ARE YOU MESSING WITH ME, LILIBETH ?” the red head simply laughed and shook her head. “This can’t be real.”

“What is it ?” Lin whispered to Molly, since he couldn’t see the gift yet.

“A new violin.”

“I thought he already had one.”

“Not that one,” she chuckled.

“What’s so special about it ?”

“What’s so special about it ?” Atlas repeated, having heard Lin. “What’s so special about it !? Lin, we’re talking about a Stradivari !”

“O-okay…” he carefully nodded.

“I’ve always wanted one !”

“It’s one of the most expensive violins in the world.” Molly supplied, seeing the look of confusion on the Puerto Rican’s face.

“Most expensive ?”

“Yeah.”

“How much ?”

“Around fifteen thousand.”

“Excuse me ?”

“You heard me.”

“It’s already tuned,” Lilibeth told him as he took the beautiful violin out of his case. “I figured it would be better to have a good violin for the competition, right ?” she smiled and he jumped into his sisters’ arms.

“I love you so much, thank you. Thank you so much.”

“Hey I promised you I’d buy you a Stradivari,” she reminded him.

“Yeah, but I never thought you’d actually do it,” he chuckled. “Oh my god can I try it now ?”

“Be my guest,” she nodded.

 

            As he started playing, Lin got closer to his girl.

 

“You bought a fifteen thousand euros violin ?” he whispered, his eyebrows meeting his hairline.

“Yup.”

“That’s… that’s why you live in a shitty apartment, even though you have money,” he realized. “You were saving money for his gift.”

“Yup.”

“Wow, that’s wow,” she merely chuckled.

“I mean, Lin, if you also had the money to buy an expensive present to your sister, would you ?”

“Yes, of course,” he nodded. “But damn fifteen thousand…”

“We don’t count when we love,” she simply shrugged. “Look at his smile Lin. That’s enough.”

 

                   And she was right.

 

* * *

 

COME TALK TO ME ON MY [TUMBLR](https://tinywhim.tumblr.com/)

Molly Williams [moodboard](https://tinywhim.tumblr.com/post/187598204915/vairons-moodboard-molly-williams-and-i-am-so)

 

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The bitch is back and she got so many things to tell you. First of all, I published not so long ago a new OS [Dale Sweeze/reader] in my OS collection 'IT'S ALWAYS BEEN YOU', so go check it out and tell me what you think about it.   
> Beta reader : HeyItsValeria13   
> Your comments and kudos mean the world to me.


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